Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
Don't be upset I didn't
                            wave back
  when you saw
                                                         me today.

          For I no longer see faces
                    only shadows-
                                               indistingiushable
                                               ­   from eachother.

          Drifting
    through melancholy days
                                        enduring
        unb­erable conversations
                with empty faces.

                                    Four years ago
was the last time
             I even saw my own...

                             Amazing how
            when you're no longer
                      met
                                ­           with your own
                            reflection,
            
        ­    You begin to foregt
                        who you are.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
He hit me again today,
                                                                  he tells me
                                                   he's sorry-
                      it will never happen again.
                            
                           I laugh
                                    because I know
                   it's less painful
                                            than crying.

                                                                          Who am I kidding?
                                                      I deserved it.
                                                             No.
                                             That is wrong.
  
    But if it was wrong
                     why did it feel so easy?
                                                                        If it was wrong
                                                                             why
                                                                                  am I still here
                                                          when I know
                                                                 full well
                                                   it will happen again...

        I know
when it does
            he will lie to me once more
    and swear to me
                    it will never
                           happen again.
                                              
                                                            The radio blares
                                                     is this love
                                                                               that I'm feeling?
              They will never
                         understand
           that he only hits me
                                       because
                        he loves me.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
The siren's song overwhelmed his senses,
So easily convinced he was her one and only,
A sheep in man's clothing,
Waiting eagerly to be sheared of everything he had of value,
A willing participant in his own destruction.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
You sink, even with a life jacket on,
Crying is impossible, for you cannot feel,
Everything tastes the same,
Love becomes relegated to mythology,
Even your dog frowns when you're around,
Clarity is found through darkness,
You have accepted the fact that you will never be happy,
Yet you never lose hope, for you never had any.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
**** me
           like you love me
    then leave me
                   like you freed me.

         How ironic
              these other stupid guys
    wanna be me.
                               For these few short hours
                   I'm your one and only...
                        You'll be gone before I know it
    I'm destined
                        to be lonley.

                  Building self worth
beneath the sheets
                         I always last longer
                                                when I beat
                                     my meat.

        I want to be loved
                              more than anything else.
             Can't take it much longer
          I need some help.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
Long empty hallways,
Filled with empty picture frames,
Absent from happy memories,
What joy does this empty house bring?
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
I will spit in her soup today.

        Not to be spiteful
               or malicious
                                               nor to be rude
                                                        or hateful.
     But rather because I know..
            Because I know it's the only
chance my saliva
         has to touch her lips.

                          A thought I once
believed to be so harmless
                           which has overwhelmed me
                                 to such an extent
           that I can
                 no longer
        bear it.

                              Why does she torment me?
      Her mere presence makes me sick.

                 Oh how I wish
         for just one Sunday
                            she would get lunch
        somewhere else-

     Please don't
         go
somewhere else
                     I didn't mean it.

         I need her.

                                      Oh how badly
                        I hope
She doesn't order salad.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
When all you have is hatred,
You have nothing left to lose,
And when you are forsaken,
Your best friend is the *****,
Perhaps you are mistaken,
You can always chose,
It is not too late then,
Morality is no ruse.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
***** sheets speak to his apathetic state of mind,
Why are you here? It’s clear he isn’t even trying,
He’s so high when you **** he probably thinks he’s flying,
Cab money for the ride home you spend the whole time crying,
All you wanna hear him utter is two words, your mine,
Until his lips speak those words your soul is left dying,
But who are you kidding, it’s your ***** he’s buying,
You don’t wanna believe it so you keep on denying,
So you wait outside his place, spying,
Another girl comes over, you weren’t gratifying?
**** that ***** anyway, tired of him lying.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
You're willing to give up everything knowing full well you will end up heartbroken,
You give your entire heart and it still doesn't feel like enough,
Every minute apart feels like a thousand lifetimes, but when you're together the days pass in seconds,
Everything you ever wanted in life suddenly no longer matters,
You're acting crazy, but feel oddly okay with it,
When they're around you suddenly feel like a kid again,
Nothing you do makes sense to anyone else but you understand it perfectly.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
I gave you everything,
And for what,
A few fleeting memories,
And $3.99 Hallmark cards,
Never knew my love had such little value,
And there are no returns,
My next partner will be shorted,
For I cannot get back the love I gave to you,
I know now that you didn't deserve it,
Yet the damage has already been done.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
I tried to convince myself I didn't need you,
That I was better off without you,
Yet I cannot shake this nagging emptiness inside myself,
My addiction was a blessing,
I surrender myself to you.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
So quick we are to claim there is no purpose,
As if everything happens in isolation,
It is easier for most of us this way,
Removing the notion of the soul,
Thus our basis for morality is ambiguous,
Allowing it to change at our whim,
In this mind frame self-interest rules,
There is no accountability to a higher power,
The weak prefer it this way,
They enjoy spreading their seeds of doubt,
For their strength is in others weakness,
A sad existence,
Ignoring the passion within themselves,
They love to say there is no god,
"Prove it" is the mantra of the faithless,
I ask them this,
How do the faithless prove love?
And if they can't,
Are they truly faithless?
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
He silently sympathized will all the women who he had recklessly allowed to float in and out of his life,

Completely replaceable,

As if they were nothing more than a vessel to encapsulate his sorrow,

How badly he craved that he was no such vessel for her,

But he sat there silently,

Filled with doubt,

Knowing full well that it could just as easily happen to him,

As he sat there enchanted by silent admiration he thought to himself,

True suffering can only come at the hands of those you love.
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
When I think of life without you
      I'd rather take my life.
            A whisper from inside
                  you better think twice.

