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Calli Kirra Feb 2014
Zeros and ones
Zeros
And ones
Vibrate, vibrations
My colossal,
Speck of isles and nations
Half step, half of half step
Never the wall, can't feel it yet
Am I?
Tying... no
Am I tying my own knot?
Not?
299 · Mar 2014
Buzz
Calli Kirra Mar 2014
These bees
And this ink machine
Rumbling,
And the rattle never comes
But I wait for it
Come cut the gray screen from me,
The prettiest scissors I've ever seen
But oh, the bees
They, yes, rumble me
"You're okay,"
I hope today's the day
But my LA is full of rain
And so is its gold girl,
It's scene
It's party queen
292 · Nov 2013
Every Time
Calli Kirra Nov 2013
Well just shut up
And close the door
I'm sober enough to know
You're never around anymore
"It's all in your head"
That's the problem, man
"Every time I look for you,
The sun goes down."
291 · Oct 2013
Entry #2
Calli Kirra Oct 2013
I never sleep anymore
That's the price I paid for you
And I keep playing air guitar
I need to find something to do
290 · May 2015
M Part Whatever
Calli Kirra May 2015
You said everything I waited for
Oh, but a couple ages too late
Well I've never doubted your love for me
Just the time it took to say
289 · May 2016
Apartment Heart
Calli Kirra May 2016
Im trying to figure out if I'll ever feel as raw with anyone as I did with him. Even now, I'm so happy, and treated so well, and I'm attracted and immersed and even growing attached, but I've yet to feel the ache. I don't feel moved like the turning tide like how he made me. I'm not turned inside out, but I'm wondering if that's okay, if that's a good thing, if I've just never known peacefully pure love and I'm just used to being torn apart and confused and on fire with inconsistency. Part of me misses that, part of me says that when I feel the rolling drop again is when I will again know love, but I can't trust that as the honest truth.

Maybe real love is not splattered all over the walls. Maybe it is soft orange, glowing and caressing the ceiling, the floors, the window. Maybe it's different with every two individual people, like different colors make their own colors in turn.
I'm just always stuck in the middle, feeling like I know and feeling like I don't. Knowing... do you really know when you know? It's like I have five fragments of heart and they all want something different. There I go again, talking, talking.
289 · Nov 2013
fridaynightlights
Calli Kirra Nov 2013
Bright lights and butterflies,
Lets drink to my demise
I found you just in time
To save my life
I found you just in time
To save my Friday night
288 · Nov 2022
Aurora
Calli Kirra Nov 2022
Hands swift, taught, carving.
Aurora borealis on my open back
Thought we might name our girl the same
Crashing into the world with your eyes
Flashing green
Loud, humanly
Through our chests and the sky

All of the rivers that led us here
Began clear
We knew our way like our tongues know our teeth
Like losing a soul tears the muscle
Before it leaves
284 · Aug 2015
Want Me
Calli Kirra Aug 2015
I don't have time like a clock does
I'll tick you around till your heart stops
He said put down the scissors,
All I said was I miss her,
Oh, you better not
And you better stop
I needed to chill,
And I've done a good job
I'm so ******* sweet
And you're stupid, it seems
Like with me, you dream
You wake up and push your luck
282 · Jun 2014
Song Bird
Calli Kirra Jun 2014
Bad writing,
Big words
Sounds so good when spoken to a sheep herd
Oh,
How I hope to find a song bird
281 · Feb 2018
So Very So
Calli Kirra Feb 2018
The crushing weight
Of a silent fate
That I could feel rolling in like the tide
We went down in flames,
Throwing punches at the rain,
As it soaked us one drop at a time
We touched like a flash in the pan
Burning the skin on my hands
Smoke too thick to see
What was it all for?
I keep thinking, had we locked the door
Maybe I’d still feel you all over me
279 · Nov 2014
The Life
Calli Kirra Nov 2014
I'm prepared to give it all up
Prepared to fall into the lights and cars,
I'm ready for the constant go and the moving home,
For a nomadic soul
I'm ready to see my own eyes everywhere but in mirrors
I'm ready to let it have me
277 · Apr 2013
King of Clubs
Calli Kirra Apr 2013
Wanna be chill
Like a cool lake that's melted
Into you
I wanna go up up up
And stay there
And hear your voice all around me
So teenage
He's the king in the clouds
I'm his faithful queen
Of the stars
He is light and I am dark
He allows me to see
And I bring him back down
To earth
277 · Jan 2014
I DON'T KNOW
Calli Kirra Jan 2014
seriously **** this
I HATE this
277 · Nov 2013
Luvyou
Calli Kirra Nov 2013
Ill never see you
Cause we'll both be on stage
Xo
274 · May 2021
Hail
Calli Kirra May 2021
I try to speak our language with other people
I can almost hear you laughing at me

