In a room sheltered by the passing of the seasons,
Trapped within the tempest of my consciousness,
A forbidden unravels between the two of us,
Like a wistful fragrance, losing itself in the winds.

You asked me to draw my reserved strength,
You sparked my dead empathy.
You spoke to my heart and asked it never to bleed and cry.
And then you left me by myself, alone in the face of my worst enemy, myself.

Today, as I sit under a naked full moon,
As its moonbeams pierce my solitary heart,
With the breeze running over my wounds,
My heart yearns to know where you are.

In order to fend those I loved,
I corrupted myself to become the one thing I hated,
The prey became the predator, lifted his sword,
Yet who can I embrace with my sword raised?

With your sweet words,
With the promise of your mischevious smile,
You lowered my arms.
You brought me back, but you left me alone.

I rest my psyche against the darkness that threatens to overcome my soul,
The fires you lit are long gone.
Sometimes, I think you were a cruel joke,
A jape by fate, to harden my glass heart.

Now, my raised sword serves no good,
A man wielding a sword, yet yielding his will to live,
Protects no one, he only kills.
All I want now is to rest in the embrace of cold death.

I do not know what I want anymore,
Perhaps you left me soul dead.
Nevertheless, i wish to forget,
I wish for your traces on my soul to be erased.
In light of sorrow, the moments of joy you left,
Pierce me harsher than barbed arrows.

Tell me.
How do I erase you from my soul?

I am sinking,
Into an obsidian pool,
Buried somewhere deep in the crevices of my mind.
Or is t something that transcends my identity,
A sliver of an entity that is so refined,
That the pool in my dreams,
Is a pale reflection of what it truly is.
As I sink into the dark waters,
The stars that shine above fade away,
As the darkness claims what should never have been,
The joyous moments we shared deluged.
I watch, impassive.
The pool of oblivion cleanses me of the taint,
That emotion smothers on all those who fall prey to it.
In the backdrop, a desolate aria snakes its way,
A song without words, lust and longing lent expression,
As it plays, I can see you, fade away,
The water purges your traces away from my soul,
And all I may do is watch you go away,
Perhaps, this is for the best.
Mortal men, caged by the demons of their past,
Should not wander to close, to divine beings like you,
Lest, like me, they burn and wither away,
In the fiery embrace of unrequited love.
For tonight however,
The pool shall remake me again.

Deicide,
The death of an entity
To the tick of a broken clock.
Solitary, in the backdrop,
A medley sounds,
Woven of solitary despair and chaos,
A song without words,
Drenched in emotions.
How am I supposed to keep up
With the pace of this feral world,
When my crutches, my love for you,
Is long gone.
Deicide,
The death of an aspect,
Of a forgotten dream.
Perhaps, this is for the best.
Our fate was merely to brush past each other,
And continue.
You, towards your ascent,
But me, my descent beckons.

At times I confess,
The follies that are part of me,
The bane of being human,
Force me to find recluse in solitude,
Away from the squabbles of mortal men,
Who fight for things immaterial,
Spurning things that they should endevour to have.
Alas, it shames me not,
That solitude at times,
Rejuvenates some hidden part of myself,
A resevoir refilled, replenished.
I spend my time alone,
Listening to the solitary wind,
Or to the beats of some bard’s song,
Uncovering meaning in both.
But I must admit there are times,
When I watch lovers entwined in a casual embrace,
Or a child’s loving gaze at his parent,
And realization strikes me.
Although I like being alone at times,
The wine of loneliness bitters my withered soul.

I stand alone under a full moon,
Trapped by the intoxicating desolation of the empty night.
I watched stars fade out and die,
Disappear into the void, consumed,
By suffering and sadness, woe and misery.
I opened my arms, let the shadows eat out my heart,
Let the oblivion fill my soul, with each breath I took.
My eyes, alas, could not shed a single tear,
They had burned out.
Yet the air around me shimmered with a haze,
A haze of pain, of silent screams and horror unexpressed.

I touch the warm embrace of fire,
Let the flames touch my defiled skin,
I watch in awe as the fire accepts what the world so desperately rejects,
Let the dancing fingers envelop my flesh,
I watch as I die,
Rotting inside and out,
I ride the Darkness,
I feast on solitude,
I thrive on the wine of loneliness.
Is it only pain that keeps me alive?

Why couldn’t you have left me,
Why did you have to interfere?
You could have let me stand underneath the full moon,
Watched me howl and drown myself in despair,
Let me unravel and fade away,
Slowly into the darkness of the night.

Why did you have to step in,
And turn around my life?
The illusion of a better tomorrow,
Is a trap that you lured me in.
The bitter poison of an emotion best caged,
Is the one that you exposed me to.

Yet even now,
As I learn to live as a shade again,
As I howl at the full moon,
I realize these are bitter rants,
On a withered soul.
A warrior is most vulnerable when he is injured,
And the one who saves his life,
He is indebted to that one.
He pledges not only his sword,
But also his soul.
Yet the saviour,
How is it any different for her?
Her task is to save, not to nurture.

Standing under the weeping sky,
Molested by the blowing breeze.
How much time must pass before the rain,
Freezes the tears flowing down my cheeks?

Each time I draw breath,
The shattered glass pierces my lungs.
This intriguing world,
Grows ever more distant

I can never say good bye to you.
Yet you never gave me the choice to.
Cut me off and erased me.
I cling on now painfully.

How much must I scream,
For my cries to pierce,
The veil of your indifferent silence?
These cries have no aim or hope.

A glimpse.
An exquisite glance at your beautiful smile.
Why won't you grace me with the divine melody,
Of your voice?

Back then I remember,
The nights I spent in the comfort of your company,
Till you decided to leave me alone,
What did I do so terribly wrong?

You made me forget,
Forget the demons I once was.
Holding you in my arms,
What will happen to me if I forget you?
Specks of stardust,
The universe expressing itself.
How is it that we fit so close,
Snuggling into each others arms?

The stars, they might be hiding from us tonight,
But I know they're watching us.
Tiny flickers of hope and joy,
The lights we are looking for in our lives.

Happiness always comes with a price.
Joy cannot be understood without sorrow.
Standing next to you seemed so natural to me,
That I can't believe that you're gone.

I have wept only as many tears as many could flood my eyes,
After that I waited for the scarlet sunrise.
Something that will continue forever from now on,
A world without you, ashen, dull and grey.

Wounds which can never be healed,
Left upon bruised skin.
Sometimes the pain is renewed when,
I hear your melodious laugh.

Happiness can only be realized when,
It ceases to exist forevermore.
I have only one wish,
To see you once again like before.

The city of my heart, one which had closed its doors long ago.
Stands with shattered ruins cloaked in the miasma of my dread.
The forges which had gone out long ago,
Have rekindled flames burning bright.
Resurrected hope flutters against the bleak backdrop,
Its wings burning bright against the smoke.

