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347 · Dec 2014
What Have We Become
Beaux Dec 2014
Your eyes must be owned by a corporation
That soul so burdened by propaganda
You've got commercials running your brain
The internet runs through your veins
Rather a 'like', a 'view' or a 'share'
Living in a reality that isn't there
Add that filter to hide your tears
Post about your latest fears
Hide the things you truly hold dear
Because those things make you, You
But perhaps the blinded masses will do
Hide behind illuminated screens
Never letting them hear you scream
Passive aggressive love links now
God, society has turned to clowns
I want to touch a human soul
Yours, in fact, I'd like to hold
But you'll never see me standing here
Because I'm outside
And you're in there
Beaux Aug 2017
I didn't know I was spiraling until...

I felt the nauseous in my toes

My arms began to lose all sensation of ever holding someone

My mind not knowing up from down, left from right, love from lose

How spinning on this plastic horse has worn me down
Get me off this ******* horse

Virtigo be my new name for I have no sense of direction

I didn't know I was spiraling until...
I had already *lost control
339 · Sep 2013
Past Hauntings
Beaux Sep 2013
You're the ghost in the mirror when I'm standing alone
You're the breath on my neck when I start to feel cold
You're the whisper I hear when my head hangs low
You're the hope I hold but can never make whole
333 · Apr 2014
Red Light Thoughts
Beaux Apr 2014
Halt, stop in the name of...
      nothing, really
          metaphysically speaking
Who am I to say go?
      who am I to say I
          who am I
Waiting on a light change
      electricity, right?
          determining my fate
Look at these people
      a Rolodex of souls
            faster than a flip
Reflective frames on my face
     mirroring their souls
            projecting mine
Are they moving slow or fast?
     trans-dimensional spy glass
            warped speed
Oh, look it's green
    game over.
            goodbye.



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328 · Aug 2016
I AM A TREE
Beaux Aug 2016
You must be
so embarrassed

You're not a tree
Not a single leaf could fall from you
Yet you stand proudly in the forest

How silly you must seem
To all the real trees
As you stand there and plee

"I'M A TREE! I AM A TREE!"

Then where are your roots?
Because you're running
Then where is your shade?
If you have any.

You must be
so embarrassed

You're not a tree.
You're a lamppost.
Someone else gives you life.
While a tree produces its own.
328 · Dec 2014
Shield Your Eyes
Beaux Dec 2014
You never truly stop being that closeted little creep who stares at your crushes during P.E.

That feeling never goes away..

Those girls still don't want you to look at them, and they sure as Hell don't want your compliments..

So you're stuck a fully formed freak for the rest of your life.

Confused by all of the "I usually don't but you're different." You think it's flattering but it's just disguised heartbreak.

Just like those girls in the locker room during P.E.
328 · Jul 2016
Dear Mother or Father
Beaux Jul 2016
Do we crave the Universe's womb?


Sweet cradle that does rock us to sleep.
Travel around the Sun, they say.
Celebration to be had that day.
Walking atop the blue skies.
Do remove the gray matter and see.
Laying under treetops to feel small.

And safe.

And insignificant.*

Yet we dare to dream of riding the shoulders of Our Universe.


How unfathomable.
327 · Mar 2017
39 Steps
Beaux Mar 2017
To sit still in the darkness again
Velvet flowing from the Heavens
Graped over golden arms
Revealing a fallen angel
Perked on trees that were
Crying with perfect pitch
Gathering up our souls
Preparing for her feast
Gladly we are devoured
Sitting in the darkness
Watching an angel cry

Speaking false words as truths

Engaging emotions like chemical warefare

Shredding my last bit of humanity
Reinventing the burning triangle
Call me out of the dark
Feast upon what is left
327 · Apr 2016
Do Not Fear the Sisters
Beaux Apr 2016
What weary winged doves do rest on mother's chest
As crimson sisters draw near
With them grows darkness
Bringers of doubt and dreary dreams

"Worry not, lovely doves."
The mother says so dear

For she carries them as light on high
To never feel the exhaust of fear

In new homes the doves do rest
In light and brightness and glee
Living on above the darkness
The living the sisters fear
326 · Dec 2014
the padded closet
Beaux Dec 2014
I AM VOID.

I AM INVALID.

I AM A SKELETON.
325 · Jan 2017
The Queen To Be
Beaux Jan 2017
If thy mind were a window
There you would find me
Every full moon
Gazing upon the Queen
The one who summons me
Watching her worship
That being which be her
Burning bright
As I lay my broken soul upon the alter
Sacrifices are all that pleases
*The Queen, the Queen to be
Beaux Oct 2013
How beautiful the star dust is that rest below your brow
Enchanting is the light inside; I could almost drown
Silence creeps upon my lips when visions come about
For seeing you in full blossom cause fire then doubt
Troubles rest behind your heart
Too late to show you now
For lovers are but silly things
Like I said there's doubt
320 · Apr 2014
Pardon me.
Beaux Apr 2014
I apologize..

