I lay down every night hoping and praying.
Hoping the nightmares will go.
Praying that your ok and still alive.
The images flash through my head.
Like the headlights of a passing car.
Showing signs.
Signs of death.
Signs of brokenness.
Is this God's way of telling me something.
Telling me you're next.
That I'll be going to your funeral next.
and looking at your lifeless body.
As I say my final goodbye.

It’s not fair
It’s not right
You shouldn’t be gone
We shouldn’t be grieving
You should be here
Playing your French horn
Being the great person you are
I didn’t know you that well
But you were my friend
It’s not right
You were too young
You shouldn’t of been taken
I’m angry
I’m raged
I need to know why
Why you where taken
Why so young
You’re in a better place they say
You’re back home with God
But why

My heart is heavy
My mind is filled
With thoughts of you
With thoughts of the past
It hurts to know your gone
It hurts to know you didn't care
You didn't care to wear your seat-belt
You didn't care to call a cab
You where taken form us too soon
and now all we have left are the memories
Memories of the good and the bad
Memories of the laughs
Memories of that day
The day you were taken
Taken back home to God

I feel free
I feel alive*
I feel a change thats coming on
a positive, great change
I once was *lost
Once was playing with fire
that was until I found my way
Found my guardian angel
that walks by my side
she guides me and watches over me
I am grateful
I am thankful
that she is here for me
no ones cared
until I found
*My Guardian angel

i am bold
you were cold
you broke my heart
i re-created the mold
you tried breaking that too
but i am no fool
i am **bold

I mask my pain* with visions of happiness
I mask my pain with lies
I mask my pain because of fear
I mask my pain because I'm afraid
Afraid of rejection
afraid you’ll stop caring
I fear the worse
I fear the day it all comes true
My fears they over whelm me
Fight my every move
I push them back into the depths
Into the darkness
They find a way to surface
Find away to gain strength
I mask the fear and pain
I mask my worse nightmare’s
I hide in the light
I Wear a mask that says I’m fine
when in reality
I’m hiding behind the **mask