I look at you and smile.
You look at me and gaze into my soul.
Healing it.
I want to ask you to stop,
If you look into the abyss,
The abyss shall look into you.
But my protests are silenced,
Rendered mute by the touch of your lips.
You smirk, knowing the power you hold over your knave.

Slowly, your taste sets my senses on fire,
A fire which is feral.
For a brief moment I am whole again,
Yet we must part to take a breath.
You smile and hold me in your embrace,
All shall be well, you whisper in my ear.

A thousands paths lay untrodden,
What does the never ending future hold?
All I want is that we continue our journey,
Our journey towards that eternal dream.
And never truly let go.

Maybe if the Gods grace me their favor,
Maybe we'll slip into the darkness together.
On the same breath we'll leave our mortal shells.
To be one forever more.

You've opened a door in my heart,
One I didn't know was there.
I'm here on the edge again,
Don't let me go.
In the warmth of your embrace,
I know I'm finally home.

A low grumbling noise,
Awakens the poor child,
Afraid he clutches his rags,
Alone he whimpers softly,
Trying not to wake up his dad.
Abu wasn't nice, he smelled,
And Ammi called him d-r-u-n-k.
The growling grew near,
It haunted him every night.
It kept a distance,
Yet still made him shiver from fright.
Two bright suns, the eyes of a demon,
Race past him, parting the puddles,
S-p-l-a-s-h
No longer dry, he stares blankly into the dark,
Sobs and crawls back under the plastic sheet,
Crawls back into his home.
Next to his house,
Is a glitzy place.
He has seen the Gods visit the place.
Not the ones Ammi took him to meet,
But the ones who had bones and flesh.
At times they threw nibbled ambrosia at him,
He was too hungry to comprehend the word leftovers.
Yet on his final night there was no food,
There was no omen.
No comet marked the death of those forsaken by their stars.
Two eyes blinded him,
The rest broke his petite form.
A God steps out, leans over his broken form, spits,
And cleans the filth, his blood off the hood.
An elder man looms over his broken form,
His eyes displaying a nonchalant sadness.
The God turns to his slave,
"Bansilal, you were driving the car."
And then to perhaps, himself,
"****** beggars, don't they have anyplace else to live?"

Tears streaked down his cheeks,
Why didn't they realize it hurt.
It started with a single word.
"Useless" and they killed him.

Days turned into months.
Yet his tormentors didn't let him go.
Angry, bitter, afraid and left alone,
Like arrows, the words began to pierce his soul.

Weak. Stupid. Idiot. ****.
The voices in his head,
Were no longer his friends.
Useless filth why not end it?

Left alone, with those brutal voices.
With those horrible fears,
Alone with those terrible words,
He took to the blade.

He watched the blood leave his veins,
His skin grow cold and pale.
USELESS. USELESS. USELESS.
Carved forever on his skin.

No goodbyes, no more horror.
After having written down,
All the secrets he could spill,
Before dosing on a dozen sleeping pills.

I'll tell you a story instead.
Mind you, it's a short story and gets horribly dull at times.
It's about a boy. His name is irrelevant, because his true name was dreary, dull and quire big. So more often than he made friends, he assumed names. Slowly,  burdened by the brunt of all that he was, he lost sense of who he truly was.
And then suddenly, the darkness grew tangible, swallowing him, churning everything positive into nothingness, extinguishing all the specks of light and hope he clung to, replacing it, replacing him with an abyss.
And then he was truly no longer the boy he was. To be honest, he wasn't even human anymore. Self pity stripped him of his conscience and his rage defiled his humanity. He was no more than a woven shadow, a psyche whose malicious intent was so honed that his character became a sharp blade of cold Stygian iron, forged to inflict misery.
And one night, the boy who was slumbering in the depths of the abyss woke up, to find himself alone on a hill of fresh corpses.
No more he swore.
In the name of those who suffered for the sins their race had committed, he swore that he'd change, he'd be the stranger who never stayed, an intercession in times of crisis, he'd become the boy who ran to save the lives he had no connection to.
But unfortunately, the dead told tales and the blood on his hands would never disappear. Even though he was there for people, few were there for him. And every time he lowered his defenses and allowed himself the luxury of a liaison, the world would cruelly remind him that he was merely to be tolerated. Cast out of the lives of the people he once thought he could love, he kept on running away. Imposing a self exile, he lost things that he could not even comprehend. And he's still running. Because humanity always tries to make good of its promises. Running and hoping that someday, he'd become a proper story.

The color of the night sky,
Peppered with the light of the stars,
The soft moonlight falling on me,
Is it trying to teach me the hue of sorrow?

I can see the confusion in your eyes,
You don't understand why I turn away,
Yet never seem to leave.
I wish I could tell you everything.

From the distance I have imposed,
I can see your unwiped tears.
Glittering, your eyes are so beautiful.
The words that I can't hold on to are escaping my soul.

If the world was to end,
To be consumed by fire and brimstone,
Surely in that moment of farewell you'd understand.
That without knowing your answer, my solitary heart exiled itself.

The world is too busy with itself,
The sound of sorrow can reach no one's ears.
Even then, I have a strong resolve.
On a night when my wishes are to be discarded,

I will hold my ground.
Merging with the shadows,
Becoming one with my sword,
I will protect you forever by your side.

Yet till I hold the sword,
I dare not embrace you.
Lest I hurt you, my love.
Is this the cursed existence of a shadow?

Relying on the night sky,
The river of words that bleeds out of my heart,
Shimmers in the distant horizon,
Like a thousand shattered blades.

In my life as a whole, what kind of person do you see me as?
Tonight, I merely want to hold your hand,
Even if just for this moment, I want to be in your future.

Lately I've been slipping away,
Sinking into my own darkness.
Let somehow, in those barren nights,
Your smile lit up my days.

These repeating days,
Intensify my desire for you.
Oh you do not realize what I would give,
To merely gaze at your smiles.

Yet this desire is new.
I do not lust for the taste of your lips.
The sacrilegious thought horrifies me.
All that I want is happiness for you,

With or without me.

In fact, I don't think I can ever try to claim you,
For all my bravery, seeking you out scares me the most.
Better to love you from afar,
Than to shatter my heart.

A simple reply, an answer weaved of two words,
Would scatter my essence.
I'm scared to hear you respond that way
I can't hold my ­balance, crumbling in this dilemma

In my life as a whole, what kind of person do you see me as?
Tonight, I merely want to hold your hand,
Even if just for this moment, I want to be in your future.

During the dark hours of cold night,
During the bright hours of unforgiving light,
I turn in sleep, restless and unbound to peace,
Edging away from a dream,
As Ships edge away from the safety of land into stormy seas.
And then it hits me, the mace of my memories,
The memory spike ravages, savages,
Pierces deep, deep down.
Crushes tears, and the crimson blood of my soul,
Is defiled by the salt of her tears.

Yet not today.
Today passion reigns deep in my marrow,
The f lames chastising all pain.
The heavenly fire seeps throughout each and every vein,
With each beat, my heart is once again ablaze.
It is feral and wild, the urge to create,
Which started even before the creation of time.

