You saw my heart,
Through a growing,
Haze of lies.
You heard the break,
In my  laugh.
Saw the cracks,
In my smile.
But I guess
It doesn't matter
Anymore
Because apparently
You didn't care enough
To fix me.

Into a dark void I fall,
Cold, dark and damp.
The air is surrounding me.
Suffocating me.
No one reaches out,
To catch me,
And free me from this,
Strangling abyss.
I don't care anymore.
I'll just slip into ,
A deep trance,
Until i hit the firm ground,
At the bottom of this,
Never-ending hole.

There will be a point,
When you just want to stop,
And go back in time,
To try to make things normal.
But there is no description of normal.
It is only what we think normal is.
What if it’s sitting completely still?
Staring straight ahead,
And being absolutely silent.
Never moving,
Never breathing,
And never making a sound?
What if it’s running till you get there,
And screaming I’m here?
Only to find yourself,
Alone in a place no one understands?
What if it’s not the place you began,
But somewhere entirely different?
In someone else’s mind,
And not anywhere near your normal?

The wind blows the grass,
Ever so gently.
The clouds move,
Through the sky,
Ever so gracefully.
I lay on the ground,
Surrounded by all,
Of the flowers and weeds,
That I can imagine.
Suddenly the field fades,
Into a desert.
I'm buried in sand,
About to be eaten alive,
By the cannibalistic scorpions.
But then I'm in the ocean,
Drowning in the whirlpools,
Flailing my arm for my life.
I step onto the dry ground,
At the bottom of the ocean.
The water is still,
And not moving.
A hole appears,
And I fall into,
A dark void,
Filled with stars,
That blind my eyes.
I realized that,
I wasn't breathing.
I tried to breath in,
But i was only breathing out.
I see the planets,
Suffocating I struggle,
Towards the nearest one.
It looked like Earth,
But somehow,
I wasn't quite sure.
My eyes close as I,
Go through the layers,
Of the atmosphere.
When I opened them again,
I was laying on a bed,
Surrounded by my family.
At first I was relieved,
But then I saw,
This evil looks on their faces.
One of them smiled,
And I could see,
Their sharp, bloodstained teeth.
Closed my eyes,
Screaming each of their names.
Then I opened them again,
Still screaming,
And I realized,
It was only,
A dream.

I am confused.
What am I supposed to be?
Am I this empty shell hiding in the sea?
Or am I a monstrous beast that’s,
Hiding in some kind of cave.
I don’t know what I feel anymore.
I used to feel sadness, pain, and loneliness.  
Now I feel nothing.
I’m always cold, but I feel nothing else.
No one can hurt me because I have no heart.
Again, I am confused
What am I?


Author's Note.
This is the very first poem i wrote when i was about 9, i think. Well hope you liked it!! :)