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Could the blurry whispers of kids
really grow into something so great?

The things I said
when a freshman
a freshman!
Armed with idealism and tough fists
but not a lot of anything else-
they shape me
like a slave whip
cutting my back and making it bleed
places I still can't go
people who I can't handle
so much

It built up
and it pours out my lips
stale and rotten
but strong woven
like a vine that rests on the bottom of the swamp
always waiting to snap
Full eighteen holes
of sheer self conscious noise
SWING-crack
plop plop
*****
I keep trying to look at the sunset
but I end up scorching my eyes instead
one of those fancy 10 word poems I see so often
I tried to write the truth
laughing folks
and kids playing far off
the ocean murmuring
wing beats
bird songs
and the roaring of fighter jets
from the nearby naval base
bit of a juxtaposition, really
hey
one went by upside down
There was a girl in
it was one of my first days when I wasn't training
and
well,
so,
Mom had been watchin TV, hunched over the couch
with a cigarette
and Baby had said hey mom
oh, Baby was what,
three?
Well,
Baby said hey mom
and Mom turned all at once and whomph
she didn't know that Baby was so close and the cigarette went
right into
her
eye.

Well, Baby's screaming, and Mom scoops her up.
Mom's first thought is that she doesn't want the apartment to burn down,
so she's stamping and then
she realizes that she hasn't stepped on anything hot.

The cigarette was in her eye.

So Mom wheels off to the hospital nearby,
and they say oh no, we can't actually do anything here
and they tell her to go to Pittsburgh
*** of Children's hospital
so now, Baby and Mom are here
and Mom looks like she's either gonna feint or throw up
(maybe both)
So Doctor A says to me
Could you come hold a baby?
and I'm like,
Well ****, that's about all I'm qualified to do right now.
So I get in there
and Baby,
Oh Baby!
She's screaming and shaking her head,
*** well, she has a cigarette in her eye
and she has her eye held open.
It hurts, but if it closes, she could do some terrible damage to her eye, and it's bad enough.

By the time that we get the cherry out, it was the size of a piece of gravel.

So I let Baby down, and she's still screaming
I want my Mom! I want my Mom!
So I go out to get Mom.
She's crying and
I'm a terrible mother
and
I couldn't be in there
Listen.
You aren't a terrible mom.
I couldn't do that.
But ***, you did the right thing.


That was my first day on the job.
My Mom tells the best stories. It is more or less the way that I learned to weave my own. Well, anyway, this is one that she just told, and it is about one of her first days at her new job. In this last year, Ma went from working retail to working as a tech in children's hospital, so there are a lot of neat things to talk about now. I edited it a little, pared it down, but I think you get the jist.
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