Excitement had built inside
The day I flew so high
But now I’m left asking: why?

I flew to the heavens all I saw was clear blue sky
Mommy why did you lie
Why won’t you tell me where we go when we die?
I promise I’ll be strong, I won’t cry

Do you even know?
In death where do we go?
Do we fade to memory, just an echo?
Tell me we don’t just rot in the ground below
Do I come back, another chance to grow?
Oh where is the proof, where are the signs to follow
Oh please tell me, show me where to go

I flew to the heavens all I saw was clear blue sky
Mommy why did you lie
Why won’t you tell me where we go when we die?
I promise I’ll be strong, I won’t cry

I don’t want to waste my only chance
So tell me if this is it, is this all I get
Will I live on after my mistakes, and regret?
Have I lived before, did I somehow forget?

So many questions, the clock is ticking
Will I live a life wasted, wondering
Will my death result in knowing
Or will it be a definitive ending

Is the truth simpler then the question
Are we fools blinded by anticipation?
Is the pool of life’s secrets shallow?
Is it just too hard to swallow?

I flew to the heavens all I saw was clear blue sky
Mommy why did you lie
Why won’t you tell me where we go when we die?
I promise I’ll be strong, I won’t cry

Oh please someone enlighten me
Show me the light, guide me
Will I live for an eternity?
Or is this life everything
Can’t go on wondering
Can’t let this all end without knowing
Please clear the haze
Does my soul live for evermore
Or should I start to count the days
Just how fast must I explore

Hiding behind
A Forever changing face
Hidden within
A shifting heart
Change tearing a head apart

There’s a man under this cloak
Thru the layer unable to see
Lost doesn’t know how to be
Can’t fight his way thru destiny

And
This world starts slipping
Down time it’s tumbling
From the core this cloak is burning
This interior starts showing
Thru this void the fears sink in

A mind so busy inside
This man with no Identity
Slowly falling out of sanity
All his costumes empty

One soul searching for direction
Has let a life pass by
Stuck in the sands of confusion
This time there is no lie
No shelter in which to hide

And
This world starts slipping
Down time it’s tumbling
From the core his cloak is burning
This interior starts showing
Thru this void the fears sink in

Vision filling into a blur
Coming from the truth
Tears flow thru the paint
Canvas bare, shows its scars
This armor was false
Just a show for the strong

Defenseless wondering the emptiness
With no shell it all floods in
Swept away, into this unknown

This world starts slipping
Down time it’s tumbling
From the core his cloak is burning
This interior starts showing
Thru this void the fears sink in

It’s been said a million times
Been thrown into a hundred rhymes
Still no one accepts the trend
No one wants to believe
That every good thing comes to an end
Walking away I tried to pretend
Make myself believe that this was a not conclusion
Miles away trying to think of the distance as illusion
But every inch I stray my heart feels de division

Leaving I’m going a thousand miles away
With every mile comes a new reason to stay
Wondering if it was worth parting with yesterday
I only wish there was another way
Because I’m a thousand reasons from you today

The nights spent dreaming
The days spent wondering
What could have been?
Some choices you just can’t win
Left the questions itching beneath the skin
And the memories spinning from within

Even in this new world so small
When miles can disappear in a phone call
With all the connections I still feel a wall
On the other side who will catch you if you fall
I wish my arms could reach around to you
Cause I’m hurting and I know you are to

Leaving I’m going a thousand miles away
With every mile comes a new reason to stay
Wondering if it was worth parting with yesterday
I only wish there was another way
Because I’m a thousand reasons from you today

So far away can’t help but ponder
If I’m not around will you remember?
As time goes by it seems I drift further
Emptiness has taken the place of all the little wonders
Insecurities are creeping in closer
Your words have lost there weight
It doesn’t seem hard to believe that you couldn’t wait
Trust falls into thoughts of betrayal
Already excepting what I knew to fail

Pleading for trust to return
A faith over distance will burn
With separation betrayal is all I learn
Left behind your left to yearn
Far away you don’t want to lose
The past isn’t a path to chose
Miles have stolen your man
All because of a choice you don’t understand
Loneliness isn’t helping you stand
Stretched to our limit, have we seen our last grain of sand?

Living, I’m parting with the past
Every minute comes a new reason to make it last
But there’s no way to turn back
I only wish I could live with that fact
Because we’re a thousand reasons apart today

Lock all the doors
Throw yourself on the floor
The devils coming, coming for more
Seeking the screams he adores

There was a time when all was good
He cherished you and forever would
Vow that carried with them unseen rage
Love faded and the doors opened to its cage

Pounding, the door is shaking
Trembling, there no escaping
Screaming, why is no one coming?
In this alone, no one helping

In his eyes fires burning
In his mind nothing but anger
You’re grateful he’s not a father
Save innocent souls from the terror

So blinded by unconditional love
So mislead by misplaced hope
So hurt by the painful reality
Yet can’t hate what you love so deeply

Why did no one warn you?
Someone could’ve offered a hint
God could’ve given you a clue
That his love was faded with an evil tint

So easy can the heart betray
When you let reasoning decay
Opening your heart and soul yesterday
Closing your eyes and door today

Nothing will stop this pain
Until you break free from this chain
Cut your heart and his soul, and wait for the rain
To wash the guilt away, the tyrant has been slain

Fearing the same faith as before
You will never find the cure
Forever insecure, always unsure
Never will you relive a love so pure

The world looks different thru these eyes
In my mind all is darker, brighter
Shadows emptier, colors fuller
Nothing is ordinary in this bright night
Living in the sun’s shadow I don’t understand
How can simplicity be so confusing?

Surrounded by everyone
With no one beside me
Alone in the middle of nowhere
With everyone around me
Loneliness in my friendships
A friendship with loneliness
Deafening noise in silence
Finding tranquility in a riot

These aren’t my eyes, this isn’t my life
What is this darkness surfacing?
What is this light so blinding?
No control in a war, of shadows and stars
Two sides dwell within
Walking the same path to a different end

A paradox in every thought
With every step a different direction
With every breath a different opinion
A broken image in an unbroken mirror
An insanity driving me insane

Standing alone in the dark of night
A soul at rest no confusion no fight
Only flesh and bone no shadow no light
A comfortable emptiness that feels so right

No matter how many stars the shadows remain
Only in the death of one will the other perish
A fact I now understand, my fate is in my hands
Today I stand alone, about to walk down my own road

Trying to be greater then life
Leaving all I had behind me
Leaving friends in the dust to make new ones
But eventually ill go unnoticed

Living behind a glass wall
Can see all I want but can get there
Fall back in pain, trying to crash through
On my feet again with no lesson learned

Trying to forget problems I had
Creating more problems as a result
More to forget, more to deal with
One problem became a life of problems

Digging a hole of denial
Were lies are my shovel
And only the truth can be my latter
Deeper, I’m going to where I belong

Living behind a glass wall
Can see all I want but can get there
Fall back in pain, trying to crash through
On my feet again with no lesson learned

Suicide, drugs, alcohol not the answer
The answer is just beyond my fingers
  In my eyes I see it all have it but me
For it is love of another one

Every one has someone but me
Is it because I try to hard
No it can’t be I gave up too much
Maybe that’s the problem

Have I given up all for nothing?
All that was for the nothing that is
Looked down to many
As they were looking down to me

Living behind a glass wall
Can see all I want but can’t get there
Fall back in pain, trying to crash through
On my feet again with a lesson learned
……
This time I venture a look behind me and I see all that I ever needed