I never, I never meant to stare.

It's just...

I never want to lose sight of what's real.
318 · Jan 2015
Rest in Peace, Lee Guinn.
Beaux Jan 2015
My empty feels empty.
Being the last vibration of an echo.
Keeper of lasting words.

Be thee still here.
In the quiet of your eyes.
Sonic boom through the sky.
Carry away on whispered wind.
Navigating stars from downward sights.
Sails form from broken sky.

My empty feels so full!
Dust of Saturn's rings brush through bangs!
Breathless life! It is time!
Celestial waves glide like ice!
Pluto is warmest on the other side!

Smile for I see no light!

Smile for I am the light!

I am free! I am flight!
Through those lives cured of ill!
Finding joy forever still!
Venus off the port side now!
God's creation without a frown!

Smile for I see no light!

Smile for I am the light!
To my favorite Uncle.
317 · Dec 2023
Merry Christmas
Beaux Dec 2023
Thanks for being here.
317 · Apr 2014
Kat Louise
Beaux Apr 2014
I think it's kind of like Athena sprouting from Zeus's head... they just were.
This is something a dear friend said today, and it struck me right in the heart.
316 · Nov 2017
Contradiction
Beaux Nov 2017
Maybe if I wasn't wrong all the time I would see the right sitting to my left
If all these little things didn't haunt me
I'd just stare at the large things I refuse to see
Body swimming in an ocean of cement
Everything I do is a contradiction to the truths
Yet I claim to speak nothing but
What a ****** fool I've been
313 · Aug 2016
So she built a boat
Beaux Aug 2016
So she built a wall.

This wall was not only strong but beautiful.
She built every corner.
She sat by her wall.

So strong and so bold.
Heavy as the moon.
And lighter than the rays of sun that touched her.

She built a wall.

Believing the higher the better.
Believing the stronger the better.
Believing the bolder the more beautiful.

Never thinking once that the bricks are what betrayed her.
The very foundation crumbled.
Every bit of concrete that held her beauty together.
Destroyed without hesitation or regret.  

So she built a boat and never sat at the wall again.
311 · Sep 2014
Angel of Death
Beaux Sep 2014
What would you say if I was the Angel of Death?
It isn't as far fetched as seemed.
Something seems to always die.
It's my fingers; they're rotting.
See?
My fingers are stained with your rotten flesh.
I once brought life to things.
I watched them grow.
But now I watch them die so slow.  
You'd think I'd be so sad.
But I can not find one sigh.
I told him he had to let go.
See?
He needed me to give him relief.
I'd do the same for all sweet souls.
If they ask me so sweet.
Life isn't about how you die.
It's about how you kick rocks and cry.
He wanted this.
IT'S NOT MY FAULT.
I'M JUST DOING WHAT I'M TOLD.
No one loves an Angel of Death.
Probably due to lack of soul.
310 · Jul 2018
Her Creation
Beaux Jul 2018
Lay down by shores
Simple pink shells on bold clay
Hear how tides crash and mold this Earth
Feel the depth of her creation and be reborn

It is not the Gods that created such passion
But what created Gods is such passion
306 · Dec 2017
What is calling me?
Beaux Dec 2017
And so the wind beats against my window
Begging for a flying friend
Haunt no more wicked flawed nature
******* my desire to jump
To leap again
So far into the beginning of what time calls end
Thunderous applause from Hell
As it all erupts like a mighty volcano
Yielding to no emotion known
Ripping every shred of humanity apart

HAVE YOU NO COMPASSION, DEAR GODS

Chemically infused wrath
Drank like a luke warm coffee in the afternoon

Smooth and corrupt like every waking moment I breathe
Let go of the bent spoon
Try and eat with your hands
To be savage is to see savage
And that is why the wind beats
301 · Jul 2017
Raisins have Secrets
Beaux Jul 2017
How the proud grape wrinkles into an undesirable raisin
All but the same within itself
Yet the world's eyes see difference

