I erode without falter                                                           ­                                           
Riding on the prayer that holds a pretty notion                                                           ­         
To detach much like my former self shepherds euphoria                                                
The salt burns, red flesh blooms, puckered and ignored                                                
Hear me you beast of the sullen depths!                                                          ­              
****** into submission, subdued through the dull ache                                                      
I do not deny my servitude, I relish in it                                                               ­             
The plummet expected, a death desired
An appetite for masochism seeks recipes for avidity                                                        
T­he bruises left are a sweet delight, a benevolent impression                                              
A taste of copper and gray swindles a once ignorant soul                                                
Walk me to the ****** existence of man, we’ll watch its rapture                                    
That flaccid timber where he sits burns, forever embedded                                                  
The nights of putrid orchards sought after with vigor                                                          
W­e are burdened and writhing, just as ***** ought

I accost daylight, reviling in the promiscuity of the waken world
Come, be absent with me, enjoy the splendor of the famine
The only pleasure we’ll allow ourselves is that of a despondent heart
As we weaken the bonds that chain us, we’ll destroy ourselves
How can I rationalize my desires, their innocence shames me
To be reprehensible, oh such a glorious way to be
We ran through the streets encased in neon luminance
You, with your hope and rebellion
Me, in awe of you
This truancy, this desolate homage to backroads and swindled affairs
It leaves a longing to wear her fur coat, my makeup soiled beautifully
Those nights of dreams, and dreams, and dreams, resurrect disenchanted
As I lay aching, biting the the cold steel for the knowledge of ones price
The nullity welcomes a confusion, searching for a fragment of familiarity
Wanting and wishing back the stale taste of the endless mornings
I’ll bring with me the calm, the reassurance of futile worth
The length is calculated, the smirking clock relishing in his dismal pace
We trade the dampened moss as the stars scoff at our ignorance
They whisper, piercing the darkness with their reminder
three moons, alas three moons

I pine
The ache in the center of me throbs
It holds a power,
a power that I gladly surrender to
My chest constricts
My breath grows dense
Through the tips of my fingers and toes
Electricity radiates
Numb
The nerves of my scalp beg
They beg
Pull my hair
I crave
Mouth watering
Head aching
limbs writhing
It's all for not
He wants me not
Lust.. Lust
Not just a word
How I long for the *******
the frantic rhythm
the Hands
the Mouths
the Friction
It's all for not
He wants me not

Fear overwhelms
The antisipation dibilitating
Bracing for impact
Crashing blind
The anxiety erodes my former self
I'm a shell
A shaking leaf
Waiting for the gust of wind that detaches me  
All I've know.. gone

Rain pours
Sleep rarely comes
I medicate, intoxicate, debilitate
I'm trapped
Trapped in my own mind
I'll never measure up to my imaginations expectations
I'm a master of my own sabotage
I crave, constantly craving
I want to be painfully in love
I want everyone
I want everything
I'm a black hole
A vortex
Unquenchable
Writhing
Confusing pain for pleasure
Pleasure for pain
I need the pleasure
I want the pain
Sensations paralyzing
The dull ache never ceasing
When did I become this ravenous beast?
Can I be satisfied?