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Some say
Home isn’t a place
May be they’re right
Or maybe they aren’t
I really don’t know
But right now
Cooped up in this ***** little two feet bathroom stall
With the sweat gluing our bodies together
The sweat that keeps pouring out in buckets
As you try to put my hands in places
Where  I don’t want to put them
Right now, as I cling desperately to you
To change the colour of your eyes
Right now, this is home
This ***** little two feet bathroom stall
Where there is nothing but two people
Two people who just can’t seem to keep their hands off each other
And every time you try to put my hands in places
Where I don’t want to put them
I wish
I so fervently wish
That I knew what I was wishing for
We touch
And kiss
And feel each other in so many ways
That at the end of it all
We don’t have anywhere to touch but our hearts
For some reason we never get there
And I can’t say that I’m sorry
But I can’t say that I’m not sorry either
If my body was me
Then you would love me
But the thing that I want to know most
Even more than how to fly
Is if God suddenly changed his mind about my face
About my nose, my lips and my little brown *******
That you seem to like so much
If God suddenly changed his mind about my flesh
Then would the dingy two feet bathroom stall still be home?
And would you still try to put my hands
In places where I don’t want to put them?
And would I still want to change the colour of your eyes
More than anything else in the world?
I would like to think that I would
Sometimes it’s okay to float on the surface of things
It’s okay to pig out on ice cream and watch chick flicks that you know you won’t think twice about once they’re over.
It’s okay to scream the loudest at a rock concert
when some part of you longs to hear Mozart’s soothing strains again
It’s okay to smile at someone randomly, even though you know you’ll probably
Never see them again in your life
It’s okay to spend hours lost
With only thoughts, dreams and precious memories keeping you company
It’s okay to not have any trust to give out
It’s okay to be a little selfish and tell people
That you just can’t handle hearing about their problems at the moment
It’s okay to call up an old friend you haven’t spoken to in years
And cry your heartstrings dry
It’s okay to stop calling someone who meant the world to you
Simple because you can’t deal with having an emotional trip
Every time you hear their voice
It’s okay not to feel anything
When you hear a song you used to love play on the radio
It’s okay not to have things to write about
Unless they’ve been assigned as homework
It’s okay to wear ratty t-shirts and worn jeans
And put on a little weight that some people think looks good on you
Because frankly speaking, you couldn’t care less
It’s okay to not be perpetually chirpy
When inside, you feel numb every moment
Sometimes it’s okay to just be that girl
Even though the truth is
You’re so much more than that
Sometimes
It’s the only way to live
// one of those things when you don't really know if you're really the one writing it
People say that sticks and stones
May break your bones
But words can never hurt you
It's a lie
A **** ****** lie
Words are the worst things
Ever invented by mankind
They can breaks you
Into such minute particles
That are virtually impossible to reassemble
They can make you feel
Like there is no point to life
Words can manifest never ending tears
That flow in such copious amounts
That you never knew existed within you
In short, words can damage you
In irreversible ways
Words
I just hate them
I hear the train in the distance
The clank of metal speech
Grazing over roads that have known better days
I hear the rasping cries of the conductor
As he calls out the names of places
Places where I might or might not want to be
I hear the whistle, a knife through the air
I hear the train in the distance
And I close my eyes
Trying so hard to forget all those treasures
All those picayune sparkles
That used to be everything for me
Keeping up my endeavour
To forget everything
But the train in the distance
I stand
With a smile that’s been there
Just there
For so long
That it’s ancient with the lines of stagnancy
I stand
And just like always
I do the right thing
Even if it might not be
The right thing for me
// Heartstrings once broken can never be put back together again
Have you ever felt lonely in a crowd?
I have
Believe me, it's not a nice feeling
Everyone is standing all around you
With joyful smiles pasted on their faces
And then, BOOM!
Suddenly, you're all alone
Now don't get me wrong
It's not like I fear solitude
Sometimes it feels wonderful
To be all alone
With only your thoughts and dreams
As faithful companions
But being alone doesn't translate
To being lonely
And when it does
You know you've got a problem
Tomorrow when the world is supposedly going to end
All those pseudo comrades
Will separate out into iron bound clusters
Unbreakable in their nature
But, there will be one person
Left without a place to stand
A hand to hold
An embrace to return
No prizes for guessing this one folks
May this is a temporary condition
May be my number just isn't up
In this country
Which is supposed to be my motherland
But seldom feels like it
May be God has so many wishes to grant
That he just forgot about mine
May be it's not my fault
And things will be different someday
May be there are people on this earth
Who feel just the same way
May be, just may be
Loneliness doesn't last forever
Written on the day before the world was supposed to end as we know it.....
He fell from the sky
I wasn’t looking for anything but solitude
But he fell from the sky
And refused to let me out of his sight
He refused to let me cry my silent tears
Wrapping my misery in balloons
And letting his fingers fall away
Watching as they soared up high into oblivion someday
For him life wasn’t a word
But a song to be sung everyday
In new and everlasting ways
Plucking my heartstrings as he strummed his way
Into my broken and mangled life
Where nothing ever seemed to play
The right notes of the day
He ****** out all the bad dreams
And breathed in hope of a new life
Filled with things that may or may not happen
He taught me how to smile again
With my favourite dimple peeking out
When I screamed and ranted
About things beyond his control
He kissed me
And suddenly
If only for a moment
I felt like what I felt mattered
I felt like my poems were good
Really good
So good that may be someone else
Might want to read them one day
Someone else who doesn’t have someone like him
He fell from the sky
And taught me how to let everything go
Not for others
But for myself
He showed me what music looks like
He made me realize
That I do want forever
No matter how much I said I didn’t
He fell from the sky
And I don’t think I’ll ever be the same any more
For the person beyond special who made me realize what iris meant
The music plays incessantly
The book lies open in front of my eyes
All around
The peaceful feeling that always comes
With the end of a day
Wraps around me like a patchwork quilt
That changes colours at frequent intervals
The book lies open in front of my eyes
But all I can think of is you
I close my eyes
And I see your face
I see every facet of the face
That grows dearer to me
With every passing hour
I close my eyes
And I feel like I can almost feel the taste of your lips on mine
But when I reach out to pull you close
You disappear
And I am lost yet again
In the oceans of oblivion
I swim vociferously
Desperately trying to find my way back to you
Because somewhere deep down inside of me
I know
That no matter what island I finally land on
You will be there waiting
With your arms wide open
My heart finds strength with this knowledge
And I keep you in my heart always
For the mind may forget
But the heart always remembers..
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