And when I say I love you
I love you
I love you,
I wonder if you can hear the echoes behind my words:
I’ll wreck you,
I’ll wreck you,
*I’ll wreck you

there are
cracks
in the pavement,
this long winding grey slab
of asphalt
and heat
and a thousand sweaty footsteps
it is far still to my house
and I wonder why
pavements cannot be shorter.

The trials and tribulations of a broken heart
Will be encountered by everyone
But Augustus Waters once said you could choose
Who would break yours
And if you were to tell me I was stupid
To listen to advice from a fictional character;
Let me tell you that I had it figured out even before
reading the book.

I do not wish to find love, or even attempt relationships
Because I know myself best
And myself is a cruel person.
I do not wish ill upon another
In the form of my presence in their life.
And I do not wish to be hurt by them as well
Because as cruel as I am , I am a passionate, sensitive person.
I cry over losing fictional characters;
I do not wish to know how it is like to cry over people.
At the very least, I could relive my times with my fictional characters;
I could open page one again, or being the first episode all over.
But, I cannot relive my times and do as such with real, tangible people,
And I do not choose to get hurt by them.
And that is why
I am not brave.