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829 · Oct 2013
Gone
Becca Oct 2013
you can't see
she's dead inside
been strong for too long
she wonders what it's like to give up
take a few steps
jump
fall
break
just a few seconds
in front of a train

a few cuts where nobody sees
takes the pain away
but she can't breathe
another one
three to bring luck
it's the last time


she meant it.

she can't open her eyes
she can hear the sirens
"Please don't get in time"
she prays
now her mama is crying
her brother still wonders why
her father is dying
and everybody loves her
and everybody misses her

they're just lying
she whispers to herself before walking away
it's easy to pretend now that I'm gone
I wish you had said all those things to make me feel strong,
I'm sorry for not feeling sorry
alittle too late now

I wish I wasn't so good at lying
I felt broken and sore
I cried black tears on the kitchen floor
I fell
you didn't catch me in time
and now you watch me
and there's nothing but fresh tears in your eyes and dark ones around mine
745 · Oct 2013
made
Becca Oct 2013
I am made of red lipstick and brewed coffee at four in the morning
I am made of hidden scars and kisses    
under bleachers
I am made of black tights and short skirts
I am made of drugstore make up and hickeys
I am made of city lights and stiletto heels
And a bit of acid
I am made of free shots of love and unspoken 'I love you's'
I am made of sad tears and fake smirks
I am made of poetry and dusty furniture no one will ever clean
439 · Oct 2013
Dark Butterflies
Becca Oct 2013
I told u I was trouble
I told I was pain
you told me that you loved me
and promised you would stay

I'm lying under paper stars
the knots in my stomach
are  like dark butterflies
In a cold night
I was left by the door
you told me it was all too much
"I can't do this anymore"
and I watched you go away
you left as quickly as you came

now I still sleep at the right side of the bed
and I ran my fingers on the sheets
where once your body laid
I wonder why
I still leave room for you, sweet lover

all the pain
every crack of our memories
spinning around my head
I know they will come back
but why don't you bring them back?

I'm lying under paper stars
the knots in my stomach
are like dark butterflies
In a cold night
I was left by the door
you told me it was all too much
too heavy
"I can't do this anymore"
I'm not ready
and I watched you go away
you left as quickly as you came
411 · Oct 2013
Glory Days
Becca Oct 2013
I've been thinking about all the skies I've been under
and now my head is spinning
and I'm feeling sick
and that's  how I felt
when I fell for you
but I'm not falling
I have both feet on the cold floor of my hotel room
at 3 in the afternoon

I'm all alone
I need you so much closer
more than you'll ever know
I need you now
I just need you to know
that I love you so

I bet you're driving too fast
or staring at the stars like we used to do
our glory days I must say
they're behind me they are chasing me
these memories keep hunting me
and it's ever darker
now that you're not here
368 · Oct 2013
ask
Becca Oct 2013
ask
They asked me how it was like to fall in love
I told them it was beautiful
Like autumn leaves on the pavement
They asked me how it was like when you kissed me
I told them it was warm
just like summertime
They asked me how it felt when you left me
And I told them it was just like winter
Cold and lonely talks while laying on an empty bed
And now they keep asking how I am
And I keep saying  that I'm fine
I keep asking to myself
what went wrong
But I don't know
And nobody does
And everything spins
And you're not around me
And the lost words in my head don't fit together anymore
And the broken cracks of my heart are still laying on the floor
And there's no rhyme or sound
Coming out of my mouth
Since you walked out the door
If you wake up this morning
Not knowing who is laid down beside you
Or where you are
Don't look for me
I am not coming back
But if you wake up alone
And find out that you miss me
I won't mind opening the front door for you to enter
And even if you don't wake up this morning
With the thought of me on the back of your mind
I won't surrender
I won't mind
325 · Oct 2013
Untitled
Becca Oct 2013
They asked me how it was like to fall in love
I told them it was beautiful
Like autumn leaves on the pavement
They asked me how it was like when you kissed me
I told them it was warm
just like summertime
They asked me how it felt when you left me
And I told them it was just like winter
Cold and lonely talks while laying on an empty bed
And now they keep asking how I am
And I keep saying  that I'm fine
I keep asking to myself
what went wrong
But I don't know
And nobody does
And everything spins
And you're not around me
And the lost words in my head don't fit together anymore
And the broken cracks of my heart are still laying on the floor
And there's no rhyme or sound
Coming out of my mouth
Since you walked out the door
If you wake up this morning
Not knowing who is laid down beside you
Or where you are
Don't look for me
I am not coming back
But if you wake up alone
And find out that you miss me
I won't mind opening the front door for you to enter
And even if you don't wake up this morning
With the thought of me on the back of your mind
I won't surrender
I won't mind
319 · Oct 2013
Stay
Becca Oct 2013
was it some kind of war that brought you here
or were you just trying to find yourself
and ended up finding me
was it a dream you've been chasing
that made you run away from me?
please don't lock the door
I swear I'm almost coming back home
please don't get into that plane
just stay
and I will **** all of your demons
I will hunt all of your ghosts away
I just want to keep you close
promise me you'll stay

— The End —