I have loved a man who controlled my soul.
I want to be strong, but I feel like a fool.
I feel so weak, and all I do is moan
My thoughts jumbled, my words mumbled.
He’s taken my life, turned me into a drone.

He makes promises he doesn’t keep  
So I stand on the hilltop wanting to leap.
My heart breaks and bleeds
He won’t even try to fill my needs.
I’ve given all I can and I wish I could stop loving
This cruel cold man.

He takes my soul and gives nothing but pain.
Why do I stay when I have nothing to gain?
My eyes fill with tears, and I cry from inside.
My heart begins to bleed and I think it has died.
I want to run and hide where my eyes can’t see.
I don’t want myself to see this pathetic me.

But in hiding I’ll be alone with my hurt
My heart is smashed, ground into the dirt.
I feel I’m dissolving, melting away.
My mind says to leave, my heart wants to stay.
I’m weak and afraid and I want to retreat
How can a heart feel, when it cannot beat.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128

Shimmer and flow
Wood Lake at sunset seems to emit a  soft glow.
Waves like edges move and dip
Feathering out, tumble and flip.

I hear the giggling of happy little girls
Dunking heads underwater and wetting their curls.
Scraggly young boys jump off a long pier
Showing their bravado that they have no fear.

Mallard ducks and tan little birds soar and float.
Passing patient people fishing off docks, or in a boat.
As I watch natures glory a gentle breeze caresses my sleeve.
I am at peace with myself with nothing to grieve.

I am very grateful for the time I spent here.
It gave me the chance to think with a mind that is crystal clear.
I was in my own world relaxing on my inflatable chair
With the sunshine as my companion floating here and there.

This quaint little lakehouse is a Godsend to friends
Who need  some time to heal, make changes or amends.
The owners are loving in spirit, generous and kind.
They open their home as a haven for the heart, soul and mind.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128

I’m lost.
Where is my home?
Where do I belong?
Where will I find peace?

I’m lost.
My path is worn and I trip over
deadwood and dried out brush.
The wind is blowing away the
remnants of a life that once was.

I’m lost.
I think I want to go this way.
To a place where I will have it all.
But will I still be lost?

Where am I?
Why can’t I find my path to happiness?
I yearn for newness but am afraid of the unfamiliar.
I long for a full-filled life, but do nothing to fill my soul.
How can I find it when
I’m lost
To a life that is afraid to be lived.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128

Voices have choices, they speak of your need.
Voices that are mute cannot be freed.
Being mute and silent makes you scream inside.
Silencing the voices, your choices have died.

Speak up voices! Even though you are afraid to say.
Have courage and strength and take a risk along the way.
Will you feel despair or rejoice?
Only you will know if the voice made the right choice.


Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128

How will I know if I’ve made the right choice?
Will I hear a deep resonating powerful voice?
Telling me YES You are strong and secure.
          NO You are weak senseless and unsure.

How will I know that the future is mine?
Will I see an illuminating vision that is a sign?
Telling me YES This is where you belong.
          NO This idea of your was all wrong.

How will I know that happiness is within my reach?
Will I grasp an iron handle or a slippery leech?
Telling me YES Keep on trying, you’re almost there.
          NO How could you hurt those around you who care.

How will I know this journey going the right direction?
Will I smell a bouquet of roses or a putrid infection?
Telling me YES You chose the right course.
          NO Now your filled with regret and remorse.

How will I know that  Independence and I will meet?
Will the taste of freedom be sour or sweet?
Telling me YES Eat up, clean your plate.
          NO You’re starving but now it’s too late.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128