<Act I>
It's probably been far too long
I've been keeping all my doors closed now
It's what you have to do
When you live inside haunted houses
Would it be different if I'd said
I wish I were haunting you

If it's not real
Turn all of my lights on

Hold my hand
And let the candlelight die

<Act II>
Sledgehammers can take the bricks out
Broken walls, unopened windows
Don' erase your pictures - just black the eyes, and hide
Cause once in a while... I see you smile
Through your pain
What are you doin'... to me

If this is real
Why are there no shadows

Turn off the lights
Hold my hand
Don' leave me alone

<Bridge>
Light
Illuminate my night

Night provide
Somewhere to find the light

<Act III>
Resigned
Satisfied
In my closed casket
It's how I'd have it

Consigned
To leave behind
Let that me die

<Break>

You planned my escape
You loved me back to life

Hold my hands
Darlings don't let go

In quicksand
We'll keep each afloat

Be my lifelines
I'll be your pilot light.

I'm not here to judge
Or to cast my aspersions
I've written my Ameri-cant
And Amerikunt versions
I'm unconvinced
That I'm still alive
But that ****** Orwell
Never wrote 1985

La la la la la
La la la la la
La la la lalla
La la la la la

It's easy to think
We deserve more than this
Epitaphs, gravestones
And **** in the sink
Obits will read
By who we're survived
Ungrateful kids
Born after 1985

La la la la la
La la la la la
La la la lalla
La la la la la

There were sunlit days
Of picnics and balconies
Christmas mornings
And final warnings
And I still remember
The last look you gave to me

And I hope
You're not watching
I cant stomach what you'd think of me
And I know
There's no "do over"
But I'm certain I'm not who I'm supposed to be

All that's left of me

I hope I made you proud
But I'm run over
A burnt picture of a kid in effigy
I took the weight
You taught me to shoulder
I got old and its got harder on my knees

I made mistakes
I'd never dreamed of
Every disappointing decision
I could make
I made my grave
And I hope I have love
To make every ******* choice
Worth its sake

And I hope
You're not watching
I cant stomach what you'd think of me
And I know
There's no "do over"
But I'm certain I'm not who I'm supposed to be

The words I seek
Just escape me
But the meaning is so clear
I try to find the right words
But those words
They disappear

So I speak to you in riddles
Because my words get in my way
I can grasp them for a moment
But they
Always fade away

I scream because
I cant trust myself
And I don't know how to speak
My breath is gone
My voice ripped out
And left bleeding at my feet

And the thoughts
They rise like water
They crest and come crashing down
So lets just sit here
Silently so
I dont have to drown
Hell no

I am nothing more than
Imprisoned in my mind
A voice I once thought reliable
Now determined to stay inside

So sit there frozen
Carved in stone
While we drift farther away
This shattered home
Is just a shallow hole
Words left ruin in their wake

Ruin in
Ruin in
Ruin in their wake

So this is what it feels like winning?
Trumpets sound our victory
I cast out your Light-bringer
So what now
Becomes of me?

You said my name is as Justice
Dared me be worthy of such a charge
I believed a divine purpose
And yet I'm blunting my sword
Is mercy blasphemy?

I've given all I have to give
For Heaven's sake
I'm not seeking your forgiveness
I won't forgive this
I dont want to see you when I wake

You pitted us brother to brother
Tested each our loyalty
Again you do to your subjects
Claiming proof of faith and fealty
- "prove your worth to me"

How can you hold any guilty
When you are pulling all the strings
Strive, struggle, and suffer
Desperation begets rotten things

If this is what's to be heaven
I wont stomach it
I exile myself in shame
For the part I played in shaping this
And Father, you stopped list'ning
But the mortals beg for you to list
If you wont hear them beg salvation
Than Father,
You can take my wings

Die not
And sleepest thou assuredly
That unto death
Still vigil willst I keep
Mighty and deadly
Whispered or strong
When before he comes to you
It is I he will meet
Poor death
Cannot come to you without
taking me
Let him come
I invite his chill breath and
Steel of sythce
On my watch no harm
Willst come to you this night

This is a show off off-broadway
Filled with prose and cause
Complicated expositions
Stranger than fiction ever was

I've auditioned a cast of characters
And never made the lead
Odd for that on these footboards
Are where they were conceived

I know this part by heart
Hell, I wrote the lines
Seeking my Euridice, my Juliet
Cursed to never find

I have no faith in critics
They rarely get the point
And in all the marvelous performances
I am still not "right"

It's gone dark inside my theater now
The cast and audience have all gone
The curtains took their final bow
I'll seek you from the balconies

I've kept the ghostlight on