My heart beats so hard just thinking of you.
Of us.
Of what we had.

Its like it's screaming for you in the dark,
So loudly I can't sleep.

If you even realized how much you meant,
You would run from me,
Like you already have.

I know my worth.
But you don't.
And it makes these nights so much harder.

I keep begging myself to let this go,
But I just can't.
Moments like that just dont fade.

I wish they did.
Because then I would stop looking at you,
Like i've lost something important.

I wish I had the confidence to be more than just a person.
More than just someone who floats among the crowd.
Someone who laughs more, who sings louder, who doesn't care.
But if that were true than who would I be?
Not me.

So i'll become just another ghost.
I'll be mellow and i'll blend in,
I'll care far too much.

Stay up all night writing poetry,
and having my bestfriend say "That's sad and beautiful."
Something I am, and what I long to be.