I got drunk
Not because I wanted to forget
Not to help me fall asleep
Not so I could lose my inhibitions
But to feel a little dizzy
So I could stumble around my room
Like I did as a child
After spinning in circles for hours on end.

The one by that always-busy movie theater
In the parking lot where you picked me up
On our first date
Because we had met online
And you could've been a serial killer.

The one we ventured into as part of
Our many-adventure date that consisted
Of awkward conversation
And driving to various locations
Most people don't typically go on dates to.

The one your car was parked in front of
When we made out in your front seat
Until my mom came
Because I didn't have my license
And you were too enthralled by me to care.

I think you said it was your grandma's
Which made sense to me
Because it looked
Like a grandma sort-of car.

But you opened the passenger door
All gentleman-like
And it smelled
Like it belonged to a teenage boy.

A hygienic teenage boy, of course,
With gorgeous eyes.
And you seemed
Like a boy I could fall in love with.

If I could do one thing for you
It would be to make you know--yes,
Make you--
Know how incredibly wonderful you are.

He once said to me,
"You are the most beautiful girl I have ever met."
And I believed him
Because he grew up in some middle-of-
Nowhere town in Kansas.

The faint indentation you left yearns for your body
As I do.

The scent of your being has faded
And it yearns for that too.

The warmth of your presence is only a memory
But it yearns for that once-reality.



My bed hasn't been the same since you've been away.