It rules my daily movements,
It dictates the terms.
Of my descent, of my descent into hell.
I am a mundane guy for this term I serve on earth,
A sucker for sunsets and sunrises, full moons, azure lakes, pretty beings of the fair *** and a lot many simple things.
If only anyone knew how much I love,
Cotton candy, pretty eyes, doughnuts and symmetry.

It seems for this tenure on earth,
Cupid is my fabled foe.
He sets me up for failure,
Polishes the mace of memories,
Again and again.
But it is like Krishna said.
Times of sorrow are forgotten in times of greater sorrow or joy.
I always get lost in fiery sensuous moments,  
I taste raw-things making it harder not to succumb to lustful-whims.
I relish thoughts about carnal sin, dream about intimacy between intertwined-bodies,
Yet I am composed.
I can hide those intimate thoughts,
And smile a little smile which makes me die a little on the inside.
I dare not get too close.
For it is like Dante said.
There is no greater sorrow
Than to recall a happy time
When miserable.

Can you whistle to the winds for me?
Can you caress the dark recesses of the night as you would caress me?
Can you whisper to the sky, whisper what is to conspire?
Do this for me, while i wait for them to carry it on to me...
I pray to whatever Gods there may be,
to unite the two of us again.
Perhaps they'll heed my prayer,
Perhaps they'll heed your smile?
So, can you sing to the winds for me?
Can you caress the dark recesses of the night as you would caress me?
Can you whisper to the sky, whisper what is to conspire, between you and me?
Do this for me, while i wait for them to carry it on to me...
For now that you have caught my heart,
It can only pray for you.
You, this word holds new meaning for me,
for it sort of defines you.
Words, my only allies till now,
Suddenly betray me in front of you.
For it is in your absence that I remember how to breathe,
But it is in your absence that each breath turns painful.
This maybe too much to ask of you, yet,
Can you whistle to the winds for me?
Can you caress the dark recesses of the night as you would caress me?
Can you whisper to the sky, whisper what is to conspire?
Do this for me, while i wait for them to carry it on to me...

'Are you okay now?'
Oh, darling, if only you knew,
Only if you could see the light, I see in you with my eyes,
If only you could hear the music that weaves itself,
When you open your lovely mouth.
(But if anything,
I am adept at cowardly self restraint,
Whitled from rotting words and empty dreams,
Chipped and jagged, broken shards.
Yet your eyes, those deep wells,
Brimming with happiness,
With sorrow stifled within smiles,
If only you knew,
If only you could see.
I'm burning up, my defenses breaking,
With every moment the two of us share.
This provokes me, this change of season in the depths of my mind,
Replacing feral winter with lovely spring,
Peace of mind. My satisfaction,
Albeit a solitary one has been ravaged apart.
It tasted pungent, sweet, and
Maddeningly powerful,
Yet the smell of your words is far intoxicating,
Letting loose all my inhibitions.
If only you could see what you meant to me,
Would you be as scared as I am now?)
Shaking my head, dispelling this hasty afterthought,
Of course I am, I reply, With you here, what else could I be?
And you cover it with an immaculate laugh, chiding me on my flirtatiousness,
If only you could see, what you meant to me.

There are some days I stand in the sunlight, bathing and basking in The light,
There are some days I remember the songs which played in my childhood,
There are some nights I read all that I have ever wrote.
And then I write again.
I bleed out my soul,
Convert our essence into words.
When I finish, I stand up and say,
**** it all and set our love on fire.
With the burning paper, I feel my heart burn as well.
I stare into the darkness, waiting for it to swallow me whole.
And you have every right to be scared
Cause some nights when I kiss you it's all lust,
When I touch you there is no love.
I ask you to lock me up,
Chain me down,
Darling if you love me, why do you let me hurt you so?
Oh my god have I made you blind?
Can you not see your tears?
Oh my god have I made you deaf
Can you not hear the fanfare as I cut my wrists?
Trumpets blowing as I bleed.
There are some nights we dance,
A dance of pain.
Oh my god save me,
Save us,
Save her? From me at least?
I dare not look inward for the solution.
Oh my God help me?

I'm so tired of this empty feeling
I'm so tired of being alone
I lay here staring at the ceiling
Waiting by the phone

I jump when the phone rings
It brings a smile to my face
When she hangs up my heart stings
And I sink back into my lonely place

I wish and I dream
That we'll be together soon
I can't wait until we can look up hand in hand
At the stars and at the moon

I yearn for her kisses
Her touch - Her embrace
I can't wait for the days
When I get to see her face

I'm flooded with thoughts of her
In my heart, soul, and mind
I imagine her touch
So gentle and kind

I try not to weep
I hope she doesn't hear my cries
But I can't stop the tears
Falling from my eyes

I cry a thousand tears
And think - how much more can I take?
But in my heart I know I'd wait a thousand years
All for love's sake
The horrid emotion floods my insides,
The nihilistic warrior I was exists no more
Why can she fix my pains with just a smile?

I tremble, i quake
I lose control to my undying soul.
She holds over me power unknown
So in the nights I try to cry,

For I want these emotions gone.

I am falling.
I am ascending.
I have felt heaven's rage.
I feel Hell's grace.
A seraph stripped of his wings, of his blades.
A child of Lilith, stripped of her vile blood.
I am falling.
I am surfacing.
There is something tyrannical about order,
There is something alluring about chaos.
I am Atlas Rover, the fallen one. History shall no longer remember my name.
I am Kyuubus Insignia, the ascended one. The fires of hell burn out my name.
We are different, yet closely bound.
For chaos and order, good and bad are so intricately mixed.
Uniting us is a single vessel of Adam's kin.
Fragile flesh, empty soul.
Dividing us is our essence.
One strives to tear down order,
Employing the weapons of hell.
One strives to rejoice in honor,
Albeit in a heavenly grace.

When angels fall, destiny propels them into being devils,
Milton said that it is better to rule in hell than to serve in heaven,
Yet he was blind.
I am Atlas Rover, cast out of heaven's grace.
Brandishing a flaming sword of words and wings of empathy.
Yet I am Kyuubus Insignia, born of diabolical innocence.
We are two sides of the same coin,
Yet one side must tip over for the other's sake.

Another day lived drop by drop,
I cannot turn to God, how can I stop?
Friends family beg alike,
Yet nothing compares to those golden drops.
Golden amber, bliss frozen into drops.
Is this how a mortal feels,
Having drunk ichor?
By the bottle there is no shame, only pain.
I drink a lot not sure if that's new,
These few moments of regret with myself,
Grace me till I reach the shelf.
But when the bottle is open, there is nothing more.
Sorrow makes me grip the bottle tight,
Despair won't leave me till midnight.
Delirium patiently waits,
As I drown in the amber fluid.
All thoughts of abstinence are crude,
I no longer have any pride.
All this regret is from a former me,
One I can no longer be.
Revelation and realization overcome me like a high tide,
Sorrow drowns me in its folds.
I guess there is no other way yet,
So I drink till I choke.
Silent stares from my friends,
Cut the silence like broken glass.
The silent sobs of my mother,
Sound so distant. Dampened by the liquor.
I despise what I have become,
I have lost my own self.
Maybe one day I'll be back,
Till then I'll drown and hate.

