When I first saw you, I thought to myself:
"I really like her septum piercing."
And I told you.
You showed me how you could move it without touching it,
and I thought that was pretty cool.
Then I noticed your face.
Your beautiful, breath taking brown eyes that had the slightest hint of green.
Then I noticed your clothes, and how you carried yourself.
You always looked like you could punch someone if you needed to, but still elegant.  
Then I noticed your sense of humor, and your love for drugs.
Then I noticed the scars on your arm.
and I understood.
You were my friend.
You told me you were a model once, and honey, it was obvious.
You are the most beautiful girl I have ever met.
But you never believed me when I told you that.
You never believed anyone.
And maybe if you did, you'd still be here.
If we ever met again, I would make sure you knew.
I would make sure you knew how loved you were, and how amazing you are.
Because maybe if I told you more often,
maybe if you knew, or if we got you help,
just maybe..,
you wouldn't have left.
And just maybe, I wouldn't cry when a train passed my house.

Swimming is fun.
But if you're like me,
and you can't swim that well,
sometimes you go under from time and time again.
But you always come back up, eventually.
Life is kind of like that.
One day you're just walking through the water,
and it's a bit too high,
and then your foot slips.
You go under.
You panic.
and you come back up,
eventually ,
coughing and gasping for air.
Sometimes,  if you were under long enough,
it takes you a minute to get yourself back together.
This happens a lot in life, well, to me.
You're just out living,
and suddenly..
you're in a knee-deep pool of emotions.
Maybe it's because of stress, or drama, or maybe it's nothing.
But whatever it is, it keeps building up and up,
and you can't really do anything,
so you just kind of accept it.
Eventually, you end up to where you're in up to your shoulders,
and it's getting harder to stay up.
You try to get out, but you cant, and that only makes it so much worse.
You're stuck.
You're going under.
And sometimes you come back up after a bit, and eventually you're fine.
Sometimes, though..
you're not too sure if you're going to make it back up again.