when the
air stands still
overhead
- stale in 112 -
nothing happening
everywhere a
stand-still like
a bright room
all the cockroaches already
ran out of
the unchallenged fluorescence
freakish & bizarre
riding rascal scooters

holding in
your breath only seems natural offensive to
stir
a sea of death

living and dying
are often paired
up
living condemned by optimists
proudly dying "is living"

cherish instead
those bold cynics
above
such rationalization
content to push death
as
far
from
living
as means make available

always-too-cold-metal-handle
the refrigerator door
opens with an elastic jolt
never easy
always excessive
violence pressed deep
into squeezed palm
whether you go:
slow or fast;
never easy
whether:
anticipation ****
and  rip through
resistance;
or tear slow with quiet tenderness
pops

this can't help but leave you
a savage.

Bukowski
you poor tortured soul
you saw the truth
that life must be simply
endured
the woman doesn't call
the neighbor dies
patience
have a smoke
wait for the settling of things
in the bottom of your
whiskey glass

given enough time
we're all dead
let it sink into you
the worms and the dirt

stretching between the hands of a clock
eternity and oblivion
turn on the tv and shut it off again
let boredom arrest you
breathing on your neck

the moments between you
and the last woman
you had
felt and unfelt

another will be along for you
or you will be dead

Women walk
through my life
tourists
never to stay a
passing fancy to
tell their friends about
over brunch
after yoga
I read a book that
told me to live in the moment
so I don't really need
more than a couple weeks
and a warm bed
slowly gone cold

"How are you
doing?"
is a **** hard question to
answer
Do you tell them about the girl
who didn't text you
back or the one
that did?
How about the weather?
it has been very nice out

next week doesn't look so good
should go hiking
more

it was a long day at
work
but you did hot yoga
Twice this week
and paid your student loan
only a week late

is it important that you're
sitting on the couch in
your sweats-
staring at the state of your life.

Icarus is burning
and blind

plummeting

tumbling

smiling
.

my heart sings
in the smile
on her face
laughing how
I imagine the Buddha would
laugh
with the whole universe
Ohming
-
drawn from the diaphragm
by the mouth
through the lips
and back
upon
-
sunshine
kissing her face
as a lover returning home
100 million miles alone
in the deep down knowing Faith
that love can save us
-
child who watches
the stars at night
held by the whole universe
mother's tears anoint
their brave face
full
-
dance with me in
love
-