Oh, How exquisite it was.
The scent and sight of freshly spilled blood.
The intricate texture of the ruby rain,
Spilling a and snaking down my skin.
Like precious liquid gems.
Oh, how glorious slaughter is.
How full of life it left me.
Cloaked in Death,
With the throbs of my heart,
Far lively compared to that of the corpse.
Oh how my laughs punctuated the air.
How I rebelled in the glory of my deed.
I was made in the image of god,
And now I understood the power of death.
This is not insanity, it is purer than that.
It is not rage, it is wilder than that.
It was never about avarice or fear as well.
It was feral blood lust, the legacy of my ancestors.
As I prey on my second victim, she raises the cross.
Sigh, I wonder, as I watch her wilt away.
Why does man consider all that is above it out of God's grace?
In the field of life, one's angel is the other's devil.
And so it has been unleashed.
Upon the earth, the scrounge of heaven and hell.
Man unrestrained and warped into its vile self.

Shattered glass, salt sprinkled sand.
Ruins. That is all that remains.
Nothing but bleak sorrow left to inspire.
Nothing but music to express.
Black and white shades adorn a piano untouched by the flames.
Yet how does it manage to capture so many hues?
My fingers rise against their own will,
I might be the pianist, but this is the melody my heart sings.
As soon as the first tune hits the bleak backdrop,
I realize how different it is from anything I have ever heard,
Anything I have ever created.
It inspires life, it inspires growth. The world starts to heal itself with these tunes.
It begins simply, this cacophony my heart is creating.
But with an arresting phrase. So simple, that it is as eloquent as her voice.
She speaks beckoning gently,
As the music unwinds, rising and tensing.
It spirals upwards, the tension growing with each repeat of the phrasing,
Yet at the same time, the music is more expressive.
It is free, wild and feral.
It is me.
The notes which flood out of the piano are surely more than a mundane one can hope to play,
Yet this is anything but mundane.
It is a piano made of dreams and hopes.
It is an orchestra.
The music. Oh the music.
More seductive than poetry,
Far more blinding than light,
Fare more comforting than the darkness.
It is moonlight cast into tunes.
Beautifully contradictory,
Extraordinarily breathtaking.
It seemed impossible to breathe,
Yet that was all I could do.
The music seemed to waft into something tangible.
It demanded a palpable presence.
And like something out of a myth,
She stands over the ruins that she has created.
And the dam bursts. The music changes.
It becomes a hurting tune,
One which is resigned.
A cry of heartache which resounds over my entire dreamscape.
How can pain be so beautiful?
"Why?" Her image asks of me.
"Why can't you end this?"
And I pause.
How can i remove her from myself?
The one who shines with the brilliance of a thousand suns,
Whose smile dims the entire universe.
Her voice like quicksilver,
Her lush curls.
Eyes like pools, lined with kohl.
I would pay any price but these memories to forget about her.
But sadly, my dream self asks me a question and I must oblige.
Maybe she'll know why as well,
For all dreams come from one.
"Do we not dream of dreams?
How can erase my most beautiful dream?
The one which changed me the most?
Stripped me of my armor and left me vulnerable and broken?
Do we not dance on the notes of lost memories?
I am adrift on the sea of trials and tribulations,
Waiting for my ships to take me home.
But till then, till when I reach the promised land,
Your voice shall call out to me,
More treacherous than the sea itself."

Music is all powerful, music is pure expression.
It is more powerful than the seraphic runes which cannot be spoken.
Dare I translate my memories into melodies and those into words?
I go on, for I have lost whatever I had to lose.
Doleful melodies, painful memories.
The slight echo of music, terribly beautiful.
Alone, in the chamber of the illusions my mind carved,
I strum a grand piano.
An orchestra plays to my descent.
Hear the trumpets blow, the cellos play.
A soft tune wafts from the keys, how can it be so full of longing and rage?
These keys feel alien to my fingers, the scene feels on fire.
Smoke fills my lungs as I mourn your loss.
A crescendo.
An echo of paradise lost forever, barred.
This music is painful, yet I dare not stop.
Resonating in the glass corridors of the palace I made as ode to you,
All those moments of joy and tranquility burn as I play.
Each piece of the beautiful memories I forged with you, break away and sink into my psyche.
Yet the music dare not stop.
Each stroke. Each note.
Sings of loss, lament and woe.
But somewhere there is hope.
Violins now. Repeating what my heart feels.
'This palace cannot hold this strain,
The power of this music is great.
It weaves its way into the essence of all I know.
Corrupting all things joyous,
Tainting the pure white snow with bleak sorrow.
Each note I play, hurts my soul.
Each symphony is a painful reminder of my loss.
But it is over now, all is lost.
All songs end, mine is over now.
Farewell to you, may the broken palace of my dreams be a fitting tribute.

O liquid temptress of my dark dreams,
Your ****** expanse calls me
And I would sail ever on,
Were it not for the elven maid,
Who calls me, calls me

She binds my heart with a lily white tie,
Never to be broken, save by my torment
Ever to be torn between the treesand waves.
And I travel for ever, for ever,
To reach the elven maid's heart which lies,
Beyond the liquid temptress' grasp.

The elven maid in beauty basks,
Her eyes as auburn as hallow woods.
Her hair as lush as the foamy tide,
With ruby lips and honeyed words,
She calls me, calls me.

She breaks all enchantments on me,
And calls me to the elven land.
Her voice awakens the fallow lands,
And fills my heart with unearthly joy

O liquid temptress of my dark dreams,
Your ****** expanse calls me
And I would sail ever on,
Were it not for the elven maid,
Who calls me, calls me

'Are you okay now?'
Oh, darling, if only you knew,
Only if you could see the light, I see in you with my eyes,
If only you could hear the music that weaves itself,
When you open your lovely mouth.
(But if anything,
I am adept at cowardly self restraint,
Whitled from rotting words and empty dreams,
Chipped and jagged, broken shards.
Yet your eyes, those deep wells,
Brimming with happiness,
With sorrow stifled within smiles,
If only you knew,
If only you could see.
I'm burning up, my defenses breaking,
With every moment the two of us share.
This provokes me, this change of season in the depths of my mind,
Replacing feral winter with lovely spring,
Peace of mind. My satisfaction,
Albeit a solitary one has been ravaged apart.
It tasted pungent, sweet, and
Maddeningly powerful,
Yet the smell of your words is far intoxicating,
Letting loose all my inhibitions.
If only you could see what you meant to me,
Would you be as scared as I am now?)
Shaking my head, dispelling this hasty afterthought,
Of course I am, I reply, With you here, what else could I be?
And you cover it with an immaculate laugh, chiding me on my flirtatiousness,
If only you could see, what you meant to me.

