I picture my veins carrying ****** slush
The ice from my heart breaks away
and gets caught in the current
it is always forming a new layer;
it is always replacing what is lost
Maybe this is why my body always feels so cold
maybe this is why I do not feel
because I am always numb from the frozen shreds
flowing through my veins.

I took notice of how time had been dulling the blue in my eyes,
stealing the glow of my skin,
forcing my lips into a permanent straight line.
Time had punched me and left purple valleys under my eyes
and made my hair fall limp.
Time had knocked me down and held me to the ground with one stiletto to the chest.
I was losing myself to a faceless enemy,
and I had no control.
This old friend had done the impossible
and dug the biggest knife into my back.

Clouds of sadness and pain shadow your eyes
A little uneasy frown occupies your lips
Your step falters again and again
I see how hard it is to keep up this charade
The final straw is broken
Your gone
Promising to come back new
I miss you greatly
My selfishness rears it's ugly head as I wish to have you back
I must wait
I will wait for you

My dearest Ariah, I love you. I miss you like no other. I can't wait to have my best friend back.

Maybe it was for the simple fact that I couldn't have you
Maybe it was because you felt different

You weren't everyone else
To me

But I was everyone else
To you

There was no chance
To begin with

There was no point
There was no point

I am me

And that stops everything

I have nothing to give
I have nothing to make me different

You have everything to give
You are different

There was no point
There was no point

I was nothing then
I am nothing now
I will forever be

NOTHING

I am not a pretty face
For to be a pretty face you must have a pretty face

I am not a model
For to be a model you must be skinny

I am not special
For to be special something has to make you special

I'm not a people person
For to be a people person you must have friends

I was nothing then
I am nothing now
I will forever be

**NOTHING

If I deny any longer
I will go mad

We will be nothing
The word 'we' has no meaning between us

There will never be an us
this love is a one way ray

My heart may shatter
My mind may refuse to accept

My lung might deny me what I need
My eyes may betray me in search

My brain may overcapacitate
I may be rendered unconscious

For loving one with my all
Takes my all

This ray shines one way
For I am alone

And shall remain alone
Until there is an us

A break up
The first of many

Abuse from your mom
Just one incident

A word
One meant to hurt you mentally
But hurts you both mentally and physically

Another break up
The worse yet

A comment that should have stayed in their head
Now to haunt you

Your life
It's hell
I know baby, I know

You go through so much
And your arms and thighs show it

But you like it
The thought of them
What they represent

Battle Scars

The sound of your heartbeat
It's the rhythm that tells me to to breath

The feeling of your hand over mine
It's the small spark that reminds me to move

The sound of your laugh
It's the song that my life dances on to

You don't understand how much you hurt me
every breath
every glance
every step
like a blow to the heart

breathing you in when you wall by
intoxicating

Our wandering eyes meet
I look away
reluctantly

i want you to touch me
momentarily
On accident
So you can feel the same jolt as I do
the spark
the flames

one look
touch
glance
and you would no how I feel
no words uttered
only movement

His eyes
Big pools of melted chocolate
capture my attention and put me in a daze

His bangs
hovering over his forehead
casting a slight shadow

His cheeks
always tanned
Always flushed

Hs small acne spots
making him look older
yet younger in the same moment

Eyes describing so many things
showing maturity confusion
anger intelligence
sympathy
a longing only understood by few

his smile
it kills me

his lips
they ssend me over the edge
making me impatient

his voice
it lulls me
Calms me in my worst of outrages moods
a song that reminds me to breathe
in
and out

his patience
tells me that he would wait
There would be no pressure

his quietness
tells me he'll listen

his being
it gives me
a reason