There's one true thing I'd like to say:
that everything is fake today.

It doesn't matter where you look:
fake film, fake magazine, fake book.

The world around is upside-down:
fake motorway, fake house, fake town.

Look right and everything's a lie:
fake earth, fake trees, fake sea, fake sky,

fake hair, fake smile, fake skin, fake tan,
fake babe, fake child, fake girl, fake man,

fake bus, fake car, fake church, fake pews,
fake Christianity, fake Jews,

fake Sikhs, fake Buddhists, fake Hindus,
fake art, fake poetry, fake muse,

fake drill, fake tools, fake nails, fake screws,
fake knife, fake cut, fake pain, fake bruise,

fake train, fake plane, fake park, fake loos,
fake shop, fake pub, fake food, fake *****,

fake speech, fake face, fake interviews,
fake poll, fake vote, fake win, fake lose.

fake talk, fake thought, fake voice, fake views,
fake fame, fake truth, fake fake, fake news,

fake Washington, fake people resident,
fake flag, fake USA, fake president.

When cars breakdown the AA man
Can get them all to start.
You tell me this is practical,
but tell me is it Art?

You tell me you've a water wheel
And drive a horse and cart.
All this is self-sufficiency,
but tell me is it Art?

You tell me as we dine tonight
(and order à la carte)
that here the food is excellent,
but tell me is it Art?

You tell me that you love me and
you vow we'll never part,
and this no doubt is love alright,
but tell me is it Art?

You tell me you're a guru and
you promise to impart
the secret of the universe,
but tell me is it Art?

For I'm an artist, I perform:
I ***** belch and ****.
Since I'm an artist you can tell
that what I do is Art.