I am the night sky embodied on this bleeding earth,
I am the essence of dreams made human,
I am the oncoming darkness,
The Bridger of the storms.
Yet tonight, in the soft embrace of your pale arms,
Caught in the web of my love for you,
I am woefully mortal and vulnerable.
A soft moon shines upon the two of us,
You the light of the day,
One whose smile lights up the sun,
And I. I am not unknown to mankind,
Yet we are strangers.
I am cursed to walk the dreams of all but yours.
And so, I am all the sins, hopes, dreams and agonies of the countless that I have come across in my forbidden travels,
Yet none. None as beautiful as the one I behold tonight,
None as radiant.
The soft glow of your pale skin,
Manages to slowly tame the raging beast which is my heart,
Stop cries experience.
Detest says the mind
You shall be lost again says my heart
Yet if that is the price for this joy,
Why not?
And so it begins.
Raw lust mixed with passion and love,
Twisting, turning, gyrating,
The limits of your consciousness melding as one,
With the holy unison of our flesh,
This fleeting moment.
I wish and hope that I can freeze this with me forever,
Yet this forever, this eternity of mine is fleeting.
Already as the sun rises,
My essence fades,
Away from thee my love.
Yet when you feel alone,
Look into the depths of your shadows. I shall be there for you,
A woeful lament of love and desire

There is hope make the call
A single sign reads
The cold metal touches my soul through the soles of my shoes
The breeze freezes my very breaths
How can one sign convince me of hope,
When thousands in my life speak otherwise?
One step. One step for nature to finish the tragedy it started.
One step and the fall would not **** me
The abrupt stop would. But while I would fall,
I would be invincible, unstoppable
I would be flying.
And then it would end.
My life.
More than a thousand dreams hopes views
Extinguished
Lost in the sea of faces which would claim my memory
As I stand on the rim
The desire to jump strengthens.
My power to resist grows.
Sigh.
Not today.
For today, I make the call.
A single path awaits me now,
Now that I discarded another.
I'll carry on, the prodigal son,
And just hope that there will be peace when I'm finally done.
So. I'll make the call.

A sparkling key shimmers in the haze beyond my nightmares,
A key to life made of light sets off a conquest,
Mirroring it is the key of the dark,
Which allows my red eyes of illusion,
to haunt someones death or life.
I have been looking for an answer,
Some truth that determines my paths, my ways,
While wandering about aimlessly,
I can sense the trillion elements
Getting entangled within my thoughts.
This silver city of my thoughts,
In in a chaotic state of order,
Spiritual pain breaches its walls,
Guilt and sorrow rain down, corroding the structures I so proudly built.
Where would I be, I wonder,
When this city finally falls?
Unknown, misunderstood,
Book of life, to which I hold the key,
What is the price of a soap bubble?
What is the cost of the first rain drop on the barren earth?
What is the joy in a newborn's smile?
Key to life,
These hands which are weapons which wield weapons,
Can you transmit my sorrow beyond the walls of my heart?
Unknown to life, ignorant of death,
Would you delude me with hope?
And then there is you.
With what reason do you smile,
with such gentle eyes,
Drawing me closer in the web of your love?
I think I can now unlock the door which was always locked.
Because you are the spirit I need,
The demon of pain encased within the angel of love,
You can provide my soul the element of pain and warmth,
Listen to my heart, o Goddess,
Transmutate what I was.
The hand of the Goddess echoes out,
Your love changing my past, present and future,
The burden of my sins replaced with joy,
Which key do I deserve to hold now,
Now that the heartbeat of destinies untold, beat within your womb.
The key to both life and death is slowly being born,
Growing its wings in the loving glow of your flesh.
Developing, as our bond reaches its peaks.
Key to life, I thank thee for this,
For invoking desire and passion in me/
Light and darkness consort eternally,
Angels flirting with demons,
The keys to both life and death hide now in the complex codes,
In the memory of DNA, surpassing time.
It is there sons of Adam and Eve, where my truth lies.

The fairy tale I believed in had died,
I cannot rejoice, caged by society and sorrow,
The foggy night, shall you let the moonlight touch me?
Look at me.
Look into my eyes.
Behind these iron bars,
I was born, a child of failed union,
A child of malice and rage,
Pray to whatever God you may,
I shall bring justice
Under the tutelage of the faceless god.
I shall destroy all that deserve death,
Before they destroy all those who deserve life.
I shall bear the burden of sin,
So promise me, shall you live?
Promise me this, and I will gladly live with this nameless monster of mine.
My ears ring with the voices of the ******,
Calling out to me to end their lives.
I cannot remember the melody of that day,
When we danced together in sunlit day,
Now the rain shall never cease to fall.
I cannot see anything beyond my perverted notions anymore.
Let the sky rain down upon me black acid rain,
Let the air be filled with miasma thick.
I am a being of rage and hate,
Of fear and avarice,
With the blades with which I killed,
The God of my innocence,
Today I shall punish all those who are guilty.
Accepting the unerasable scars on my body,
Let us ravage the false gods of this world, O nameless monster of mine.
Ah.
This skill, these prayers.
I am the God of unrelenting justice and damnation.

Abraham took Isaac's hand and led him to the lonesome hill.
The hill which stood solemn and ominously, with vultures and coyotes keeping guard,
While his daughter hid and watched,
She dare not breathe, she was so still.
Just as an angel cried for the slaughter,
Abraham's daughter raised her voice,
"How can thee father of mine, spill thy blood?
Doth thee forget the fate of Cain?
Why this blind faith in an absent God?"
The angel hearing this, unfurled his wings, and took out his angel blade,
And asked her what her name was,
She said unfazed, "I have none."
Then he asked, "How can this be?
For you are thy name, just as the Lord is who he is,
It is the fate of all mankind to be limited by the confines of their names"
"My father never gave me one."
In divine rage, the angel cried,
"Insolence, Heresy, Sin. Today Abraham the heavenly host leaves thee,
Lest thy daughter mend her fault,
Both thee and thy son shall fall"
Seeing all mankind raised for slaughter,
The daughter stole the angel's blade,
"If that is what thee wants,
I shall erase myself from time itself,
Yet today paradise is lost,
Remember carefully the words of the Daughter of Eve"
And so history forgets her name,
Much as sense wins over faith.
Is that what you planned,
O God of Rage, ruling over a land of hate?

