The weak sun on my face
mirrors my hearts joy.
The lack of warmth,
the absence of your light.

Suddenly, this is hurting me.

My capacity for pain
lessens day by day.
This lack of love
erodes the sense of self.

I'm losing against these waves.

Despair , loneliness,
the emptiness inside me
filled with the still black
pool of tenebrous rage.

Why don't you love me?
Why don't you want me?

Returning to ink
and parchment
long absence and dissent
fuelled by unwillingness to think.

Crimes of thought
being lost in dreams
of reality it seems.
Look what neglect has wrought.

This pristine page greets the eye
of the errant author.
demanding to be filled by more
and seeking once more
in literal dreams to fly.

Yes, it's been that long.
Pressing thoughts to paper
when being erudite didn't seem possible
and release felt so far away.
Thus now, it comes
the dam bursts
the words flow free
even though
the debris clouds
causes eddies
whirlpools of doubt
there is no structure
there is no form
all the beauty
all joy
all the pain
all life
flowing bitterly,
flowing blithely.

The taste of your mouth is intoxicating
as we drown in our first kiss.

The agony of desire, knife sharp
bleeding on the edge of mutual need.

I surrender to you, your taste
your need.

Silken skin under my nails
as pleasure rakes hers through me.

The heat , the ache, the despair
and desperation of lust.

This scarlet wanting burns
as I kiss you, again and again.

I cant let you go.
I have to go.

I kiss you goodbye, so sweet
and live in hope it wasn't the last.

Hearts misery
deep within
smouldering without
the dying embers
of helpless rage

Hearts ease
Blessed surcease
with love aplenty
and no heart empty
a smile on every face
no matter what race

An afternoon with you
beside me, with me
as we talk about things
and sit in companionable quiet
seeing you lost in your thoughts
dwelling on ideas I know naught of
writing these lines
not saying my mind
that I love you beyond
belief and thought
that I'm happy
with what we've wrought

Dreaming of dreams
unlimited by reality
as we soar
into the unknown
sailing like a lost ship
in an unknown sea
in our travels
veiled mystery

Will desire reign?
Does common sense take wing?
Will I fly?
Do I sing?

What can it mean
to dream of memory?
If memory is an absent queen
and new choices
Crown themselves King.

Despair shrouds
A wasted life
Nights spent, eyes awake
Mind that questions
All that befalls
Life seems such a waste
Of all that I had dreamed
If some ever came true
Whatever would I do?
Unreal it now seems
It will even then
Patterns traced in air
Dreams can be so unfair
When broken by time…

The welcome warmth
of an old companion
to bask in the pleasure
of good company
to laugh, to smile
to reminisce on times gone by
to drink, to eat
to exchange glances
to sift stories
to consume
this is how time flew by
this is why I smiled.

Flickering images on the screen
watching us writhe.
Just our skin between
aching, begging, longing
for your touch.
Gasping my need, reaching
across the glass partition
only to be met by frustration.
Look, but do not touch.
Enjoy the view, no hesitation.
This skin hungers for your caress
and waiting seems far too long.
Patience promises some distant success.
Playing with my inner self
imagining your powerful warmth around
my body, only to be bound myself.
Loving you and wanting you
holding my tongue, screaming for you.
Alone in my bed, alone in my head.
All this pleasure, all this pain.
Is what I feel all in vain?

Quietness reigns
this golden morning,
ensconced in my glass tower.

All around on the ground
below these eyes,
the world crawls.

Like beetles,
almost,
in my power.

This moment in time
sonorous in its silence
seemingly tranquil.

I await the oncoming storm,
serene, etiolate
denuded of fear.

I give thanks
my lord
my deepest feelings
are at thy feet
you gave me sorrow
that seem'd infinite
you give me joy
that is boundless
how do I repay
who do I repay
all that came to me
my heart feels too full
mine eyes brim with tears
a guilt lies within
fear of happiness
without a balance

I am lost
the way is dark
the light bleeds away
cut by pain that you inflict
with your lack of words
and your uncaring silence
I am lost
adrift in a Cimmerian sea
of tears, clinging
to a dissolving raft of hope
which breaks as I sigh.
I am lost
no one to find me
cast out
in tenebrous silence
gouged and set aside.
I am lost
I am lost.

Your hands glide down me
and feather my skin
as your lips dust my neck
and imprint pleasure.
Aching for your touch,
you play me
like a high strung violin
I sigh my desire
as you draw me across
your silken skin.
Sliding down you,
riding on you,
I scream your name
as I come
again and again.
I want you so much
I need your touch.
Take me again  lover
and lets sink into each other.

The grey road flashes by
as I travel this road
of life and its happenings.

The silken and rough mosaic
of events that define me
of life and its happenings.

The plain and rough time
of the unknowns, the unexperienced
of life and its happenings.

The pain and joy, the pleasure and sorrow,
the desire and horror await me
of life and its happenings.

Brushing past you
on the floor,
glancing quickly
to see you smile
your eyes light up
as do mine.
When I think of us
as we drank
from each other's eyes.
Our mouths enjoined
straining, as we dwell
in desire.
Distraught happiness.
Pained pleasures
as we drown,
slowly,
in one another.

Nothing waits on the other side
why do you still cross
lonely, stricken
wracked with love
you will follow
him where
even sorrow does not go...
Is this the life
Is this the choice
your heart makes
and love has no tomorrow?

