Dear future love,
     Will you one day write poems for me? Would you write beautiful words with me as your inspiration? Could you capture me in between college-ruled lines? Paint a picture of me without picking up a paint brush? Write to me, about me , for me - like I see him do for her. Please tell me have we met, or will we ever? Am I just a face you see now, an image , a thought , a word. Can you let me know? Send a sign to your love. Or have the signs been sent and I , looking too hard for them. Am I overlooking the obvious, the perfect, the person, the you? Please tell me that you are out there wondering who the girl is that is writing about you!
Love
Always

I lay awake when I should be asleep...
No when I should be dreaming
But....I am awake my eyes are burning from staring at the screen.
My heartbeats flutter and add extra rhythm.
My life slowly gaining momentum as I stay stationary, lying in my bed listening to the rain.

This aging confuses me so.
How can one day I wake up and have my mommy take care of everything
To me making sure I can handle myself?
Going from no fear
To a fear of everything ?
To development, growth, improvement, struggle, hate, love and all in-between.
It's all chaos to me.
All of it.
But
I'm growing up.
And I can't stop it.

Beneath the large oak
I'll wait every day after school with my books and a snack
Waiting for him to ride by on his bike
Bringing with him the air of summer and grass stained clothes
We ride together, speeding through puddles
Speeding though problems like they are nothing but oil
We ride through time, without reason or rhyme
Without purpose or direction we leave that oak tree
Together. Free.
Free. Together.

Unfortunately or maybe fortunately everyone reaches that point
With someone else
The point of no return
Where you know far too much
But recieve far to little
Where that line is burned in you skin
The designated boundaries  you cannot cross
Because you would never risk it all
That point of no reverse
Stuck in neutral
Stuck in the mud
Stuck in a friendship
Stuck in that zone

to sleep is to dream*
Or so I am told

But you said
I don't get much sleep

And it's true you don't sleep
You don't want to dream like that
Those thoughts are too real
You subconscious yells at you any tells you things you think are true
You lie to yourself in this dream (nightmare)

The reason why you have nightmares is because
your reality is a dream

What you have before you
Are friends and love and warmth
You don't need to dream

And to deal with this imbalance
The natural order of the world
Invades your dreams with lies

So
You don't sleep and dream

*you live to dream

Tis the Season
*To believe