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Clare udy Jan 2017
Foot on the pedal as far as it can go, inhaling what feels like my last cigarette. My mind is so far beyond forgiveness, all I want to do is end this.
With scars on my legs, and bags under my eyes, I sit in my car by the cemetery, contemplating wether to be with the silent and invisible or go back home.
Clare udy Jan 2017
Foot on the pedal as far as it can go, inhaling what feels like my last cigarette. My mind is so far beyond forgiveness, all I want to do is end this.
With scars on my legs, and bags under my eyes, I sit in my car by the cemetery, contemplating wether to be with the silent and invisible or go back home.
Clare udy Dec 2014
I'm a foolish fragile spine. Wanting all that is not mine, I want him but we're not " right ". They all agree that I'm a suffercator. I'm burying all my secrets in my skin.love is just a camouflage of what reresembles rage again. Because I love you, I'll let you go. My love is just to dark to care. My smile was taken long ago, if I can change I hope I never know. You couldn't hate enough to love. I only wish you were my friend. Spiraling down, biting words likea wolf howling.I used to be a lunattic from the gracious days, my aching heart would bleed for you to see, but now no more I love yous the language is leaving me. I didn't feel the fairytale feeling anymore, am I a stupid girl for ever dreaming that I could. If you leave when I go, find me in the shallows.
I don't know what this mean but it's a bunch of lyric sections from different songs.
Clare udy Dec 2014
You are in my imagination.
You are my life
you are my love
you are my love of my life.
you are nothing
you are everything
I am nothing
but I am everything.
You are my everything
and I am your nothing.
Nothing is my love, but everything is you.
You are my imagination, love and everything. I am your imagination,  but not your everything but your nothing.
Clare udy Dec 2014
You are in my imagination.
You are my life
you are my love
you are my love of my life.
you are nothing
you are everything
I am nothing
but I am everything.
You are my everything
and I am your nothing.
Nothing is my love, but everything is you.
You are my imagination, love and everything. I am your imagination,  but not your everything but your nothing.
Clare udy Dec 2014
I can't stop thinking about you, every little happy and sad moment that I've experienced.  Every embarrassing moment around
Clare udy Dec 2014
A thought passed my mind last night, as I sit on the pale green steps in your garage listening to the words of your past. As your relatives relate to it, and I sit there as if I'm invisible, just observing everyone and questioning myself. Yesterday was one of the most heart-rending days I've experienced in a while, where saying my goodbyes to you was now showing that I mean every word of what I said. For the whole day, I analysed my thoughts and feelings and came to the conclusion that I was empty and felt that there was no life left in me. I found myself wanting to be around you so badly but couldn't bare to speak a cent. In the evening when I went out for a smoke, I sat there on the concrete steps listening to the sound of sadness blaring from my phone. I hear the door open, and there he stands holding a cigarette. I quickly look away, and act as if he didn't exist; but as my thoughts wander off, my brain rapes my emotions; telling me "I can't do this", I can not do this".. all I wanted to do is burst into tears and be comforted. As time went by I noticed that I was the only one upset about this, so I began to associate with him a little, where my heart let out a bit of a sigh and I just let go. I had no more energy in trying to not talk to him, it was poring the energy away keeping all theses thoughts in my head. It still is. As midnight hit, I said my goodbyes to the others whom were amazingly welcome to me and then I set back on my last words for the next few months to the one I love with all my heart. My heart pounding and my voice shaking and quiet, I opened the door and said I was leaving, as he looked over he showed a bit of sympathy and returned the goodbye.I never knew that saying goodbye twice would be even more difficult.
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