It sounds like hail on a windshield
270 · Nov 2013
M pt 5
Calli Kirra Nov 2013
I will write
For every time
You cracked your whip
On my dancers back
And I will sigh
For every night
I heard something I shouldn't
270 · Oct 2014
Rock Shot
Calli Kirra Oct 2014
All the girls,
Wearing the same skirt
Tugging at your shirt
It feels good with the black and the lights
Grind your teeth, closing eyes
Red heels won't touch you like I could
And she don't listen to the songs we would
I love seeing the candy dance in your eyes
Oh I love the fever in your sighs
So much for such a young guy
Such a crazy time
Wild ******* ride
Kiss the salt and taste the lime
There's plenty of room for yours and mine
It'll come
So much fun
269 · Dec 2022
The Animal in Me For You
Calli Kirra Dec 2022
It is scrawny and starving
Kicking at its gate, gnashing it’s jaws at my hands and throat
Bleeding through the chains and hay
Collapsing only to wail through the roof and into the sky

I sit at the barn door and sob

But I love you,
So I don’t feed it and I watch it die.
268 · Feb 2014
Baby please answer
Calli Kirra Feb 2014
Eyeeeee
Kneeeddddd
Yooooooo
267 · Dec 2021
His Armor
Calli Kirra Dec 2021
He rides in loudly, and all at once
Like a hurricane healed to summer air
I have never been more grateful for the violence
I’m barely awake,
I haven’t yet popped my arms and legs back into place
But when coming from his mouth,
I am made of marble,
I was never truly bent nor asleep  

I will never have anything better to do
Than watch as you lock into your armor
Cradling, for the needy day,
That which you have given to only me
266 · Apr 2014
Girls Like Boys
Calli Kirra Apr 2014
For a girl with a dress sewn of guns,
Flashing lights in the night are much fun
And to a boy flown in from such a cold state,
She looks of a Bonnie on the run
She's hazy and he's dazing in her tan skin,
He'll fire up, she'll go right up n kiss him
She's always got one more,
He's got his cell and a board
Tonight lets find a room to play house in
266 · Jun 2018
Carolina Herrera 212
Calli Kirra Jun 2018
Drinking gin in the park
You look at me
And you’re every single stop, long pause, start
You’re everything that sets a jump in my heart
Everything I want to breathe in
You are mid August
On the backs of my legs
The smell on my hair,
It gives away that I’ve been
Curled into your chest,
My face in your neck,
Pleading for you to stay
Praying to a righteous God
That for us,
It’s just another Thursday
Another fragmented love letter.
264 · Dec 2013
Z pt 2
Calli Kirra Dec 2013
Wow
Friends
She dressed up
And I didn't
"I'm mad about a lot of things"
I thought about five
He can't be what you need
If he's eighteen
263 · Aug 2023
Sand
Calli Kirra Aug 2023
Would it be too much to take a sip from your stars,
Uncover the man left staring blank into the crowded yard
And your apology was quick and nimble
I had planned to meet you there
In the sand
263 · Jan 2023
A Discovery
Calli Kirra Jan 2023
I watched you eat chocolate for breakfast in your work pants
Your tired pink turning everything that was green into blue
You will discover infinite things before I do and so I get to live one and a half days extra on top of each one given to me
I feel like an eternal castle bell
I must be so because you explain me like a ringing in your skull and just as liquid gold
So liquid that sometimes our disagreeing sunsets are worth hearing your voice for so long
You describe plastering a wall
I hear that there has been discovered a new section of Earth
263 · Jul 2014
What I Want
Calli Kirra Jul 2014
I answer to the moon and the rain and my pacts with myself
Not to you or him or anyone else
263 · Apr 2013
Seventeen
Calli Kirra Apr 2013
You made me a woman
On the second of December
You didn't let me smoke
You wanted me to feel
You
Jon saw you kiss me
Like you wanted him to see us
You don't think
Of how you were the first one
To touch me
And make my toes curl
It was your birthday present first
But turned into a present for me
259 · Mar 2021
Golden Yellow
Calli Kirra Mar 2021
I could’ve used your hands today
I was drowning in a pool of eyes
Paper thin and soaked through
With your hands held about my face,
I would have found new air in you
With your voice through a tiny tin wire
I could’ve opened up and fallen into

My soul would have been loved
And already resold
For your warm “they’re nothing like us.”
“Lover, let them wilt in the drizzle and drown,
I’m the rows of corn that feed the world,
And you’re the Sun.”
259 · Jan 2014
Flowers
Calli Kirra Jan 2014
Yeah, whatever
Of course you don't remember