Why do tears fall?
Why this sadness?
The storm clouds gathers
The darkness threatens
The tears will fall
The downpour threatens
With reasons obscure
Any icy hand closes
Over my heart
Leaching love
Carving life away
As I dream
My impossible dreams
Dreaming my sorrow away

I am tossed on seas
I am tossed on the seas
I am fraught with pain
The moon looks at me
with clouded eyes
mine own desert me
and strangers succour
what a world the goddess gave
what is taken
what is given
has no order
has no meaning

The drone of voices
surround me
controlled chaos
manipulated mayhem
confusion raises
his warty head
as we all
scramble ahead.
Chuckling, chatting
talking and mocking
this office, these people
this here my strife.
I can't wait
for this to be over
I cannot wait
for the silence.

Gazing out of the glass window
in a home
that's finally, mine.

Peace at last;
creeping in,
slowly but inexorably,
longed for, in time
which made my bones ache,
with weariness.

All mine, all mine.

A dream of solitude,
of life which is full
of new and old possibilities.

All mine, all mine.

Happiness,
in all its glory,
brief but savoured,
for all the pleasure
that can be had.

Content, yes I am.

Free, to feel,
the ache of new love,
to laugh, to run
across a heath,
heady is this taste
of freedom.

Ached for, longed for.

Those dark days
are over, are done.
Here I stand.
The wind in my face.
Looking forward,glancing behind.
This rain of joy,
slamming in as I turn

to run, run, run.

These bright days of summer.
This heated sun in my heart.
The warmth in my soul.
as I shine, I glow.

Happy, I am happy.

Long slow walks
after an evening of merriment
and much talk.

The pleasure of revealing
piece by piece of my soul
to you, who awaits the unveiling
of it with bated breath.

A new friend, a new entity.
Someone to drown in
and swim up again within.

Sweet slow smiles
shared laughter, music and joy
writhe together
in an agony of discovery.

Who are you?
Who, then, am I?

Sit here. Sit with me.
Sing with me, play with me.
Be my journey,
be the uncharted land.

Bring me again
the ecstasy of your being,
the pain, the pleasure
the discoveries within.

Night falls.
We rise.
We feed
and enjoy
the pulse
of life
as it
flows in
from them
to us.
Fulfilling
the quaggy
marshes of
our weary souls.

Mercy is a many splendored thing
What would it build?
What won't it bring?
Joy, sorrow, pain or fruition
incarnadine love
or tenebrous loathing.

The touch of his hands
on my heated skin
like silk on satin
as our bodies merge.
Deep kisses, an inhalation
of his essence.
an annihilation of sense
as he takes over my soul.

Listen to my heart
Can you hear me say?
The perfection of your being
The harmony of your presence
The beauty of the balance
Of our love
The well-being, the sense
Of peace
Suddenly life doesn’t feel
Like such a waste
But I love you
And that has restored
All of the dreams
That went so far away

Lying there
awake this night
when all things
make sense
in spite
of all the things
that went wrong
with us.
Know that I love you
know this that I need you.
I wish you would
looking to my heart
and find what you seek

Simple pleasures
in complex living.

Love is squandered
of faults unforgiving.

Seeking succour
in flesh and loving.

Run to his arms
needing and wanting.

Rejected, unloved
start at the beginning.

Had enough, don't know
if I'm coming or going.

Desire mounts to be
part of the unliving

Sat astride my iron horse, rumbling as it were
Twisting her horns, just a bit more
Hear her growl and roar
Eating miles, gliding ashore, black tarmac, paths unsure
Curling along snaking roads, blazing down the lines
Ambling through greens and moors, nature is sublime
Sun warming my body, wind settling my troubled soul
Gladdening this weary heart, my much beloved Virago

Shadows of darkness on parchment clean.
Scratched , inflicted as creation storms in.

Build, dream and see in the black marks
on my formerly pure, etiolated skin.

Play with the words, hide and then seek
me out again as I wait for you to ravage me.

Paint your voice on, I am your palette.
Make me beautiful with your cruel barbs of whim.

Waiting for the train to arrive
to return us to reality.
Waiting for the pleasure of your touch
to stop.
Waiting for your lips to touch mine
if ever.
The shock, the joy
as your mouth descends to mine.
The duel of mouths, tongues, skin
soft touches without.
The delirium and pain as we part
never to indulge again.

Oceans of sound
of melancholy extreme
swimming in solitude
drowning in peace.

The tyranny of quietude
the bonds of aloneness
grasping in the dark
gasping your pain.

Solace, there is none
neither is joy.
Stygian loneliness
forever apart.

Life is a phenomenon
Life is a phenomenon
You live to know
And as you grow
Your horizons expand
The view is as you make it
Each detail added
By living life as you will
The pleasure grows
So does the sorrow
Drop by drop in vast ocean
As you build
As you destroy
As you save
As you create

Soft touches on the inside of my skin,
sensitive to your every stroke,
playing with my senses,
sending sense flying to the winds.

The longing to touch you,
the hunger to be part of you,
the heated fantasies of skin on skin
and finding surcease within.

Inhaling your scent as you passed by,
drinking it in to satisfy
parched desire, unslaked need
as I yearn for thee.

Gasping awake from unrequited dreams,
floundering amid amative aches,
cogitating on your pellucid gaze,
wondering what you need.

We have tomorrow
let today be sacrifice
things might be troubled
and life may be inane
but we'll conquer our tomorrow
as we dream bright truths
and strive towards joy

The dark road rushes by
the lights dim in this hour
just before dawn,
before the day renews
the wind is whispering in my ears
chilling my bones
playing on my skin
"Winter comes, say goodbye to warmth."
"Say goodbye to love and welcome melancholy"
mine eyes fill with tears
the heart is heavy
Who am I to argue
with the unmovable?
I accept the blame
I accept my fate
I freeze
I am frozen
and I ride on
in the lightening gloom.

cold day
cold mind
to beauty
Blind
and joy
unable
to find