You try so hard to forget what is happening before your very own eyes.
When the subject is brought about in conversation you convince yourself it's all lies.
Knowing that if it is possible you really have a future you will still always be in denial.

Why would you want to put me through that?
You know who you are.
I try and try to forgive and forget.

I actually forget the seriousness of all of the abuse.
Mental or physical. Whatever, it's all the same.

Why would anyone want to be with you if you can't handle your own carnage?
What is it that you think would make it worth being with you?
I find you to be completely ridiculous.

Why would you attempt to put me through this?
Breaking me down through you own subjugation.
You don't even know what love is.

The whole reason we live is to learn.
I've learned that I am the happiest when I am with people that I love.
If I can't be with the people who love me then I should love the people around me as much as I can for as long as it is good for me.
The light from the stars is delayed for a reason.
The point of life is to learn lessons, if you can't do that you will have missed everything.

After allowing your whole life to slip away
It so easy to let things go.
Go they must because that is all you know.
You lost your soul you left it
you left it with him.
You lost it to your own tears. You left all of your friends.
Those who once loved you now wonder who you are.
And you see again blindly staring at your self-inflicted scars.

Relentlessly holding me by you with your crooked love and twisted tales.
Your stupid smile, and your beautiful eyes.
I know it was never your intention to treat me badly.
But you did, and I've had it.
There's no way I could stay.
What would be the point?
The price I have to pay just to satisfy your sarcastic lewdness.
You say there cannot be any God.
But with me, you would like to see it.
I read right through your lies but loved you enough
to try to stay with you.

Everything I hear you say meant to be sweet now just sounds like sarcasm.
Keeping what I have seen secret
I can't feel it out.
When I can't even hold you tight because I know I've been mistreated.
You have the audacity to point your finger in blame at me
when all along you've done the same.
I just don't know where to start.
You took something beautiful and melted it to a pointed in and left it in the banks of my bleeding heart.
I feel like such a fool.
I seen you kissing her.
The happy look on her face similar to my own.
I think it is possible to forgive someone as you have said you have forgiven me.. but I don't really believe that.
That you ever forgave me.
I have let go so many times leaving the hatred still in my heart.
Now when I look at you I get sick to my stomach and I want to rip her ******* eyes out.
"Friends" huh?
I guess that's all.

How deep is you love for me?
Even if it was an impossibility would you still try or would you lay down and die?
Can you imagine what kind of future you have in my eyes?
Can you endure the temptations of the Earth and stay true to me?
What would you do for me?
If you couldn't have me would you go crazy or would you live on for me?
Do you know that I love you?
I would never pursue anyone other than you.
I just have to know that you live for me and will die with me.
As slow and painful as it may seem,  I would still want to spend every moment of hell with you.
Do you wish you could spend an eternity just staring into my eyes?
Separating yourself from yourself just to get into my mind.
Looking past all my imperfections just because you love time when you are with me.
I know I could spend every waking moment of my life with you and I don't want to do it without you.
                              Love you.

Sometimes I don't know if I should cry my eyes out, cut my wrists, or cut my eyes out so I never have to see you again.
Sometimes I just can't hold it in.
The pain I feel is real.
I love you enough to let you hurt me over and over...
Again, I need a friend.
Sometimes you say I am selfish and snappy.
Those are the times when you can't even make me happy.
I don't see why you don't understand when I tell you it hurts.
You just keep on and find a way to make it worse.
I don't even know,
who lied to who first?
You seem to know just fine,
you like seeing my face rubbed in dirt.
How many times will I ask myself why?
I know I'm disarranged and you're no better.
Sometimes I can't see
how we are ever happy together.
It's deeper than you.
And me.
There is no looking up.
We are covered distilled in concrete and glass,
we have to pick at each other just to see.
Maybe one day we'll recognize each others pain.
And stop ripping and tearing, layers from our skin.

Breathe in, Breathe out.
Be quiet, and shout.
Let me in, push me out.
Help me figure out what life is all about.
Have me with you, then let me go.
Love me forever,
be my fiend, be my foe.
Treat me well, be forever still.
Bring me to life, lay me down to ****.
Die just a little bit,
live to be free.
Treat me as a treasure, I am your distant dream.
I'll always be your lover,
tell me I'll always be your friend.
Pray for our death, it can't hurt in the end.
I'll always forgive you, as I do still.
Do as you want, but I need you to please my will.
Be there for me, get out of my way.
When I say leave, I need you to stay.
Keep me in your mind,
keep me on your time.
Don't let me out of your sight until you're old and blind.
I need you to be there,
I need you to be here.

Speak of me softly,
say my name with lust.
I'll be there when everything is fixed,
I'll be there when it busts.
I'll love you when you're full of passion,
I'll love you when you're dust.
I'll love you when you're far away,
being with you is simply a must.
I do not see the end...
the beginning is still here.
I'll love you throughout our lives.
I'll see you through our fears.
Throughout all of our troubles,
I'll hold you tight and close.
And the hopeful look in your eyes is what I miss the most.