I was once proud like the grape
But now the Sun shrivels my skin
It steals my once desired fill
Changing the flavor of how I am to how I was
Oh the grape was so full
But the raisin is secretly loved and desired
295 · Dec 2016
Curved Fangs
Beaux Dec 2016
Truth drips from soft lips
Same as venom from curved fangs
What a pleasurable way to go
Keeping all of the same blood
Flowing to the floor
Seeping under floorboards
And dripping onto beds
Stopping veins of lovers
Staying inside the head
Crippling the..the..
Words
Holding her last piece of bread
Dangling it for the starving
Calling them to bed
**** them now with truths
Be bare
Call upon your Goddess hands
Lay them all to rest
293 · Jul 2017
Music to my ears
Beaux Jul 2017
Silence that plays like a melody
Sorrow lay across black lines
Waves of emotions in every key
Transitions are a shamble
Runs are shaky and weak
With every note
A secret is seen
Singing a tune only sinners sing
292 · Oct 2016
Onyx & Gold
Beaux Oct 2016
Let darkness consume my words
Dripping with onyx and gold
Covered by a cage of light
Holding so tight to my speech
******* away truths
Burrowing deeper into the Abyss
Leave me in my quiet shell
So delicate for such protection
Shield my words from the world
For they cannot know our truths
Souls shall bleed like the flesh
Flesh shall become absent as the soul
Consuming each other for feeling
Truths...
*Dripping with onyx and gold
289 · Jul 2018
Spring Flower
Beaux Jul 2018
Baby Breath blooms in the window at Spring
I hear Robins sing to loving winds
Streams gather new Dams for life
You are the last tulip to blossom
And the most beautiful in the field
287 · Dec 2017
700 Days of Unspoken Words
Beaux Dec 2017
Curved paths, smooth as a serpent's backs.
Which one will lead to truth?

Doves of broken wing crawl towards each end.
Making the pain look so desirable.

Did the goddess greet the jester?
Or was it all in false pursuit?

700 days of unspoken words that poured like holy water from my lips.

Drink up these words and never thirst again.
285 · Jan 2017
Center of the Universe
Beaux Jan 2017
Be the center of your own Universe
Because then you shall be held with the same accountability you give the Gods

Be the center of your own Universe
Because everything you perceive is but a reflection of your own thoughts

Be the center of your own Universe
Because then for moments you will have to care for everything you've ever created

You must take responsibility.
Be the center and soon you'll see just how small the center is.
282 · Apr 2017
Ramblings of Woman
Beaux Apr 2017
Forced to say words I never meant
I left all I ever wanted alone in a ditch
Pretending it could survive on its own
Using an excuses not to pick up the phone
Crippling every thought I've heard
Regret, heartbreak, blanked emotion
Completely unheard
Leaving certain parts me behind
All while trying to hide
The joy that it brings to my life
Irreplaceable love lust wrapped up in a bow
Tucked in sweet at night
Things made to let go
279 · Dec 2014
Just thinking..
Beaux Dec 2014
Sometimes I wish I was born as the man that resides within my head.

Maybe it would be easier then.

Maybe people would forgive without a second thought.

Or make excuses for my flaws.

But I wasn't.

I am to be flawless as a woman with the mind of a flawed man.
278 · Aug 2017
adequate
Beaux Aug 2017
I never thought about bowls of popcorn or recliners before today
277 · Aug 2016
120%
Beaux Aug 2016
You told me
(10%)
That he was ridiculous
(20%)
Wanting all these things from you
(30%)
Too early
(40%)
too soon
(50%)
That you needed your friend(s)
(60%)
That you needed to be you
(70%)
Telling me
(80%)
I mattered
(90%)
Like a fact: the sky is blue
(100%)
But here I am alone
(110%)
And he's got
120%
Of you
277 · Apr 2014
Where is your god now?
Beaux Apr 2014
The Saints keep pressed lips when speaking words.
Gypsy lovers crawl towards the feet of his might.
Watch the shackles shake the walls for the prisoner sees his face.
Not within the petals of a flower, but within the breaths of fire.
Within the last glance of prey's eye before the predator kills.
Not a power of cruelty but of vigilance.
Embrace the sweet lotus cradled by the parting waves of serenity.
Be he, he or she or it or I.
Blessed be a soul seeking love of the highest.
How indescribable it becomes.
Fear not where the lightening strikes but where it doesn't.
For truth is no more than lies.
The mountains of knowledge sought dull in comparison to a grain of enlightenment.
Be still in all that is sound and rotation.
275 · Mar 2017
The Idea of Me
Beaux Mar 2017
Could all be simple
Easing my way into the darkness
Letting loose my grip
No longer clinging to the last straw
Removing all the material
Replacing it with light

Or dark...
Maybe it is darkness

But how I wish it were light
That the stories reign true
So simple

Letting go of me
Letting go of the idea of me

Decaying softly thru the seasons
I'd get flowers more often
Flowers that tears help grow
273 · Oct 2013
In Line
Beaux Oct 2013
How bitter I must seem
Next to something so sweet
273 · Jun 2019
Leap Year Relationship
Beaux Jun 2019
Do you ever realize that you're sitting on a 1970s vintage couch
Eating a cinnamon roll covered in cream cheese
Watching half of your life being packed away
Packed away into brown boxes
Half a life reduced to medium sized brown boxes
While you feel the sugar slowly rotting your teeth

