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claire Nov 2014
A lot of people don't know what they have till it's gone. They don't appreciate that person till they've passed. But sometimes taht just helps us appreciate all they taught us while they were here. We can feel ourselves slowly forgetting the sound of their laughter. Slowly forgetting the memories we shared with them. But we often find ourselves looking at old pictures and reminiscing on the memories we do remember. Myself personally have learned that I can't changed what happened to my mom but I can accept it. I had this fear that by accepting it and moving on I would lose her, but that's not it I actually found myself a lot closer to her even though she isn't here physically. I'm glad my last words to her were "I love you" rather than the hurtful "I hate you." Didn't know it'd be the last thing I'd ever say to you but i'm glad it was. I remember having a dream right after you passed and I told you I missed you and you told me you missed me too. You really had a huge impact on my life, gave me the love and care that I needed, and helped me see the world in different ways. So for that I thank you. Thank you, mom. For everything.
this is for my mom obviously, I miss her.
claire Nov 2014
Oh sweet Jane,
How I miss you so
wait, no I don't.
I have to let you go.
Do I want to? Yes and no.
Oh sweet jane, the dilemma you've caused me.
The wind cries Mary!
How should I react to that?
Is jimi referring to good ole I mean bad ole Mary? Jane I must leave you.
No interest for you at all.
The things I deal with I just stall!
Now my words might be a trigger so if they are i'll stop.
I'll just leave you with this, I struggle with letting go of sweet mary,
or was it jane? Both!
But don't keep me here any longer, for I know these thoughts must slumber.
I wrote this because I'm having a hard time in rehab and this is how I feel about sweet mary...

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