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brian mclaughlin Oct 2015
my opinion was questioned
my view then became clouded
are my beliefs now that of another
no longer do I have an understanding
nothing of this life path that has been set before me
can be seen
I feel as if I am now blind
my direction lost
there is no moving on from where I find myself
no longer do I know which way is forward

why is it some wish to mold everyone they meet
into a clone of themselves
brian mclaughlin Jan 2016
The cloud entered
along with it rain
a time full of trouble
filled with sorrow and pain.

Heartache and tears
filling my days
stealing my joy
in so many ways.

The days became long
as if with no ends
it was an awful aloneness
as if without friends.

But true friends did exist
helping me make each tomorrow
till that cloud did move on
and ease this deep sorrow.

Well the new day brought hope
as the son warmed my soul
my heart finally was healed
and once again I felt whole.
brian mclaughlin Jan 2016
I built my walls
dug my moat
they will not be breached
for if I were to open the doors
to trust any from outside them
the assult might prove more than I could handle
but I am safe here in my stone castle
at times I feel imprisoned
how could I again give my heart to another
brian mclaughlin Jan 2016
So many crayons
Colors chosen fill the lines
My past in the books
brian mclaughlin Mar 2016
Times may be many
where things might not go my way
but that will never be reason
to hold my children at bay
it's a love like no other
they're my babies you see
I just hope that they realize
I've still got a strong healthy knee
come sit on my lap
let me hold you once more
and whether you're coming or going
there will be a hug at the door
brian mclaughlin Sep 2015
There is this stream
it carries the music of life through the forest
calming the soul and spirit
of any and all who spend time
listening to its song

As I sit by waters edge
my toes being kissed by its gentle current
I find an unexpected blessing
one that has always been there for me.
All that was needed
was for me to come and accept it

To get here I  left a world
ravaged by a rushed
and impatient society.
Its greed and lack of kindness
has taken its sad toll of far too many

That world would have owned me as well
had I not come to this place
far away from the mean streets
away from the get ahead at any cost attitude it has
free of the stress it imparts

It is a place of true comfort
more tranquil than one could ever imagine

The stream flows through me
its music feeds my spirit
its song fills my heart

The thoughts of that other place
now washed from my mind
it seems as though I have grown new ears
I have learned to listen in a whole new way
my eyes opened now to beauty
wherever they land
my heart, opened wider than ever
being filled with great joy

I have never known such peace

I think I'll stay awhile
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
Is it couldn't or wouldn't
you know they're two different things

Do you not have the time
or simply won't take it
you've called me your friend
why do I feel that you fake it
each time that I need you
you just never do make it

Couldn't, no wouldn't
that's an action that stings

You said that you'd be there
but never did go that mile
should I accept this abuse
the way it's been done with a smile
you know I hate being lied to
but it really seems that's your style
brian mclaughlin Jan 2016
I colored within the lines
my picture seemed so dull
my work held no adventure

My spirit is held in Limbo

My freedom of expression
my personal taste
frowned upon

Must I lie to myself

The rulemakers say
if I am to have their approval
I must continue to follow their rules

Do I not have a right to approve of myself

If I am to live within a prison
it will not be of their making
it will be the one I choose for myself

It's time to set my crayons free
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
desire
wish
thirst
hunger
yearning
greed
lust
covetousness
lasciviousness
lechery
why couldn't it just be
LOVE
brian mclaughlin Aug 2016
The dense smoke hides the sun.
Now enveloped in this darkness
I am alone, yet
there is no peace.
Wars ravish the lands,
innocents continue to die.
Is the flexing of muscle
and the want for riches
really worth the lives of children?
brian mclaughlin Oct 2015
The nights of my life
that morphed into days
tired body and mind
in so many ways

to rise from the bed
not rested at all
seemed to promise me daily
an additional fall

my spirit now broken
my energy gone
these sleepless nights
they've gone on too long

I don't want to work
it's become a struggle to live
the hungry faces keep coming
and I have no more to give

across this world children starving
and I don't understand why
with the government's riches
hungry kids have to die
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
We have
expectations
some are unreasonable
that go beyond our normal means
setting goals that are unachievable
causing a great disappointment
killing self confidence
ruining what
we have

Wanting
disappointed
for lack of obtaining
those things we were not meant to have
things that would only bring disappointment
people need a satisfied heart
why do we choose to live
disappointed
wanting