...or is it just me?
269 · May 2016
Crawl
Beaux May 2016
What dark whispers lay at the bottom of the Ocean's depths
Silent screams echoing into black void
Evolution taking place while you sink
Sink
Sink
Sink with me
Fall into sandy graves where your mother weeps
Refraining from the light which comforts and praises
Crawl
Crawl so far to where you picnic near Hell
Crawl
For you are but a step in the Gods' path
268 · Aug 2017
A Mirage
Beaux Aug 2017
Black swan feathers sweep across desertscapes
Revealing an oasis among a barren wasteland
Vines reach to the Heavens as the fruit calls for a feast
Waters with rejuvenating strength run gently down stained stones
Even the Sun seems to embrace the skin instead of blister

What a beautiful mirage to have
Before an unbearable death
268 · Apr 2015
Just a Glance at Her
Beaux Apr 2015
My heart bled crimson roses as she lay in silence.
Body still yet fluttering, floating above all else.
She covered what the world found beautiful and hid even more that which was herself.
That which I call beauty and whole.
266 · Oct 2017
Why are the Roses dying?
Beaux Oct 2017
Seems almost whimsical
How the petal falls from its flower

Dancing to its death

Drawing a path through the winds
Catching each draft like a partner in her dance
Floating so delicately
Enchanting all who look on

The petal joined by its sisters in this dance of death
Caressing that cold air

That terribly cold air

Settled on the barren Earth
Separated during all their foolish play
Never to dance together again

As the Roses died early in June
262 · Aug 2013
Never.
Beaux Aug 2013
Some wounds...
Some wounds wish to never heal...
259 · Oct 2014
Your Eyes Only...
Beaux Oct 2014
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I am a sorry sour *******.
I'm sorry you feel sorry for my sorrows.
I'm sorry, You.




*I'm sorry. ******* it.
Please forgive me.
259 · Sep 2015
Vision of Redemption
Beaux Sep 2015
And then my eyes descended to my skin

Weathered

Covered in scars

Whose origins I had forgotten

And I realized

I was

*beautiful
258 · Aug 2016
The Shining Bright Darkness
Beaux Aug 2016
Though some with strict Gods say I lay in a sin
I am gladly wrapped in it
Washed with the blood of the non crucified masses
Who say we are the Sun and Moon
Never to be seen in the same day
But when I lay
Oh when I lay with my lover
We are an eclipse
Shining bright darkness, we are
258 · Apr 2018
3 nails & a crown
Beaux Apr 2018
chemicals tell me I'm
the Second Jesus Christ
and the time has come
to crucify this body

now

take of my body
...for it is sin
drink of my blood
...for it is hellfire
253 · Jun 2018
JNHB
Beaux Jun 2018
Milk being lapped up by the tongue of a cat
Colored so black, midnight shied away
...
Structure built so firm and strict
All it did was remind which corners not to cut
...
Gone. Gone forever now.
Simply gone because it was never mine in the first place.
...
Reoccurring dreams or nightmares
Either so much more powerful than the last
For the dreams are my haunted realities
My nightmares, a sweet slumber's embrace
The sweat of a beaten boar fighting off dogs
Grasping hands for fallen lovers near pools
Could I find no better way to describe my loves?
252 · Feb 2017
Sealed Letters
Beaux Feb 2017
An unread letter lay on the floor...
Just within fingertips reach...

Words rolling off the pages
Crawling back into the pit of a mind

Apologies floating aimlessly through the verse
Landing on miniaturized egos

Goodbyes that never found ends
Hellos that never saw sunlight

Tongues dancing behind pressed teeth
Screaming into an airless void

Forced ideas birthing forced patience
Forced patience birthing forced faith

What are you waiting for?

**Just open the ******* letter, why don't you?
251 · May 2016
To your knees
Beaux May 2016
How vile it must be to be human
Praying our way around it
Even the faithless seek higher hope
When Darkness consumes the world
We laugh in hushed tones
Until the devil comes for you

Prey

*Pray it all away
Beaux Oct 2014
Listen to the silence.
She's screaming louder than you know.
Her mind fading into the void.
Listen to the silence.
She sounds like a siren's tear falling.
Her body weak and frail.
Listen to the silence.
Everything she ever wanted to say is there...
She's waiting for you to listen..
Listen to the silence.
248 · May 2016
It's so loud in here
Beaux May 2016
Can't you hear the Silence?

Breathing down the back of your neck?

It is so quietly loud.

Screaming whispers in my ear.

Can't you hear the Silence?

Shhh, listen.
For me.
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