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Brian lockwood Oct 2015
On the desk lies the pad
In the hand rests the pen
Dead to writes
Is the poets end
Brian lockwood Oct 2015
My dark passenger
Bids me drive on
The night is just beginning
Brian lockwood Oct 2015
Time flies
Fading like the bug bites of summertime
To the chapped lips
Of the most bitter winter
Brian lockwood Oct 2015
That week
nearly a year ago
When we didnt speak
Each day
Disappointment in your son
Took you past the point of tears to
Pure avoidance
Of eye contact, speech,
And everything in between
Unable to look at me
Without steady streams
Cascading down your face
I thought i had hurt you beyond forgiveness
And that week I learned what it would be like to live without you
If only you knew the hurt
I went though
Having caused pain so deep
You couldnt even speek to me
Feeling your
Forgiveness, your love
Was like being pardoned of a life
Sentence
Like being led to the light
Out of darkness
Like I was a dehydrated desert wanderer
You were my water
You quenched my thirst
You loved me first
And I love you in return
Brian lockwood Oct 2015
Life is a beautiful symphony
Filled with broken dreams and serendipity
All written out on sheet music that we can not see
Yet we enjoy the show none the less
It is a masterpiece
Brian lockwood Oct 2015
I have made a mistake
I have left oceans of broken hearts and tears in my wake
Sharks take what they may
And the tide confides in me that I have made a grave mistake
Brian lockwood Oct 2015
They say that life begins at deaths front door
Well I was a poor man, a beggar
pounding on that door with all the strength I had left in store
Knock! Knock! Knock!
but when my calls went unanswered
and my pleas unappeased
I was very un happy, I was very displeased
I said I have nothing left to offer, Id rather be dead
the line we walk is a tiny thread
weaving through others paths
and through our own head
at the time we may not understand it
we may not want it
but we must accept it

I awoke the next day
to the stroke of a cool breeze on my face
yet still held disdain
I wanted to end the pain
and the only way I knew how
was to end it all

I realized
thinking upon my laments
I was wrong

I realized
that ending my life would only cause more pain
that the delusions about how my death
was somehow for the best
were just a test
a test to see if I could reignite the fire inside my chest

I realized
that sometimes this life doesn't make any sense
it has its ups and downs
twists and turns
freezes and burns
that in the dark of the valley we don't realize the sun is shining
on the other side of the mountain lining

I realized
that there are people who love me
there are people who care
that if I would just dare to reciprocate,
it would make it so much easier to bare
the trying times that from time to time seem to stare
you down as you try to find your place in this life

I realized
that being genuine, and showing real love
to others, is really the best
way to love yourself
and that feeling you get in return
Is so much better than any
narcissistic pleasure you've ever felt

I realized
I had found my inner peace
and for the first time in my memory
I could finally say I was happy
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