mother problems
chicken pox
asked my aunt
she replied
shower my mother with love and care
after many tries
chicken pox
appointment to the end
of chicken pox
sent my mother a message that she wasn’t okay
drowsy drowsy
medicines
drowsy
shouts and screams
a clueless father
a I-dont-give-two-*******-***** sister
exams over
results out
failed my favourite subject
HOW DID I FAIL LITERATURE
chicken pox doctor
misdiagnosis
then gave me wrong number of weeks to rest
choreography for bollywood
tamil folk
parents were showering ill concealed parental
concern
went to support
ran ran ran
confused and nervous
of the entire world hating me
i ran. ran. i ******* ran
wash the dishes
cooked **** - got scolded for not cooking
extremely ***-y father
why the ******* hell did that happen
cooked
messed up dishes
ate dinner outside
whole family sick
syf prac horrendous
out of breath
trying to run
dinner outside everyday
people who didnt listen
people who didnt care about the dance
time limit
one week before kanal
havent finished choreography
CHICKEN ****** POX
came back to school
parents being ***
whole family down with chicken pox
mother working her *** off
she doesnt want any help
dancing dancing dancing  
mother’s talk about me trying to get away from dance
raffles diploma
performance
november performance
i couldnt dance
kicked out ruthlessly
kanal
five minutes before
a message no more such activities next year
marche dinner
screamed and screamed
out of breath
******* hole in my throat
ran ran ran ran ran
away from idiosyncrasies
raffles diploma
career choices
out of money
where did all the money go
where did all the money go
goals
fashion designer
parents : banker, scientist
work backwards from the goal
dance i want to dance
outings
2 days before
go on to khan academy
father only listens to himself
crushed bones
crushed ribcages
i cant breathe
still running

remember the times
I thought I was black and white as this page
My poems were out to represent
this black and white
and soon enough
this black and white starts to fade
with time everything starts to fade
once it had faded into the black and white
on this page
like this page
now it seems against the page
it fades into
more and more colors
the world's seems to be more than just
black and white
like on this page.

Holed up in a bed
With a few blankets
A running nose
Temperature as hot as a fire
Poor throat, my poor throat
Letting lose of the dust at its base
A running nose
A blocked nose
Hidden ears
burning forehead
sick.

Had a way with words
Had a way with these many letters
All scrunched together
Scrambled to the edges that hold them together
I don't know what I'm writing
Don't care enough to know
that I am writing.
Confusion and confusion
beguiles me
as I scrunch and scramble more words.

chilled to the core of the bone
with a myriad snowflakes
and beautiful beautiful shaven ice
around me
falling through my tousled hair
all bathing in the sun's glory
Wish I could be there.

people around me
are
over-achievers
all cut from the same cloth
OVER ACHIEVERS
people leading groups of people
getting As
involved in a million different things
and I sit here
with just one thing
and that one thing isn't even complete.

the body, a cage
myriad of feelings
craving to be let out

Hush, little child, stay right in there
You don't deserve to be let out

the body,
holding for the litany of plain actions
every single day

the body,
God is in it,
heaven?
hell?
what is this

the body,
a circus act
standing on a thin rope
ready to tilt and fall

a lifeless body
with a lifeless heart
sits there
awaiting the cold,cruel stab
to the heart