Of life
becoming hard
why look outside ourselves
the pain comes from wrongful desire
not being satisfied with what we have
wanting things we have no need of
always looking for more
is that the spice
of life

The spice
real happiness
does not come from our toys
yes they bring joy for the moment
but we tire of toys as they become old
yet we still look there for our joy
it is within our hearts
that we will find
the spice

Dive in
the waters fine
like the submariner
we must dive deep into ourselves
if we wish to find true and lasting joy
that which is outside of ourselves
can leave without warning
protect you joy
dive in
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
The dawn breaks
the rays of the sun
edge past your blinds
casting light upon your eyes
now is the time to rise
engage your mind
greet the new session
that brings a new lesson
for there is much to be learned
from this gift you've received
called today
brian mclaughlin Nov 2015
You must wake to their lies
unto the truth
and it must be done
during the days of youth

for those who wait
until days of old
will find that their heart
has been grown as a mold

kept in the dark
and living in shadows
always afraid
to look out their windows

denying the violence
accepting the wars
and avoiding the truth
they've become cold hearted ******
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
To sing
laugh
and dance
is life
when we stop
our spirit dies
brian mclaughlin Aug 2015
The moment missed
asleep at the wheel
the day now passed
I'm not sure how I feel

It's tomorrow already
yesterday's lost
keeping my eyes closed
came with a cost

Each day comes but once
when gone can't come back
traveling on the winds of time
leaving dust behind in its track

A dusty life
makes it hard to breathe
but to watch eyes wide open
lets you ride the breeze

Life is for living
celebrating each day
not for closing the eyes
and losing your way
brian mclaughlin Oct 2015
love
meant for the heart
denied
for lack of trust
brian mclaughlin Sep 2015
Void of spirit
her remnants
wandered without purpose
the scars on her cheeks
were carved by tears
from empty eyes
that told of the absence of her soul
brian mclaughlin Aug 2015
Try to emulate others
no, not on your life
the conflict that builds
brings nothing but strife

Why would I wish to be someone else
is there something wrong with being myself
why go to the trouble of being another
would that not be lying to the world around me

Integrity step aside
no place here for you
the truth is now hidden
under my shoe

The mirror then tells a new story
one of a person I barely recognize
I have to question just who he is
and whether I can trust him for the truth

Is it not truth that builds trust
while lies break it down
those who once smiled as friends
step back now with frowns

The ruination of self
that's what comes with the copy
again I say, be a snowflake
don't be afraid to be different
brian mclaughlin Feb 2015
We've had enough
we want our boys home
there's no need for more dying
on battle fields all alone

These wars stealing lives
and not just of the soldiers
broken hearts of their families
dealing with new burdened shoulders

Dead, disabled
body and spirit
the families cry out ENOUGH
but our leaders don't hear it

Playing their politics
doing so for their profit
the war machine must continue
and reelection first on the docket

They've forgotten the people
the little guy no longer matters
since Citizens United
allowed these politicians new handlers

The ballot belongs to the rich
it's money stuffing the box
and one of these days
we'll find our country on blocks
brian mclaughlin Feb 2015
enslaved by the dollar
that's what we are
and the pittance received
it don't go very far

folks keep working harder
and production goes up
while their wages stay flat
the profits go up

often forced to apply
for help from the state
workers become labeled takers
was this stigma their fate

then complaints are put forth
about the redistribution of wealth
but that's how capitalism is supposed to work
thanks trickle down stealth

today's dollar trickles up
to the pockets of the rich
as daily more do without
ain't redistribution a *****!
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
While telling your lie
you become a slave till you die
to a story
that's hard to remember

But with the truth you'll be free
as that story won't flee
and you'll know it
even in life's December
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
I find myself alone
even the cats have slept in
there is a strange quiet that comforts the soul

Within my mind
there plays the soft music
the sounds of tranquility
dew dripping into the silent pool
doves gently cooing in the branches

I close my eyes
the moments pass
the music of remembrance continues

I have no need to seek peace
for it has found me

Though my shell
is of no further use in this world
my spirit soars

Chapter two
brings new life
brian mclaughlin Nov 2015
justifying the war
because we're the good guy
and putting down evil
is our reason why
is ignoring the fact
that our enemy
believes they're the good guy
fighting the evil they see
brian mclaughlin Apr 2015
How do we find peace,
is it not through making friends?