I'm still the one you call when you're drunk and just rolled a blunt, so, who's really got it bad?
257 · Oct 2013
Bad Poet
Calli Kirra Oct 2013
The worst fear of a poet
Is that the reader will not understand
And I am terrified
257 · Mar 2021
Light Blue Dream
Calli Kirra Mar 2021
Are you my kiss behind a studio door?
My costar in our own little story,
Whispered between the rest of them
As we sneak away into the bright city chill
Just after mid-morning,
The very highest of the Sun
Are you the radio tuned to the perfect distraction?
I know music rushes in rivers beneath you
Swelling,
It collects in the windows of your vision
Aquamarine, polished,
Are they hard enough to deliciously shatter my heart?
Is it me with whom your growing vines bloom into,
As we play different parts?
I’d leave it where it all began,
Once the end has come  
Alone, on a glossy wooden floor
I’d trust you with my secret
If it was also yours
C.T. (2021)
256 · Feb 2014
Yaya
Calli Kirra Feb 2014
*******, punk isn't dead
255 · Jul 2014
Reed
Calli Kirra Jul 2014
"Where the **** are we?"
254 · Dec 2013
M pt 5
Calli Kirra Dec 2013
I need you
253 · Oct 2014
Just short, sweet
Calli Kirra Oct 2014
In the air, on a jet
Seventeen straight hours
Oh what a perfect number
Just working so hard,
Oh baby you are
You gotta know we're crazy for ya
253 · Jan 2014
Hand over mouth
Calli Kirra Jan 2014
"And if I didn't love you then I love you now
But it's easy to love something when there's pain in its eyes"
please choose Blake
Please choose Blake
Not Z
Please
251 · Sep 2018
The Beauty in Breaking Down
Calli Kirra Sep 2018
The beauty in breaking down
Is how we fall apart to maybe finally stand
I set the house aflame just to keep us warm,
Broke all the glass panes in the unlocked door  
Opened my sword case in vain
It’s only a weapon if it can hurt you,
And I bruise from the pouring rain
Though I couldn’t go on like this another single day,
What I would do
To be your exception again
250 · Jan 2014
Last One
Calli Kirra Jan 2014
It will be okay
We will be okay
Love her,
And remember
And sing forever
I love you
I will see you soon
246 · Nov 2017
Scales of Gray
Calli Kirra Nov 2017
Wide eyed
Baby gray-blues
Blue shirt,
Blue soul too
And I ask myself every time
I made it clear, showed up both nights
And you're sick with something you can't quite touch
Maybe your throat is just rough,
Maybe you're still in love
245 · May 2014
Forgiveness&Love
Calli Kirra May 2014
Everyone has a love
You have love,
Just, it's okay, forgive and love
That's what I tell myself
Anyway,
It's true, I do
I love you and you and you
And I forgive you and you too
I'm blending roses from blue
244 · Dec 2013
She Don't Know
Calli Kirra Dec 2013
I asked him if he cares
He asked me what I said
I wonder if he'll ever start putting sheets on his bed
Ripping up my clothes never felt so good
And a million bucks says
She'll never know
242 · Sep 2018
Ash(e)s
Calli Kirra Sep 2018
“Think about that.”
Why don’t you think about the nights you’ll spend
Wishing you’d chosen different words
Me, I’ll be radiant and walking in the sun
And you’ll feel the weight of the tended soil you torched to ash
Before the roses bloomed
240 · Dec 2013
M pt 6
Calli Kirra Dec 2013
"He just kept putting me up and putting me down, and at some point I just got tired and numb, so I... lied down for awhile"
239 · Jun 2018
Greenest
Calli Kirra Jun 2018
So used to wasting water,
Letting it fall and slide between my fingers
And you,
You pull me softly down like a glittering river
Like getting lost in a story or a dream
That could surely last forever
Here I am just soaking wet
Clothes heavy and dripping on the tile floor,
Reaching down,
Begging to join yours
You, staring into me
With the greenest things I’ve ever seen
Spreading out until they’re everything
239 · Jun 2022
Bleed You
Calli Kirra Jun 2022
I regret you fully and to the very soul
234 · May 2014
F&F
Calli Kirra May 2014
F&F
I'm so sixteen
If you know what I mean
Too tired to forgive but I'll forget
228 · Feb 2014
All We Wanna Do
Calli Kirra Feb 2014
All I wanna do
All he wanna do
All she wanna do
How much can you do
220 · Nov 2018
The Weight of Jade
Calli Kirra Nov 2018
Weak as a a ten ton weight on a wire for you
My knees just buckle,
Yours give too
We listen to rock music under the orange moon
Then some acoustic
Some rhythm n blues
The stormy fade
Over your gorgeous, angry face
You’re a heavenly tumbling sky
I’m washed clean in your rain
Electric guitars
A few more bars
All leather, metal and jade
216 · Sep 2013
Come Here
Calli Kirra Sep 2013
Babyiloveyouandbabyimsorryitdoesnthavetobesohardwedonthavetofight­andbemadandsaythingstoourfriendsandfuckthisupwecanbehappyandhigha­ndinlovebelievemewhenIsayIloveyoumorethanthemoonandipromiseillmak­eyouproud.wecouldbesohappyicouldmakeyoufeelsoinsaneandamazingjust­letmeshowyou
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