I stand at crossroads, I am sure of that.
Surrounds me a lush green meadow, perhaps The Garden Of Eden on a better day,
But for today, a grey sky looms over me, the clouds ashen and grey.
Rain falls mercilessly, trampling the land, attempting to deluge all in its way.
I remember this land. It was once my realm, my universe.
But no more, it is now a savage and broken world,
one which tries to grab onto my essence in an attempt to recover.
But I know that this realm, the reflection of my heart, is beyond all help.
I wonder, though I know the answer, who is responsible?
And then I see you. Nervously, I dare not meet your eyes; dare not call out to you,
Lest you disappear, fading away again.
How is this possible? I wonder, gazing at you by the corner of my eye.
How can it be that the Prince of stories, the master of dreams, fall so low?
How can a mortal, no matter how divine, ensnare the heart of an evil eternal?
I suspect Desire’s sweet hand, perhaps the arrows of Cupid, but I let it pass.
Never before have I felt such a sweet pain, such a pleasing torment.
You, who draws me close, like a siren’s call, are the one from whom I must run away.
For every second with you is heaven, a visit to Delirium’s realm,
but sadly, each moment with you, makes me mortal as well.
Each second away from you, I grow stronger, yet a part of me wonders.
What joy does power hold for me, which I cannot find in your sweet voice?
What happiness would I find even in eternity, which I cannot share with your twinkling amber eyes?
But I know the laws, the ancient treaties.
No matter how strong my feelings, they should never reach you.
I am the lord of dreams, and I know I never appear in yours.
Sadly, our worlds do not meet. Even if they did,
I am but a trespasser.
So as I watch my realm dissolve, as I see it fade into yours,
I swear on the First Circle, the sphere of dreams, on the hanging Sword and Shield,
That I shall always be here for you.
Like following a shining thread time flows on its course.
Your smile holds the warmth which melts my heart.
Like a faint dream, beautiful in its wake, I shall always treasure it.
Though our paths will not merge, our destinies are intertwined.
I can only walk through your time, being a protective shadow,
Even if fate, blowing blindly, estranges us, I shall still be there for you.
Like the earth yearning for the sky, I yearn for you, realizing that we must never meet.
While I wander, like an aimless sparkle, a fleeting illusion,
Even if the darkness takes hold of the light, and my past catches up with me.
I will be there for you, a dream lord captive to you.

The cities of man are filled with senselessly cruel and harsh words,
Never more, that voice which was hushed and washed away,
Transgressed and mutiliated, given no rights of its own.
A brutality of the past taking form in the pages of modern day.
The streets were grounds for carnage and blood,
Unheld rage and lust were predator,
Never more, that voice was hushed and washed away,
In memory of your spirit, we take this pledge.
It's time to say goodbye to this casual everyday life,
Our days of sunshine were lost in the wake of dark brutality.
This drizzling fog hides the sun and steals the light.
I was lost, with nothing left to believe in, but.
In the wake of darkness, I cannot forsake the light.
Never more, no matter how dark the days get,
I know the ones who keep the light alive are not alone.
I'll find it, the most precious thing I lost.
Never more, it's as if I can hear your voice - it's guiding me.
Its forcing me to forsake the monster I once was.
Yet how can I forgot all the blood I bathed in?
The burden of my sins is greater than I could have borne alone.
I used to believe in foolish ideals when I was young,
but before I knew it I'd forgotten those most important words.
I searched and sought all through this restless world,
and at last I found them in the depths of my heart.
If I keep riding the tides of my life and time,
I feel like we shall never meet again.
Although I assure you, even amid all the confusion, if you'll call out to me, I'll pay you heed,
I'll believe in your smile and the bonds between us. Never more, no matter how far, your heart will reach me.
These travels of mine, their only destination may be endless sleep.
Grant me this wish, I ask you, grant me a corner in your memory,
I'll be there. I'll believe in you and start walking.
Toward the beat of your heart, and the warm glow of your smile.
I shall never forget the stain of our days together.
Never more; no matter how dark it gets, I know I'm not alone.
I'll find it, the most precious thing I lost.
Never more, it's as if I can hear your voice - it's guiding me.
Even now I still remember
The night when I touched you, still
A beautiful memory
I'll always remember

I am the child of faceless night,
Born of a union of mere flesh.
I am the bane of garish light,
Born to voice a thousand cries.

As the tyrannical sun sets,
As the benevolent darkness takes over,
I lend my ears to pleas of the mute,
My footsteps swift and my movements light.

Cloaked by deception, myth and legend,
I am the faceless God of Death.
Hidden by lies, tales and fables,
I am the bearer of infinite names.

In times of Eclipse, when order falls,
When the avarice of a few prey on other lives,
When Justice, the blind, mute and dumb wretch turns away it eyes,
I don my mask, the son of chaos and fear.

Although bards pen my tale as one of a hero's,
I suffer no delusions, I know I am a psychopath.
I am not a part of God's great plan,
I am not an instrument of his divine will.I am the mere manifestation of human rage,
Softened by the plight of my kin.
All I know is that some men deserve to die,
And much like Him, in whose image I was made,I feel powerful with each life I take.
The thrill as my knife bleeds out the life in them,
The rush which courses through my body as I remove these social tumors,
Is far greater than the soft caress of lust.

Thus, I'd **** only to stay alive.

I know not whether you came to me or I to you.
Perhaps it was the former,
for goddesses may descend on earth,
but a shadow can never reach the stars.
Not whether it was a dream, asleep or awake.
Perhaps it was both, a special dream,
unrestrained by the bonds of sleep,
So pure, so powerful, that it spilled into the realms of reality.
I am lost in the darkness of a downcast heart.
Forever alone, never lonely.
A life much like a solitary desert,
with sands shifting in union with the sands of time.
Dream or reality. Let it be decided tonight,
Midst the sweet fragrance of your skin,
and the honeyed tastes of your lips.
Let the dark passions of this night take over.
As we weave forbidden magic...
But for now, I am scarcely mortal.
But for now, you are surely a goddess.
Perhaps you are to me, like a flame to a moth,
But it matters little to me, if I'm burnt in your embrace.

I find innocuous corners in the unfathomable depths of humanity.
Then I weave a silken web of lies against the tapestries of fate.
The longer the web takes, the more fabulous its construction, peppered both with illusions and realities.
For the greatest illusion is the one most rooted in truth.
I have no need to chase; my patience is as consummate a force as any;
I wait for my prey to come to me on their own,
And then I ensnare them, injecting them with venom,
Rendering them unable to escape.
The web is an extension to my soul. To my spirit.
It is me, and my weapon.
Its substance is known to me.
My webs are lies mixed with truths, despair colored with hope.
They are a crawling infinity of colors,
An eternal tribute to orderly and savage chaos.
Each strand, which links me to my prey and my predators,
Each one resonates under the steps of the dancing mad god,
Vibrating and sending little echoes of bravery or cowardice,
Satiation or hunger,
Destruction or architecture,
Blabber or argument,
Each strand carries my reaction to everyone who is connected to me.
Every intention, interaction, motivation that I have been plagued with,
Every color, everybody, every action and reaction that I have endured,
Every piece of physical reality and the thoughts that it engendered,
Every connection made, every nuanced moment of history and potentiality,
Every possible thing that ever was, ever is and ever will be with regard to me,
Woven into that limitless, sprawling web.
It is without beginning or end.
It is complex to a degree that humbles the mind.
It is not a weapon.
It is a trap.
A trap, one to which I fall every single time.
Infinitely bitten, never shy.
I can renounce the world again.
I can turn away once more.
But it never lasts.
The web is too spread out.
There are other spiders on it,
Spiders, which have tethered me to this plane of reality,
With their own silken threads.
It is too late.
Too late to draw the strings close.
It is too late.
Too late to destroy my prison, too late to destroy my weapon.
Too late for everything.