Tell me how friends are made
through exclusion.

To leave others out of the circle
sows fine seeds of distrust
distrust creates dissension
dissension then discord
discord leads to arguments
and arguments to anger
anger brings about violence
and from violence often death.

Peace becomes buried under
a blanket of bitterness and hate.

There must be a way
that there can come a day
to show respect to each man
throughout every land
where all men become brothers
instead of thought of as others.

Exclusion drives men to war!
brian mclaughlin Apr 2015
An eye for an eye
leaves everyone blind
and yet we **** on
never looking behind
increasing the pain
of those who yet live
and those who seek closure
when there's none there to give
there are days that I wonder
how long we have left
our time now has been stolen
and we're all victims of theft
brian mclaughlin Apr 2016
hearts cold
filled with a loneliness
delivered by abandonment

thoughts muddled
with an uncertainty
of a blinded minds eye

spirits descend
to places far more dangerous
than the hell that took them there

once all becomes black
there is little chance to return
from the depth of depression
brian mclaughlin May 2016
This fear of the unknown,
unwarranted, yet it resides deep within me.
Why am I afraid to live in this moment?
I shrink at the thought of the next,
what tomorrow might bring me.
My future seen through this negative mindset
leaves my mind weak and spirit broken.
My emotions out of control.
Days wasted, worrying of things that haven't
and may never happen.
My life, empty of peace.
Every moment given away
waiting on the worst to present itself.
My negative thoughts
have brought a sickness to my heart
and death to my spirit.
brian mclaughlin Sep 2015
Outside my window

Life

So changed from what it once was
people so different from what they were
today it seems as if
we have no time for others
we act as if we are threatened
by those who pass by
even by our neighbors
ever on our guard
the only respect we show
seems to be
because of our fear

Outside my window
life in its ridiculousness
I watch as they walk by
afraid to make eye contact
unable to greet each other

No, it's not just those two across the street
they've been feuding for years
it appears to be almost everyone

There was a time when women
would nod and give a slight curtsy
and men
would tip their hats in greeting
it was a time
that people showed respect for each other
in the form of politeness

Today's respect is shown by their
avoidance of acknowledgment
due to fear of possible confrontation

There are so many angry people in the world today
the shame is that they don't have to be angry if they don't want to be
they hold on  to their anger as if it is their life's blood
like those two across the street
only their feud seems to be with life itself

Will they ever see
will they ever understand
they hurt themselves in their denial of joy
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
Total quiet
of heart
of soul
brings peace
tranquility
and harmony
to the life
we've been born to.

Our spirit
is fed
and nourished
it grows
giving us
the comforting
knowledge of
who we are.

We become one
with our surroundings
part of nature
and of all things
as we dive
deeper
into ourselves
to our very core.

Here
in this
time
and place
of quiet
we learn
to love.
brian mclaughlin Mar 2016
Tid-bits of fish food
sprinkled on the surface
bottom feeders ascend
brian mclaughlin Feb 2015
Feet, they're wonderful things
to the body a purpose they bring
not very pretty at all
but when you are walking
or even standing and talking
thank them as they don't let you fall

that's right you can't win
they're as ugly as sin
go ahead paint the nails if you must
just be grateful they're there
you're not on your derriere
for your balance in them you can trust
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
Thoughts of days gone by
came rushing in that morning
filling my mind with wonderful memories
as I wandered the bluffs alone

The grasses were heavy laden with dew
I found myself sitting upon the grass to watch
the sun was about to open this new day

I now understood what was meant
“this is the first day of the rest of your life”

I was not about to miss this sunrise
as I had missed so many
for so long a time

It was a prison of my own making
that had kept me away

As I sat and watched
a faint orange began to emerge
far across the sea
from beyond my imaginings

That prison I mentioned
had no walls
yet it seemed as there were many

It didn't matter the direction I turned
they always appeared only at arms length

The days seemed to meld into one another
as if they had no beginnings
nor endings

There was no laughter
nor were their tears

The days
no
years
just were

My eyes
turned back to the colorful sky
they filled with tears

My heart felt
joy

I began to laugh

I felt
alive
for the first time
in so many years

Why had I stayed within that shell of sorrow
how was it that a loss
could hold me for what seemed
forever

