i find me in you,
in the sense that i can't breathe,
i wish i were lost.

I never think of you.
Your face never crosses my mind.
Your dark eyes
Are quite forgotten,
And I cannot remember that they are
The shade of a puddle
Waiting for rainboots.

I never think of you,
And I do not care.
It does not bother me
That I cannot hear your laughter
Behind me,
Or the whispers for my ear.
I do not even recall your absence
Until I look around me for an answer
And realize that you are not there.

I never think of you,
And there is no love lost.
You were never even a dandelion seed for me,
Not ever even a wisp of a wish
To pin everything on,
And now that you are gone,
My dreams have not floated away
With you.
On the wind,
Off to some new ground.

I never think of you,
And your name does not escape my lips
Softly when I am not dreaming of you,
When no one is listening,
Not even I.

I never think of you,
My love,
And there will be no poetry
Written for you,
Nor the smallest word spoken for
The love of you
Or the loss of you,
For no love was lost.

Abuse and violence
Awaited her at home.
Her nights were spent sobbing,
Dreading one more night alone.
Beaten and traumatized,
She came to me, so teary-eyed,
Still crying, after one more night
Brought on yet another fight.

Strongly, she stood as
Her mother cruelly drove the
Words through her head,
“I’d rather you were dead”,
Nothing could prepare us for
What lied ahead.

As I soon saw her,
Walking down my street,
I smiled in her direction.
My feet, tapping to the quickened heartbeat.
“I must leave” Were her sudden words,
To me it sounded so absurd,
“I have to leave this place of sorrow,
My way out will come tomorrow.”
“How far away?”
I had to ask,
“Too far away
For us to have a chance.”
She replied,
Wiping bitter tears from her eyes.

So there we stood,
For what seemed like hours,
Crying together,
Bitterly watering the flowers at our feet…
At the end of my dimly-lit street.

Please.
Don't Speak.
Not Yet.

Let me live in this silence.
In this limbo.

There is still hope here
that you may not break my heart.

Just give me this moment.
Please.

This could still end happily.
With hugs and kisses and promises.

It won't
But right now I can pretend.

Please.
Let me dream here longer.

But you open your perfect lips.
And I am broken.

Please.
Just leave.
Now.

We are well-defined
in the obvious
     the elemental;
food, ***, laughter, song.

I accept your guitar
and understand your hands.
You understand my chaos
and accept my need
to outwardly order things.
Sleight-of-hand; my manifest patina
to deflect scrutiny
of a disorderly mind
and a mutinous heart.

(I don't know any more than you
why I love you always, sometimes)

You have called me anchor,
kissed my rope-burned palms
in return
I have witnessed your knight,
crossed your chivalrous cloak
thrown down on ***** water.

Yet, for all the elements,
for all the ropes and ladders
there still exists this aether;
the candle's blue flicker
where you drift, and I
drown.