This town turns into a labyrinth at night,
A city of the sleeping dead,
If I wander these streets with nothing on my mind,
I can see it.
Buried under the dreams of those who are asleep,
Those who have locked away their passions.
Is my trembling heart
My reason for existence in that way,
My reason for existence in the same way,
Smiles and falls silent.
Why do my emotions sway as such?
I've always been looking,
Under a sun which was never meant to shine like this.
I can't see it anywhere
Where is key to that door.
The door to my love, hidden.
What's more important then words?
The time keeps passing and you can't realize it
Waiting for a sign to be taught like this
Let my music flow into my words. Let it ravage worlds.
A faint light shining on a real love
I'm looking for a reason
I've always been looking
Where could it have disappeared?
Where is that reason to live, laugh and love?
I hesitate to continue in this deep labyrinth
What if there is more pain?
My reason for existence in that way,
My reason for existence in the same way,
Smiles and falls silent.
Why do my emotions sway as such?
I've always been looking,
Under a sun which was never meant to shine like this.
I can't see it anywhere
Where is key to that door.
The door to my love, hidden.

I remember when I was a child,
A child amidst an ocean of rage.
Chaos clouded each step I took,
My emotions drained out of my soul.
I refined my rage, the crimson hate,
I resented Avarice, I had it all.
Fear had abandoned me long ago,
My will was strong, it burned with a glow.
I had abandoned Hope, for its light did not shine for me,
My dark soul saw compassion as a facade,
and Love was always locked away.
The blades of Chaos carved my soul,
its black hands destroyed my heart.
My innocence was lost to all,
Darkness seeped out of me to all near me.
Traitors and backstabbers I met with each day,
I smiled gruesomely as my mind they sliced.
On surface, all hope I had lost,
But deep within, my heart cried out.
I saw anguish and terror dark,
the flames of hell bathed my life.
And finally a day did come,
When in torment, an oath I took.
I promised to play life's game,
I swore to dissolve myself.
I carved a mask of glittering facades,
to hide away my inner self.
For years I lived like this,
shunning emotions and companionship.
I smiled when I cried, drank all my tears,
And tried to do where others had failed.
I was there for all,
A placid smile on my face.
But the fates are cruel,
they had the power to rule and send me back to my hell.
The mask of my facades one day I left,
Unknow to me my heart cried out.
It imprinted itself on the first soul it found,
But ah cruel fates, you had your say!
They crackled in their seats,
For they had the play manned.
They gave me one to love indeed,
But sadly she could not love me back.
Suddenly, my calm broke,
Crimson rage rose up like the blood of a corpse,
I was angry at fate, angry at myself.
Avarice found my heart,
I wanted her happy, I wanted her smiles.
Fear of rejection kept me at bay,
My will to fight gave way.
Cowardly hope claimed my heart,
In the eyes of allies, compassion I found.
Love with a vengenance found my heart,
Suddenly my heart a doeful song did sing.
My eyes sank deep into dark lament,
Chaos saw the doors of my heart open and with me insecure,
overcame me with a chaotic embrace.
In midst of pain and angst,A soothing voice I heard,
The Reaper with his scythe upturned,
called out to me in melodious refrains,
"Sleep with me Adam's child."
He asked of me,
Lay down in the fields of dew.
Drink a brew of hemlock,
And dream in silence, eternal in the lands of death.
My heart, a wounded animal cried,
It thought good of Death's offer.
My mind however lost not its faith,
and cried out to 'Life' to convince me again.
"My dear child" said the white lady,
"Lose not hope in life's turmoil,
I agree you have been witness to pain,
but fear not I will give you your respite.
"Would you listen to this beautiful lie?"
cried Death with his stony voice,
"I never lie but you, child of Adam,
must eventually die."
Anguish filled my darkened soul,
My mind was in torment and made no sense.
I dreamed of Life and that of Death,
but chose to go back again.

On a cold and bitter night,
A day when to celebrate a child's birth, children work,
A man lies dead in the snow.
Frozen by harsh reality,
This man lies dead, his open eyes staring at a polluted sky,
Where a tower blinks red, unlike his reindeer which men had for their flesh,
How can such a man exist, when what he stood for was compassion,
and now only avarice runs rampant today.
Above him, in a ratty apartment,
the TV blares advertisements made for holidays.
Above him, the people believe only in gifting to receive gifts,
Money can't buy you love,
Yet it seems so untrue when the cold wind kicks in.
This man lies dead on cold snow,
and no one lifts a finger to save him.
No cookies and milk wait for him near a warm hearth.
Santa is dead, the Grinch has won.

They say blood is thicker than water.
They say family matters the most.
I am the child of matrimonial diplomacy,
A ritual to bind the two ends of human nature,
I am a child of brutal union.
One of flesh, not of minds and hearts.
Yet now, as I am a relic of shattered times,
The world around me heals.
I am a painful reminder of the time I was ravaged.
I am a stranger to houses with warm hearths.
They say family gives you roots.
But what us the fruit of the plant whose roots have found no place?
Always misunderstood.
Never sad, unknown to joy.
I am a stranger to those who have lent me their blood and name.

It could be anytime,
It could be any seedy bar.
Walk in with the crowd,
And you'll see me there.
A man asks me to play him a memory,
This is the bar of dreams,
The only stranger is me.
I sing to him a song of youth, of love and belief.
There are so many faces, so many names,
So many friends that I've met,
So many dreams, hopes and views,
It's a miracle that the bar doesn't implode.
Take a breath, take a seat.
I'll borrow your words and write you a dream.
I'll stroke the keys, I'll bleed out my soul,
You'll wake up fresh and renewed.
The spotlight will slowly burn me away,
My body will surely burst into a thousand words.
But all of you shall be happy,
As my disembodied soul closes the doors.
Like Prometheus, I'll heal and live again.
For you, I'd write a song and a memory.

I can promise you the dying breaths of an eternal god.
I could promise you the laughter of a grieving child.
Yet I can't promise that I won't go anywhere
We might be separated someday,
And I always want to protect you,
Even when you can no longer see me under the sun,
The truth is, you will never be alone.
Always consider this.
The words of the last of its kind are always true.
This world is round, surely the sun will shine over us again.
Don't forget
There's always someone thinking of you
So try to smile, remembering that
The you inside the mirror is, always and forever,
Able to smile, when you turn to look at it
Don't forget
Someday, when all of this is done.
When this beautiful universe shall stop expressing itself through crazy me,
I'll breathe my last, your image burnt on my memories.
Always.
I'll remember every single line. Every silly nothing.
Forever more.