That wonderful orange

This orange sky that I see before me

Is the same orange

As the sarong she wore that morning
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
Fire with fire
an eye for an eye
the whole world burns
more men become blind

The earth became charred
man had lost his way
that choice of blindness
brought his last day
brian mclaughlin Jan 2015
Fire with fire
an eye for an eye
the whole world burns
more men become blind

The earth became charred
man had lost his way
that choice of blindness
brought his last day

Fire with fire
an eye for an eye
while children are dying
governments don't seem to mind

It's from collateral damage
it's the price that you pay
it's part of war in today's world
at least that's what they say

Fire with fire
an eye for an eye
putting an end to this madness
is simply just being kind

Respecting our neighbors
this is the greatest gateway
if man could only learn
to put love on display
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
So few days
but in many ways
the journey too long
the things that went wrong
there seemed no return
from the terrible burn
the flames of failure deliver

The dream too soon over
I'd counted on clover
but luck wasn't with me
it just wasn't to be
now everything lost
I had not realized the cost
then I began to shiver

Then my life turned around
I emerged from the ground
it didn't take long
to find that new song
which extinguished the fire
lifting me out of the pyre
the world then began to shimmer
brian mclaughlin Dec 2014
Forgiveness
is for the soul
releasing the evil
that's taken a hold
bitterness, anger and hate
the spirit killers
that can seal your fate
tearing you down and leaving a life
of misery that's filled
with a great strife

Forgiveness
it's for your own heart
protecting your spirit
doing its part
righting your path
to one where joy can be found
giving away all that evil
to which you've been bound

Forgiveness
it's really for you
you're not saying it's fine
it's just what you must do
for with it comes freedom
for your spirit and heart
giving them life once again
giving you a new start
brian mclaughlin May 2015
I've written of forgiveness
so many times
sometimes more prose
other times more in rhymes
but one things for certain
it's what you must do
and it's not really for them
it's mostly for you

Letting loose of your anger
will comfort your soul
free up your heart
and in the end makes you whole
but if you hold tight
on to your bitterness
you'll be cheated of joy
and won't find happiness
brian mclaughlin Dec 2015
Forward
yet without direction
empty of purpose
empty of life
the spirit has left
my heart aches for love
does anyone care
it doesn't show
but how can I know for sure
if I don't look back
there is this feeling
that their eyes follow
do they watch as I pass
are they looking at me
or beyond to a destination of their own
are we all on the same path
has everything I have known
we've known
become a pit filled with nothingness
a complete void
that swallows any who dare desire
I long for a companion
one to pull me back from this vortex
maybe then this trek might seem tolerable
maybe then this darkness will abate
maybe then I can once again live
brian mclaughlin May 2015
There's poetry here in my heart
the trouble is gracing the paper
no words do flow unto my pen
my mind contains nothing but vapor

Thoughts so jumbled
I cannot think
from this emptiness
my heart doth shrink

To be reborn
to come alive
those lovely words
I must revive

To write again
to share this heart
it's what I must do
how do I start

Words on paper
not making sense
they're not fulfilling
they make me tense

There's a dam within
holding back the flood
yet I plod on
as if through mud

I know they'll come
this drought will end
the words will flow
once again be penned

Rejoicing now
as the words return
from heart to paper
they begin to churn

They're like a taste of honey
blessing the soul
for now as they flow
I again feel whole
brian mclaughlin Aug 2016
I stepped from the pumpkin,
found the sky to be littered.
There were bright shiny stars,
they surrounded the sun.
It was a moon shadow following me
as I walked above the clouds.

I watched the airplanes,
funny how they flew backwards.
I wondered which way the people were seated.  
Do they realize that they are going
where they came from.

To ask would be so impolite
and an admission
of my weak understanding
of this new day.

Life is play!

Then I thought of
Little Big Man.
Oh how he could ride.

The people in the plane
smiled at me,
all at once.
It was as if on cue.

I checked my fly.

Wanting to return inside the pumpkin
I made an about face
and in its place
I saw a whale leap down
from the surface of the sea above me.
He beckoned for me to enter
and then promised,
I would find what I was searching for within.

