isn’t the idea of a mortal soul

the greatest contradiction of all, ever?

what could be more immortal?

need saving less? I don’t know if I’ll

live forever, but we have eternity to find out...

Love, though, she will.

the feeling in your feet

one tucked under

tight knees, stiff back.

shoulders tensed, 

head clear, eyes tired.



eyes open, lips curled,

full lungs.



Heart racing, adrenaline.

nails biting, teeth tearing.

ribs crack, muscle rips,

blood sprays, red drips.



they must die

when they jump.



knees buckle, brow

sweats, last breath.

Oversized coat
he’ll never grow into.

Pants tight at the waist
from sleeping too much.

A long time since normal
confident, awake, happy He.

The perks and flowersmith
constant, ready. Steady.

Involuntarily replacing his young
with his new old.
Sleep comes easy
in this winter’s cold.

He kept me alive
and didn’t remember my name
mike, at the sandwich shop
sessions of bean-spilling
make me tired of crying.
Meditation, deep breathing
still tired, still here.

Who will he save,
know, teach, forget
in the next year?
Anyway, thanks to him
I’m here.

How can I ever learn
if I’ve never known a thing;
carry a tune
without breath to sing?

How can I re-brick
what was never lain;
know this emptiness
without a name?

What more am I than plant food
walking seeds, feet the wind
senses for suffering,
growth, love and sins.

My cotton heart
holds no heat;
brain and fingertips:
fat and meat.

What path to take
when there’s a chance
that I’ll stray to earth, buried
without a last first dance.

Make a grammar in my mind
to hold what I see fair:
love, hope, smiles, touch,
red, blond, brown hair.

Whose hair is mine?
Where did I get my eyes;
tongues, shields, gold and fire-
which banners rippled in their skies?

How long to live!
A rare, fragile find.
All I know so far...
Each birthday is a scar.

Tony said
to really graduate
you have to be broken
from the heart out
once, really smashed.

I think that’s fair
but what if
the heart, say, of
a friend
was breaking right
up until the end,
only he dodged?
Was he, that friend I know,
ever really there? Was she?
How many hearts will it be?
Do I count? No?
But mine breaks a little
every time too. A little more
And I’ll break through.
Not for a while -
it’s still hard to smile.

it’s something
to admit it for once
not for all,
just you there.
but it’s been around
so long I can’t say
how easy
this will be
to share with you.
but it’s coming
out with a smirk
not guilty or mean
but obvious, true
the secret is:
they weren’t new.
those songs I shared
have been mine for a while
girl after girl
smile after smile.