Christine Morrone

Christine Morrone Feb 2013

Looking

I walk in the house and look for you
You are not sitting at the table in the kitchen
I go to the garage to see if you are out there
You are not out there putzing around

I then tell myself he has to be somewhere
He would not leave without saying good bye
Where are you and why can't I find you
Tears fill my eyes as reality sets in

He is no longer here with me
The first man I ever loved is gone forever
The tears come and will not stop
I tried to feel your presence but I can not

I listen as people say talk to him he hears you
But I wonder how do they know that
Is it just what they say to make it easier for them
I talk but I feel nothing just my heart breaking more

I have sat by that cold stone and tried to feel you
The ground is so hard and it is a very cold place
Are you there or have you moved on to a better place
Maybe you do not have to be my dad any more

I have something to talk about and need advice
Who can I go to now and who will listen and not judge
I need you dad and always will so I will keep talking
And hope somehow you hear me and still love me

Christine Morrone Feb 2013

The Chair

I stood there and thought something is missing
Something that brings me happiness
I know most people would say it's only a chair
But it is so much more than that

I think to myself did I do something wrong
Is this a way of getting back at me for something
I start to feel this sinking feeling in my stomach
Why oh why was it taken from me

Then I see it my chair my chair my beautiful chair
I start to feel relief all though my veins
I know most people would say its just a chair
But to me it so much more than that

I have had some of the most amazing conversations in that chair
I have sang some of the greatest songs in that chair
I have cried in that chair
I have listened in that chair

I have star gazed in that chair
I have learned to love again in that chair
I know most people would say its just a chair
But to me it is so much more than that

Christine Morrone Jan 2013

Penny

She was my secret keeper
She was my best friend
She was always at my side
She was my workout buddy
She was a unconditional love
She was there in good times
She was there in bad times
She was part of the family
She was with me for thirteen years
She was trying so hard to not leave me
She was gone in front of my eyes
She was the best pet anyone could have
She was loved

Christine Morrone Jan 2013

Thoughts

Can you see the sadness
The constant obsessing is madness
Do you wonder where the smile is
Or why I am no longer his

Did I ever love him or did I settle instead
Those sad thoughts always in my head
The pressure to find someone oh so strong
Too think all these years maybe I was wrong

I certainly do not regret any of the years
But lately there are too many tears
I think of what the future has in store for me
But know the future is not for me to see

I tell myself take it day by day
The voices telling me that's the only way
I will keep going through my life
Thinking all along how hard it is to be a wife

Christine Morrone Jan 2013

Snitchhole

I'm telling
That's all I hear
The constant yelling
Go ahead my dear

Christine Morrone Jan 2013

***

I sit there listening to him say
*** is too much work
For whom I wonder him or me

Then he says he has to think too much
Think about what I wonder
Shouldn't it be simple

When two people feel the way we do
There should be no thinking
There should be no thoughts of work

Now I will wonder when we are together
Is he doing what comes natural
Or is he being overworked

Christine Morrone Jan 2013

Dad

When you left me that night you took part of me with you
I was always your little girl and I loved every minute of it
You are now and will always be my hero but i am so blue
My world has changed and the light in my heart is now very dim
I try to remember only the good times but all I see is you suffering

I wonder where God is and why he allows this painful end for you
I see your struggles and I pray for your last breath
I tell you to go but know in my heart I need you to stay
I hear you say you love me for the very last time
You body is still your breath is gone my world has forever changed