There was a tree
with a small stream running beside it.
I sat with my back against it,
fell asleep
and dreamed of a world at peace.
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
The failure to thrive
the longer man is alive
is the result
of when he quits trying

He feels he's played his last card
to move on much to hard
there's no hope
is what he's implying

Then his spirit it dies
as his mind tells him lies
and deep within
his heart is left crying

But now it's too late
once backed off from the plate
striking out
with little left but the dying
brian mclaughlin Aug 2016
It is not your glow dear lamp of the night,
but your tidal draw upon my mind that keeps me from my rest.
You have made of me a lunatic.
Driven me into the night to howl with the dogs.
The hair upon my neck bristles, sweat drips from my brow.
My breath quickens along with the beat of my heart.
How can you in such beauty deliver so much trouble?
brian mclaughlin Sep 2015
I write this to you Christianity

What matters more
that we pray for
or feed the hungry
the flow of manna from heaven
today is nowhere to be seen
other than where it is with the help
from the hand of man

Was it not to be shared with all of gods chosen
by your word, your savior came to save all
his father fed them in the wilderness
he fed them on the mount
yet many die today of starvation
why must even one go hungry

This world has a glut of food
all it needs is to be shared
distributed to those in need
yet so much is thrown away

I guess it's less expensive letting it go to waste
when the bottom line is your desired taste

I have to wonder
those who feel that need to pray
and then do nothing to help
do they not see
that they are the answer
for what they pray for
their hearts would not have been touched
if they weren't

Or is it just more of the same lip service

Even if we were just to sit down
and share half of our sandwich
we would be helping them
renewing their faith
restoring their spirit
helping to ease their pangs of hunger

prayers without works
my friend, they're dead
as your heart is unchanged
where is your head
do you not understand
you've been called to good works
to help and feed others
should be looked on as perks
never a burden
rewards then received
as smiles grace a face
with their hunger relieved
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
When ones heart is giving
their life is worth living
the smiles they receive
are quite enough

As their faces say thank you
and eyes well with dew
their need filled
today won't be as tough

This day they'll survive
once again feel alive
your heart being thrilled
your life being filled
your giving
to the living
has done the right stuff
brian mclaughlin Jul 2015
I tried to read
my eyes so tired
the words
not much more than a blur on a sea of white

(did you know that having only one eye
you often cannot see past the floaters)

Occasionally they would clear but the story was all but lost

Do I back up and try again
or just quit
put the book down
give up
move on to mindless entertainment

The imagination is so far more desirable

The pictures the mind can paint
the completeness of the intent of the writer
the book so superior to the movie

(how often the transition of the story is missed
movies seldom do books proper justice)

How I yearn to be able to once again
sit and read for hours on end
allowing the art of the author to take me on a trip
trips that I have missed since that loss

The words have been shared
“never give up”
shouldn't they be remembered in all matters of our lives

I think maybe that it's time to go back and try again

I think, maybe I wrote this for me
brian mclaughlin May 2016
Hello darkness
thank you sleep
how wonderful the two of you are.
The pain brought me by the harsh light of day,
finally being eased.
I've long accepted the blindness
but the pressure,
the burning,
there is no getting used to them.
It is your touch though
that helps free me from the anguish.
Today has been so ******* my eyes.
Maybe tomorrow will be easier.
brian mclaughlin May 2016
I have eaten and my belly is filled
yet the sweet and savory flavors remain
my taste buds beg for more
so I surrender and continue to eat
my satisfaction had brought so much joy
but now the pain begins to grow in my gut
how foolish my over indulgence has become
brian mclaughlin Dec 2014
Painful lack of words
writing becomes much too hard
where have our poems gone.

Words written in haste
now make very little sense
without any flow.

They are no longer
as a body without breath
alive for others.

Emptiness resides
in a heart without feeling
our words have no life.

Those words without life
failing to bless a hearer
become of no use.

Why do we ignore
inspiration from nature
our muse is asleep.

Once it awakens
words return to the living
joy comes to our hearts.
brian mclaughlin Mar 2015
Blind in the one
I see ok out the other
but the ears
they be ringin' all day
the knees ache when I rise
it's a pain I despise
an the back
needs support in some way
now the nose sometimes works
but can't identify much
the taste buds confused
whether food's sweet or sour
it seems I'm declining
with each passing hour
but it don't matter much
as you should be believin'
all that really matters is
that I'm still here breathin'
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