Ah, there she is
Do you see her?
Yes, her
Eyes soft,
like morning dew
Inviting smile,
like a summer morning
"Who is she?"
...If only I knew

"Goodbye, I guess..." :
The last words I spoke to you
and I saw that look in your eyes
like you weren't able to understand
what was going on.
Like you were Tod and I was Widow Tweed
in that scene you loved but I hated
because I couldn't handle the pain in those fox eyes.
(Goodbye may seem forever,
Farewell is like the end)
I felt our connection fray
and I was no longer grasping at threads,
trying to keep us together like I said I always would.
I'm sorry I broke my promise
but you broke a hundred of yours first.
I jogged away, hoping the momentum
would keep me together for a little while longer.
Still, my heart resisted, begging to go back
and I compromised, glancing to where you were
only to see empty space on a forever haunted sidewalk.
(But in my heart's a memory
and, there, you'll always be)

My shoulders aren't strong enough
to carry all your emotional baggage.
They are weak.
It's been a long journey and
I haven't even crossed the half-way point.
I am not a mule.

My heart does not have enough empty space
to store your repression and sadness.
It is small.
Last year was hard and
A harder one has already begun.
I am not a locker.

My eyes don't have an endless amount
of tears to spare for your sob stories.
They are tired.
These eyelids are heavy, but
They will not close until it's time to rest.
I am not a fountain.

My ears are far too sorely over-sensitive
to suffer through your shouts.
They are in pain.
They've heard enough of mine and
They will endure many more.
I am not  the void.

My mind is simple in a way that won't let it
sift through and solve your issues.
It is strained.
The last few problems have been hard and
The most recent is seemingly unsolvable.
I am not your therapist.

My shoulders are wide
My heart is open
My eyes are gentle
My ears are accepting
My mind is alert

I know I am the easy choice.
I am the easy choice
when you just need someone.
I want to help.
I swear I do.
But I am worn down to my core
and the wind is chilling.

People seem to believe that I am a terribly angry person
That I'm never quite satisfied with anything
As if I'm a volcano constantly edging on near eruption
I admit, this isn't entirely untrue
I am filled to the brim with red-hot lava
I am burning with the intensity for a better life
But, what many haven't realized is I'm not all that angry
The world sets me off at times, but it's not the real problem
In the same way that global warming can't be blamed on the sun
There is an anger within me
A rage fueled by my own shortcomings
I can't really rant about myself though, can I?
So, everyone and everything else has become my punching bag

Like a stale cup of joe
and cigarette smoke
Like endlessly writing
and saying nothing
Like crying for no reason
to match the rainy season
Like the void is too strong
and I'm barely holding on

When you die, I promise to care
I'll remember how you were before
And forget when you weren't there

I'll speak of those summers past
Our smiles and laughter
"Oh, how those days went too fast!"

Recall the life we so adored
Relive those memories one more time
Then finally close the door

Dear, mother, I swear to you this
If only you promise to sleep in bliss

I feel as though I am stuck in the purgatory of my life
It's my own fault, I know
The rain pours and I just wait for someone to show me the light

My bones ache
I'm soaked to my core
The emptiness in my soul is drowning and, still, I wait

Doing anything is becoming more and more difficult by the day
My existence is getting heavier, but lighter
I fear that I will soon spill everything and float away