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Christian Dec 2010
to my tattered brothers and sisters I sing this little tune for you:

Pick up a bottle
Throw away your lives
Pitch a tent under an overpass in San Francisco.
Collect tin cans that never rust
and pick for food in garbage cans.
Talk too loud cause your used to to hum and the buzz of the engines that never quite seem to turn off.
Your white noise, your little humming butterfly.

I see hipster talking cool cat bearing fake glass wearing tight jean preaching ***** walking down old man made a big buck avenue.
Maybe I'm just jealous that my ***** die from boxer briefs n levi skinny fits with out benjamin striding along my side.

Old punk rockers tye dye bandanna wearing sweet talking hard headed mother ******* that never quite seem to die.
Keep getting laid off and job offers but no parachute, no just in cases only no replies. Name your dog's royalty, let them splash through mud, don't you care if your old woman can't dare to see the beauty in your queen's ***** getting all wet from playing with new friends. "Keep living while your young"

The smarts can't hold a job with business's that no one really cares. You live your suburban dream with Rudolf leading santa's slay with light's too bright for all your neighbors to stare. Email lists, outlook express, phones phones phones out for a contact you may never see again. Where'd the comradmanship go when working wasn't work it was fun as well.

To young ones rolling half empty water bottles down stairs, covering curious eyes with baseball caps, sneaking candy cookies cause you don't care about sugar high's or blood. Listen to your music "its good for the soul" but don't wear nice yuppie clothes to impress upon those older queers. Ice cream scoops to big to bear, make no sense to those that hear baffled cries of young mans rise, don't be afraid to be afraid. Young ***** hurt, I know.

City streets, and landfill pies, composting spoons made of tater starch, eating new foods crying old cries. Food too cold, too hot, too dry. Empanada's good, pork liver bad. These kids is cool, making something of themselves, talk to no one, no need just feel the vibe.

White walls dappled with texture, more appeasing for the eyes. A house with too many switches yet no lights, not enough lamps for more shadows and less tries. Floors don't need no wood laid out, concrete works, it's cheaper too. The house stays warm when your burning money for fire rather than cheap rides.

This is what they saw, just a new age, a new time. This is what I see, and why I sing, and why I tell you all of a decade which may never sleep enough to watch the old sun fall. Those dreams may be too real after all.
Christian Dec 2010
I hit a Jack Rabbit going sixty or seventy five,
I turned off the radio,
I was on the road for 18 hours already,
thats when shadows come alive,
I never hit anything before,
never killed anything that big.

When I was 14, I lived in Kansas, Kansas city granted,
but Kansas all the same.
We would go to my friends farm,
he owned enough guns for a small militia,
mostly shotguns.
There were 3 of us, with three scatter killing booms.
We would rake the fields to flush anything out,
crickets,
grasshoppers,
we hoped for ducks or quail
(I only pretended too, I wasn't sure then if my ***** really dropped)
and we would shoot,
Sometimes for the noise,
other times for the show.
I never killed anything.
On the way back home I saw a little chickadee perched high in a tree,
I shot,
and he fell.
"Nice one man!"
I ran over, hiding my tears, and buried him.
I got out of there as soon as I could, Kansas that is,
I was stuck at the farm.

Eight years later and I'm still not sure about my *****.
This time I didn't bury him.
I like to think it was male,
for some reason that lessens the pain.
I don't know if I crushed the life out of him quickly,
I imagine it was slow,
toturing myself with every detail as my retribution.

Made a nice thump though.
I could feel his delicate body even through the tire the shocks and the rest of the parts between me and his ****** corpse.

Softer than a speed bump.
Why did Dorothy ever go home.
Your thoughts...

the title?
Christian Dec 2010
I saw that butterfly explode,
I touched it,
I can't tell you wether it was suicide or homicide,
either way a sick grin crept along my face.

I knew I had gone crazy,
"but the crazies never know"
oh the crazies always do.

You may think it was only a butterfly,
caused by entropy,
or me,
itself.
But I'll tell you a butterfly means more than butterfly.
But I won't tell you what it means cause
I'm only talking ****.

Water bottles carry cancer,
food holds onto cancer,
we feed our livestock cancer,
we grow our fruits with cancer,
and I watch the beautiful explode.

Then again I think we should all explode a bit.
Maybe then we'd see our touch hits hard,
like mayonnaise on a mustard jar
I don't know.. ?
Christian Dec 2010
the titles the ******* poem.
Christian Dec 2010
It used to be clowns,
those painted faces
and fiery hair.
Before the age of 12,
I realized I didn't want to grow up.
The rest of the kids
wanted ****
or girlfriends
and cars.
I just wanted to play.
Middle school
High school
then college.
Then tuition.
I stopped going,
I didn't care.
The norm didn't seem normal.
Why wasn't anyone happy.
Then it was food,
then politics,
conspiracy,
***,
myself,
love.
Then it was everything.
Then it was you.
Not having you.
Its always been not knowing.
Life.
Its so scary.
Is that why we drink and smoke
and inhale and inject and huff
and spray and play video games
and watch tv?
Is that why we settle?
Why we run away?
Sometimes it feels easier to run.
But then I never want to stop.
All my fears are catching up to me.
I'm so scared.
The little boy who searched for momma's hand
when the painted faces came giggling with
swirling eyes and demonic noses.
Momma come save me one more time.
Momma come save us all.
Sorry baby boy,
Momma ain't home no more.
Christian Dec 2010
a boys body needs no added stimuli,
karma sutra books
in the back of the barns and the nobles
have real pictures too.
these lil boys fall in love with pretty girls,
they tell them what they think they feel,
they feel what makes them think.
I heard once that a man only has enough
blood for one of his two heads.
To the pretty girls,
forgive these misguided boys,
their foolish words,
their hurtful lies,
they never understood the difference of love,
and a *******.
Cause once they get soft,
they'll realize which head was thinking,
then they'll hear which head was talking.
You might see a slight terror in their eyes,
maybe they'll act different.
As much as they'd like to say
"I'm sorry, I got *****"
they know they can't, granted,
us boys don't know much.
Yet *******,
is a hairy deed,
and we don't want our eyes to fall out.
Our fingers are only so fun for the first few years
of self discovery,
and then, call it man's nature, we get greedy,
we want more.
The subtle touch of a girls embrace,
white thighs exposed
criss corssing between our own criss crossed legs.
We also like the warmth
and the thump thump thump of a beating heart
against our ears.
We like the smell,
the salt
and the cries of any great sea.
Scream to us,
let us know we aren't demons
squeezing between the floor boards
for a wet ***** and a few moans,
we boys are lovers too.
Teach us how,
you don't always have to say no.
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