Everybody pushed me away from you.
Told me you were wrong, you pulled me down,
that before you I was a brighter spirit.
Everyone said you were my first love-
you meant so much because nobody else
had ever meant anything.
Everything inside of me felt torn-
I didn't know when it happened
but I lost myself in you.
And everybody that pushed me away,
they were right,
I never wanted to hear it,
but you weren't man enough to hold me tight.
I've lost sleep, thinking I made a mistake
but you couldn't give me the love
I so badly needed to take.



Every night I waited to feel alive again,
Til the night that I met him.

Lies unwind truths,
with flawless promises-
never knowing
the difference.
something replaced my
sixth sense,
maybe my fear
of everything
that shines.

youre the party to my lounge,
the disco to my trip,
without that kiss would i have fallen?
this poem doesn't rhyme so you won't like it,
but ive written it anyway.

With forgiveness, should come clarity..
without love, what are we?

oh cigarrette i love you so
out of my mouth the smoke i blow
i love when you get that red glow
instead of shrinking i wish you would grow

Jumping at your convulsions,
Finding everything you'd want
and nothing you need.
Collecting myself and falling apart
become interchangeable.  
At your weakest, I'm afraid
I wont see you again.
The stoop catches my tears,
and I hear an ambulance
speed through a small town.
Don't you let her go
you slow professionals.
She needs me- but I'm helpless,
and it's only hurting her, help her,
don't comfort me.
Life feels surreal when
you sit and wonder how you'll die.
They help you in, and your eyes open.
I thank the God that I doubt everyday.