Something on my mind,
Don’t think I’m going to find,
What I’m looking for,
I can only see,
What I’ll never be,
Exactly what I’m looking for

I hear alarm bells in my head,
You fold your life up out of the way,
In a tiny sofa-bed,
Sit in the shower and then dream away the day
The choices spilling out,
Each one has so much doubt,
I can’t go back, or take back
If I have to choose right now,
Then I choose opting out,
If I break the tracks, there’s no going back,
Or taking back, just a train wreck

I’m sorry I’ve got other plans,
It’s easy if I pretend,
Not even I understand,
Why everything must be a dead end,
If I have to choose right now,
Then I choose opting out,
If I break the tracks, there’s no going back,
Or taking nothing back,
Just a train wreck

Jesus walks and,
He’s a homeless man,
Everyone’s talking,
All about him and,
They don’t know,
Or can’t understand,
That now he’s got to go,
There never was a plan

Where were you when,
When it all became a little clearer,
Did you fear the end?
What happened then?
I bet it made you feel freer
What happened then?

The devil talks and,
Whispers in my ear,
That Jesus walks and,
Now don’t you go,
There’s nothing to fear
Of what you don’t know,
Have another beer,
And enjoy the show

Where were you when,
When it all became a little clearer,
Did you always depend?
What happened then?
I bet it made you feel freer
But that’s pretend
That’s pretend

Clouds in eyes,
My disguise,
******,
Truth built on lies,
I despise,
******

Teardrops make a river,
That runs into a lake,
My dreams now flow in streams,
Showing the world all my mistakes,
Water, water everywhere,
And not a drop to drink,
Can’t close my eyes or try to blink,
So I just lie awake

Lost in a deep sea of thoughts,
Hold on or I might sink,
Water, water everywhere,
And not a drop to drink

Looking over the edge,
And see nothing looking back,
Become what I’ve been running from,
And descend into the black,
Water, water everywhere,
And not a drop to drink,
Now my tears turn to the black of ink,
Each drop deepening the cracks

Putting rocks in my pockets,
So that I always sink,
Am I dead or alive instead?
Too many waves and I can’t think,
Water, water everywhere,
Water, water everywhere,
And not a drop to drink

Thursday mornings are,
Harder to take at night,
There’s a book I’m trying to write,
For you,
I don’t know why,
I do these things I do,
This is a hill you can dig around,
Take it from me, white rabbit

My clock is ticking,
Two days behind yours,
No time to say hello, goodbye,
If I’m in trouble,
Then you are too,
What’s the point in even trying?
Take it from me it’s not worth it, white rabbit

I’m running so late

I wish we’d never met,
But still I feel you’re,
A part of me that I really like,
If and when I see you,
I’m going to lower my hat,
Although all I do is make you mad,
Take it from me, white rabbit
I’m sorry I’m so late, white rabbit

He has the right to know,
But he can’t,
All these years don’t show,
The miscreant still deviant,
And I can’t let go

Though I don’t care at all,
But I should,
Draw a line with a broken ruler,
Only if I could,
But I want to fall

He has everything I need,
But he don’t,
Withered tree from mighty seed,
Warrant from the won’ts,
And I shall not be freed

It couldn't possibly be real,
But it is,
A wooden sword or one of steel,
A fist or a kiss,
I confuse how they feel

He just doesn't know the end or when,
But I lie,
He just doesn't know that it’s back again,
I try,
To become my King of Men

And I don’t feel sorry,
But I do,
His story forever a missed story,
To you,
But you don’t know his mystery

Now my tongue did what my hand could not,
Now my hand did what my head forgot,
Now my head sifts through the damp and rot,
Now I'm holding onto to something but I don’t know what

The nurses run a palindrome,
Encased in my own phrase unknown,
Prefixed albeit in the womb,
Transfixed from crucifix to tomb,
Bruising ears with wounding tongue,
Rousing tears with printed plunge,
Into maddening discourse of course,
Twisting turns to twisted source,
Watery words erode the mind,
Spilling from recesses long mine,
Explosions of thoughts buried in bone,
Devotion to that and to that alone,
Things thought so simple and done so nearly,
What seems so clear is not so, clearly,
Here and yet not here at all,
Miracle of the medicinal lyrical,
Vestige a silhouette of sense,
Simplicity complicated dense,
Lost in a forgotten forest of complicates,
****** in delusional dictation so delicate,
Created a copy Cheshire Cat all the while,
Led into Wonderland mile by smile,
Confuse and felicitate all my many meanings,
Intrude and confiscate that being,
Into cognitive conjunction uncoordinated sink,
For you to finally think to think

I’m indebted,
But didn’t pay anyone a cent,
Gave everything to the imagined and regretted,
Demons in my head

They’re silhouetted,
Shadows echo words I never meant,
You whispered to me, quiet everything that they’ve said,
There’s nothing to fear, there’s no monsters in this bed.

You are the silence in the hurricane inside my mind,
You are the sense of seeing to these broken eyes born blind

Walking beheaded,
With hands in the pockets of the dead,
Lost my mind, I fumbled for the dreaded,
Hold my hand instead

I was ended,
But did not know she was my start,
I meant what I said,
I am giving my whole heart,
That I was breaking when alone,
You can fix it and turn it back from stone,
I’ve been missing; now anywhere you are is where I call home.

You are the silence in the hurricane inside my mind,
You are the sense of seeing to these broken eyes born blind,
You are the electricity that woke my heart from the darkness deep beneath,
You are the words I can’t find, the meaning that I need,
You are the half of me I could not hear in my cyclone,
You are the house I long thought destroyed; now anywhere you are is where I call home.