Residing in a slum of fear
Nightmares of succumbing to reality's gravity
fumbling over

Wondering in dreams I once plundered with
Thinking of the insufficient number of "I love yous" exchanged for your brutal remarks
Recounting each moment where you came first and I went last
That's all I have left of our past

They say its okay, that it'll never hurt
They say just know your limits
Don't get caught in between the dream of a nonexistent reality

Complicated is an understatement
Nonexistent is simply too harsh

If it never existed how can you crave it
If it never walked up to and acknowledged you presence
                                                                                       how can you greet it
A complicated nonexistent envy of love

A tear here a tear there
What if I made the wrong decision?
He told me it was love
HE promised never to hurt
He told me a lot of things
Which ones Are true, I don't Know

I wanted to be her
I envied your dedication
The two of you so compatible
Yet we're simply complex
I will never be the stream running through those veins
The rhythmic beat of a heart that forces a smile of perfection across your face
I wonder do I make you as happy as the one who breeds your kin
A sad disfunction
A game I'm a afraid I will never win
I want to feel the beat of your heart flow through my vains
Then maybe just maybe it will be the music in my ear that gives comfort when it rains
I wanted to be her
A pattern in your soul
A continious reminder that we too could get through the bad days
I wanted to be her
But I realized my aspiration were simply too high