melt me down
condense me to my base elements
make me what i am inside

melt me down
burn that layer of filth outside
and let my core breathe

melt me down
see me, me, me
see my insides and yearn for them

melt me down,
against my will.
against my better judgement.

if you want to see, see.

Strong hands, big and warm
Covering, comforting and caressing me.
Smoothing my skin.
Erasing my erosion.

In wide strokes of blackboard Braille-
*It's all going to be ok.

This noise is acid on my brain
burning straight through
leaving none in its path.

I feel it-
the loss
the pain
the sizzle.
The empty hole it leaves
running straight from my skull to my breast.

I wish it would spread.
Leaving one with a hole is cruelty.
Destroying the total is a gift.

I don't want to lose nights under your arms
Dusks in your eyes
Mornings in your hands.

I do want to lose those nights lying alone
And those dusks observing what I would never be a part of
And those mornings, feet away from you.

I don't want to lose you.
But I do want to lose missing you.

I'm just afraid the two must come as one.

I can't be this alone, with you.

If I'm to be alone, let me call myself alone.
Don't make me suffer this killing hope.

Wrapped in your sleeping arms, let me not think
"alone"
Watching you laugh, make me not think
"alone"
Feeling your lips on mine, force me not to think
"alone"
I can't be this alone, with you.

I think of you by the minute. Can't you think of me
sometimes?
You say you know, but if you know why don't you care?
If you know, why don't you try?
I can't be this alone, with you.

Free from expectation and hope, I can survive.
But this, this drains me. This will leave me dry.
Choose one and let it be that. Just choose.
Because I can't do this with you.

I am free in the darkness.
Free from your eyes,
Binding and infuriating.
Free from myself.

I am safe in the darkness,
For unknown danger is no danger at all.
Blindfold me to comfort me.
Whip me to awaken me.

I am strong in the darkness.
Convicted with conviction,
And only in the present tense.

I am blind to everything in the darkness,
And I don't want to see or believe.
I am empty in the darkness,
And I don't want to be filled.

Impatient breath
Hands erasing, smoothing all ridges.
Skin to skin becomes just...skin.

You cover me and discover me
Your fire singes any thought I may have had
And all that is left is you
And me
And your hands on me.

As my desperation grows your movements slow
Until desire is all there is.

This is more than you and me.
This is us as one.