                                 But I don't wanna listen
                                       I hate my own advice-

         Oh this life
              of men
                   and mice.

Shout out to the sky
     can anybody hear me?
              There is no answer
                    nobody loves me dearly...

         Mind remanining silent
               with a gun
                       to my head.

                            Maybe she'll finally
                                        love me
                                  when I'm dead.
Brandon Shane Mar 2017
To fight for the belief
that you control your own fate
To fight for tomorrow
To fight those negative feelings
To fight complacency

To fight for breakfast
the buttered- biscuit
To fight for wisdom
even if it doesn’t pay the bills

To fight for your elders
lord knows this society won’t
To fight for your family
they are all you have

To fight for morality
because the majority doesn’t determine
what’s right
To fight life--
the daily grind

To fight for love
To fight through loss

To fight against the menial and trivial
because there are so many things
in this world that really matter
To fight to understand the vast and unknowable

To fight the weather
the roads left un-iced
because you will still be getting to work on time
To fight for what’s right
so the example will be set for your children
To fight our desires
the voice in our minds we try to ignore

To fight the idea than anything is impossible
To fight mass delusion
To fight for free will
To fight indefinite servitude  
to the monetary system

To fight on Sunday then
Monday and Tuesday
To fight on Wednesday
Thursday too

To fight for getting things done on Friday
and Saturday
even if you can’t go out for some beers
To fight the misery
for it will pass
To fight for elation
because you deserve to feel it again

To fight against everyone who ever said
you couldn’t do it and prove them wrong
To fight everyone
because no one can stand in your way
To fight for the idea that you have a purpose
even if other people think they don’t
To fight for the realization that everything matters

To fight for each other

To fight for money
To fight against poverty

To fight even when you know
that you’re going to lose
To fight even the sunlight
because you are determined to shine brighter

To fight for a full moon
visible without toxic smog
To fight sleepless nights
for you have a big day tomorrow
To fight for nothingness
so you may attain inner peace

To fight for hard work
because it really does pay
To fight for more to fight
To fight fire
with fire

To fight to fight

To fight for puppies
against humane societies needles
To fight for long walks
because no matter what anyone says
they are relaxing
late at night when the streets are barren

To fight traffic
To fight that 45 minute line
for a ride you have already done twice
because it's her favorite

To fight for the notion
that every day matters
and to really believe it

To fight for the fact
that you have value
and to never forget it

To fight for duty
To fight for necessity
To fight to be your best self

To fight for to the world
because there is still good left
To serve that greater good

To fight against your own wants and desires
for life is so much more
To fight for your needs
To fight for your life
To gain everything
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
Her hands grasped violently against his face as she begged for air,
But he determined she was not worthy,
A grand mistake she had made, putting her life in his hands,
And for what? Mere ****** gratification?
For he was a foul beast,
Yet he was not a selfish lover,
As the last breath of life left her she began to ******,
Closing her eyelids he whispered lovingly into her ear, "You're welcome"
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
They smile and wave when they see you,
Surely they mean to be friends,
You are ripe with anticipation,
Eager to make their acquaintances,
This will soon fade,
For their smiles are laced with deceit,
And their true intentions, deplorable,
Your brother never was as trusting,
His gaze meets the same eyes as yours,
His stomach drops, he knows, you see it on his face,
But you are innocent, and trusting,
Your lips have never tasted heartbreak,
Offering him hope you whisper, have faith,
He lost his long ago yet perks up,
For he must be strong, for you,
They begin take him,
The only one you have in the entire world,
You cry out to them, begging them not to,
The same smiles look back at you,
But suddenly they seem cold,
Your brother is silent as they drag him off,
He can see the panic on your face,
Gathering his composure he whispers, “I believe”,
Then he is gone, and you are alone,
Even surrounded by your peers, you are alone,
And for the first time in your life you take the time to really look around,
Home isn’t home without family,
You are surrounded by a cage, a cage you never wanted to leave when he was here,
But now that you are ready to you realize you are trapped,
Not knowing what to do you curl up in to a ball and begin to cry,
Your neighbor tells you with kindness that everything will be okay,
Finally understanding what it means to lose faith you realize it won’t,
A piece of paper casually falls into this cage you once called home,
In thick black ink it reads, male Pomeranian $599
Brandon Shane Jan 2017
When I was young
so much younger than today. My independence
seemed to vanish
into the haze.

           A friend offers a flask…
oh conformity
How do you become so far reaching?

Well beyond the walls
of the western world.

Help me
    get my feet back on the ground.

Morality
sacrificed as the flask empties…
feeling nothing
unity.
The rigid and demanding world falls away.
               Oppression
                      suddenly feels distant.

Leaving behind a familiar feeling
empathy.
But now these days are gone and I’m not so self-assured.
            Won’t you
                  please
                         please
                                 help me.

— The End —