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868 · Nov 2012
Georgia Clay
Ayda Nov 2012
I know you too well;
you don't exist.

Only in the depths of my mind
buried deep like
Georgia clay --
found but impossible to fully dig up
with my bare hands.
Instead I claw at my brain and
scrape out as much of you as I can.

Your remains linger

unreachable, crimson fresh.
865 · Jun 2013
Wrinkle
Ayda Jun 2013
There are stories hidden within wrinkles.
Laugh lines of a captivating life,
a forehead ridden with rivers of worry.

I don't bear any branded histories
and lines for you to see.
Do not spit envy at me
as it shouts to the world how
solitary my life has been.

But I have felt.
I expect my insides are lined with
crimson cracks and crevices.
745 · Dec 2012
Consciousness
Ayda Dec 2012
My life is a latent dream
controlled by
consciously
unconscious
emotions
recognizing but not absorbing.

I mimic the complex partial seizures.

In and out.

Fifty percent of the acceptable me can’t breathe
Twenty five percent of me functions for you.

I look down at my hands
and see my fingerprints

every night.

They're different

every night.

Something so familiar yet unfamiliar
traps what happens in microscopic ridges
every time I touch you, making them
unique to my thoughts
whenever they conform to your figure.

Not confident about our ever changing existence –
a demonstration of life.
549 · Nov 2013
We to I
Ayda Nov 2013
We were once the same--flesh and heart,
Until I found myself ripping at the bark that protected you, searching,
as if trying to rid myself of my denying fingerprints,

the one thing that set us apart,

and disappear into what I admired.

I would bathe in your words.
My letters were spat at you like angular bullets that never broke your armor,
and sometimes I would miss you enough to crawl into my depths
the ominous gaping part of me,
and secure myself in horn marrow.
I would shriek your name into my coronary halls,
listening intently for echoes to hear you return
and return.

I think of you
as I trail my fingers across the parchment where your name is written,
faded on a forgotten surface that was once a tree,
that once had bark,
is gentle and
lets me keep my fingerprints
and is a reminder that you once were.
473 · Jan 2014
Falling Out
Ayda Jan 2014
I look up to the night sky and realize
there is much more black than light
and nothing blinks or twinkles
because everything that catches my eye
is already dead.
409 · Nov 2012
Untitled
Ayda Nov 2012
It started as it ended
spiraling into love yet incapable of staying in it
and now I pretend I write poetry

suddenly and easily.

— The End —