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Azalea Banks Jul 2013
They said that she had fairy skin

And cinnamon dusted hair,

A sleepy countenance, a ragged demeanour;

They said “she’s never quite..there."

Her fingers, when I saw her
Were tangled into a wreath.

Their fragile veins seemed about to snap

But she sat so calmly in her seat.

What a waste of a fine young lady, I say,

As she muses at the sky;

An excess of poetic form

Has made her mad and shy.

And yet I harbour a fascination

For one so truly lost,

Who cannot tell real from dreams,

Who nightmares do accost.

And oh, what a beautiful sight

To see one stay so naive.

At least, I say, I’m not the kind

To pin my heart up on my sleeve.

And once again the monotony

Of another day rushes past,

And the sea inside ****** the back of my eyes, I see

An exquisite pointillism of stars.

Maybe she’s the one with the luck of the Irish,

And I’m just a manifestation of routine.

She’s awake and full of fireworks,

And I’m just half asleep.
Azalea Banks Jul 2013
Stay awake for the dawn that comes
Awake for the light at the
End of tunnel
Blink and it's gone now
Just wait and see
A cerulean
Behemoth
The sun an illusive revolver
Shooting love like a fast paced finger flung dart
Burning up the starch on your blue shirt
Searing through your heart
This is what it means to be alive
This is what it means to be alive
Azalea Banks Jun 2013
I spend my days waiting for night to come,
And nights awake waiting for day.

It’s a hopeless conundrum,

Like waiting for a flight in permanent delay.

My bedroom has become a terminal

Where tungsten lights seep through tearstains,

Where happiness is a criminal

On the run from your grenade.

I’m waiting for your satisfaction

Your smirk of approval, your disdain,

And all I get is a kiss from your shotgun

Blown off, blind-sided once again.

What’s another day to me

One step closer to being depraved

Of meaning, of purpose, of distinction;

I’m just another patient face.

I’ll wait.
Azalea Banks Jun 2013
Her abandonment was absolute,
eyes vacant and glassy,
windows to an echoing room of emptiness.
Her forehead sagged like an unrepaired ceiling with frowns and wrinkles;
she had fingers the colour of old whitewash.
Her hair sighed like old wood in a breeze,
the scars on her arms like rusted nails on ply.
Her heart creaked and ached with old timber;
an old soul, filled with sawdust and ash.

Soon enough
she would rot and collapse
to the earth,
weighed down by disrepair and neglect;
she would never find the strength
to get up
and be filled again
with children’s laughter.

Never to be called home again,
just the broken remains of a tomb,
irreparably
and completely
forgotten.
Azalea Banks Jun 2013
Shuffle
Skip
Repeat

He played his usual game of pretending to consider the palatable array of music which graced his iPod before settling for an Arctic Monkeys song, as always, just in time for the 7AM school bus that revved up the road with a satisfying crunch of gravel. The morning had a deliciously crisp quality to it, with swirls of fog swathing the trees in mild ambiguity while the sun danced a waltz in a rose and custard sky, the colour of cakes sold in Pastéis de Belém, the best patisserie in Lisbon.

He realised he hadn't eaten breakfast just as he boarded the bus.
Ah, well. **** it.

The sun skipped between the spaces in the leaves, playing hopscotch with his imagination as he dazedly looked out the window, lost in his music. Although the people on his bus were nice, he didn't exactly like them. The boys wore low pants and branded caps, the girls caked on makeup and tittered vapidly at everything the boys said. A few others quietly occupied the back seats like him, engrossed in their own world. He felt a stronger connection with these people, although he'd barely spoken to them before.

He lapsed back into his reverie while looking out the bus window, lazily tracing patterns in the cracks of the broken walls of the empty restaurants and hotels that passed by. The economic crisis had rendered hollows of places previously choked with people, now haunted with the after image of busy commerce and make-believe vignettes of scenes occurred in these skeleton remains. They were darkly beautiful, modern bones of the city that held a history too close to his own.

He forcefully snapped out of his running internal monologue just as the bus pulled up the driveway outside school. The distance of a block stood between him and school, a block fraught with danger, for he'd been robbed on a previous occasion (not that his school bag had much else besides lunch money and books). At least they hadn't nicked his iPod. He'd be helpless without it.

Music was his poison. He drank it in like the alcoholics of the night drank scotch. Every drum beat was a ricochet echo of his own heart, every guitar string picked was a twanging of his veins.

And music got him through the day. The last bell had already rung and school was over. The kids rushing out the hall blurred into an exquisite pointillism of neon clothes and benevolent cusses at each other. He picked up his bag and walked to the bus, lost in the sleep deprived haze of his thoughts.

On the ride home, he wondered where he'd be in a few years. He wondered if he'd find a place in the cascading chaos of a society ruled by the anarchy of physics, and the fear of inevitable oblivion. He wondered if he would be remembered, if his footsteps would have an echo.

But for now, he thought, his microcosmic life in Lisbon would do. There were dark alleyways to explore and museums to visit and pastries to eat. Somewhere, a waiter put a tablecloth on a dinner table with a flourish, where two lovers would later dine. Somewhere, a boy ran down some abandoned train tracks with his dog, laughing at the summer sun. Somewhere, a girl with auburn hair picked seashells from a glimmering beach as the waves crashed around her fragile legs.

Somewhere, in his heart, a flicker of nostalgia coursed through his blood.

The next song on his iPod came up.

Shuffle.
Skip.
Repeat.
Azalea Banks Jun 2013
I can taste a nightmare
At the back of my teeth
Roaring, growling, seething
Waiting for release

I can see my noises
Quiescent and opaque
Tender and bitter
Bursting with bubbling hate

I can hear my tremble
My noiseless, hurtful shaking
My hands turning to claws
My heartbeat leaping, racing

I can smell a sleepless
Night spent in limbo
Cold sweat on my fingers
Wolf eyes in my window

I can feel so broken
And yet I feel so whole
Insanity at my tail
Like sharks in a china bowl
Azalea Banks Jun 2013
There is a space in my heart that's not
A storm or a roaring sea,
Just an empty room with walls so wide
That my echoes never come back to me.
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