Lost among the confusion,
Convincing myself everything is real.
I don’t know whether to let it hit the floor,
Or hold it in my arms and not let go.
It’s the child we’ve had for so long.
Grown up but we still don’t recognize him.
His face is ever changing,
Never the same as it was before.
Everyday we hope its over,
And we can finally die in peace.
You always say it’ll be alright,
Everything will be okay.
But I won’t be your tiny puppet,
I’ll leave no more strings attached.
I’ll escape from this world,
The world that you’ve spun like a spider.
Widows always were the most deadly.
Tell me what will you do once I’m gone?
Move on like it didn’t happen,
Like it was all a dream?
Well it was for me at first,
Before when I was so naïve
But I’m awake now,
I can see you.
I can see you standing over me,
Sharpening your knife.
Waiting for the moment,
The perfect moment to sink it in.
Watch me wither away,
Until I’m nothing more but a memory.
And watch that memory fade as well,
Until there’s nothing left of me.
See what you can do,
See the power that you have?
You made me give up everything,
In exchange for my worst fear.
I gave it all to you,
My time, my care, my trust, my love,
And what you gave me was a lie.
The first poem i ever wrote. My sophomore year of high school.