Behind the flickers of a cold glass screen,
A girl shivers and scrolls below.
A boy, is in another world,
Yet his memoirs are open for all.
He sings of life, of love, of pain,
Of lost loves and absent friends.
He writes of a land filled with shattered glass,
The sun was never meant to shine like this on him.
So he writes. His blood his ink, his memories his parchment.
He writes and writes, drinking his tears.
His soul is dead, his heart cries out.
And people here hear.
The girl shivering clammers on cold keys,
She combines words, weaving in something she never knew she could.
Life. Renewed hope.
And so from a million other worlds,
The boy received eternal hope.
And as the golden dust flows,
From wherever and whenever,
It becomes part of the shifting sands,
Forever more.
The twirling dunes, the joyful storm,
Banish the clouds of dreary doom.
Here's a toast from a salvaged demon,
To all who led his fractured salvation.Behind the flickers of a cold glass screen,
A girl shivers and scrolls below.
A boy, is in another world,
Yet his memoirs are open for all.
He sings of life, of love, of pain,
Of lost loves and absent friends.
He writes of a land filled with shattered glass,
The sun was never meant to shine like this on him.
So he writes. His blood his ink, his memories his parchment.
He writes and writes, drinking his tears.
His soul is dead, his heart cries out.
And people here hear.
The girl shivering clammers on cold keys,
She combines words, weaving in something she never knew she could.
Life. Renewed hope.
And so from a million other worlds,
The boy received eternal hope.
And as the golden dust flows,
From wherever and whenever,
It becomes part of the shifting sands,
Forever more.
The twirling dunes, the joyful storm,
Banish the clouds of dreary doom.
Here's a toast from a salvaged demon,
To all who led his fractured salvation.

I can feel your skin,
Soft, like rose petals, warm like a hearth at home
As I run my fingers up your spine,
Looking into your eyes.
Your whisper is like a song, singing the finest tunes,
it keeps the fires lit, deep down within the abyss of my soul,
I can see your soul.
I can feel your dreams.
Everything you were, are and shall be cease to exist.
Our lips touch.
There is no you and I anymore, only us.
My hand travels up to your neck.
I feel your pulse.
My heart has no beat.
It stopped the moment you looked at me.
Forbidden games are thrilling.
you hold me close, and I squeeze you tight.
You take my breath away,
Yet your breathing tells me you're nervous.
We'll stay there together,
I was engulfed in your touch.
Still, I am more alive with you than I have ever been.
How did I ever breathe before you?
Will I still breathe when you leave?
Will life matter at that point?
I trace your body with my finger tips.
I have memorized it.
Every curve.
A road to heaven in my heart.
This moment in time is perfect.
That is all that matters right now.
Tomorrow may come,
But tonight will last forever.

My identity is an enigma wrapped in a riddle,
My emotions hide behind a marble mask,
The shifting shadows make my cape,
The soft darkness looms over me,
Hidden in plain sight for none to see.
This is what I have been reduced to,
I am an amalgamation of him and her and them,
In fact, I could be anyone at all.
I smile, and the dagger on my tongue is hidden,
I laugh, and my hatred is hidden.
The best way to have everything is to leave everyone else with nothing,
And so. With thoughtful words and malicious intent,
A web of lies is wound around my prey.
The greatest treasure lies hidden in plain sight.
Say, have you seen it?

Through the veins of a noisy city,
A rickety tram snakes its way.
Save one compartment, all others are anything but silent.
So many people, so many paths,
So many dreams, so many starts,
Why does it hurt so much?
In the last compartment I sit alone,
With my eyes closed to the world outside.
The breeze tells me I am in motion,
But I gave forgotten where I need to go.
And so I curl up and sit alone,
Too tired to talk, too lonely to cry.
Suddenly, I hear the shuffling of feet.
Hello, a voice calls out to me.
It is sonorous, like Christmas mass,
With chiming bells and soft paradise.
Are you here alone?
Yes, I reply, yes I am.
Why have you closed your eyes?
Because I am afraid. I don't know what my destination is,
I don't know what sensations await me.
So you've shut off the light?
Yes, I reply sadly.
We could get off you know.
Could we?
Of course we could. Here. Take my hand.
Slowly, I take her hand.
The cold machinations which record my life in mechanical beeps,
Suddenly reel in shock, beeping in fits,
My closed eyes open and stare into the lamp above,
The masked men are shocked.
You've been out for hours they say, you were in a coma,
It is a miracle they said, shaking their heads.
Nay, I replied. It was her.

I know not whether you came to me or I to you.
Perhaps it was the former,
for goddesses may descend on earth,
but a shadow can never reach the stars.
Not whether it was a dream, asleep or awake.
Perhaps it was both, a special dream,
unrestrained by the bonds of sleep,
So pure, so powerful, that it spilled into the realms of reality.
I am lost in the darkness of a downcast heart.
Forever alone, never lonely.
A life much like a solitary desert,
with sands shifting in union with the sands of time.
Dream or reality. Let it be decided tonight,
Midst the sweet fragrance of your skin,
and the honeyed tastes of your lips.
Let the dark passions of this night take over.
As we weave forbidden magic...
But for now, I am scarcely mortal.
But for now, you are surely a goddess.
Perhaps you are to me, like a flame to a moth,
But it matters little to me, if I'm burnt in your embrace.

Soft tunes emanate from an abandoned dream,
Wafting through my memories, calling out to me.
Akin to a siren's call, yet a thousand times worse.
I am caught and trapped by these relations.
I have shunned love so many times, to forsake the pain it inflicts on me everytime.
Why doesn't my stupid heart understand?
Why does it love you your the so much ferocity, that I cannot gauge its intensity?
I cannot stop this.
It is natural for me to love you now.
Save me.
Will you listen to the dying wishes of my shattered heart?
Will you fulfil its wants?
Grant me eternal sleep,
Drench me completely in your love.
You looked into my heart and found my lost dream,
A very common one I guess it may seem.
No one else like you in my heart is the same,
Because I've really changed since in my life you came.
You told me that my faith rests in my hands,
To make life as best I can.
You took my hand and out of the shadows I ran.
With my back to the dark and my heart towards the light,
You told me to do what I thought was right.
No matter how close you are it feels as though you're miles away.
Such was the effect of being with you,
I do not know why,
Why do I cease to exist now that I am alone?
I have bled. My essence is captured in my words.
Why can't I speak out your name?
Is it because your name is now my heartbeat? Pulsating in me?
As my fractured heart bleeds,
Would you hear my anguished cries?
Help me. Save me.
Love me.

Strands of sunlight breeze into quiet courtyards,
Swaying threads of crimson spring.
Pausing a while, you fix your hair,
Contemplating the mirror which steals your silhouette.
Cloud like tresses trail to one side,
Dare you step outside?
If you don't come to the garden, how would you know that springtime is like this?
Due to your reluctance, such splendor is abandoned.
Where are the sounds of joy in this garden?
Your beauty is concealed in the hall of your words.
Like the early spring which no one sees.
For your beauty is like the flowers which sway and float on the river of eternal time.
This brief moment, when our fates collide,
Is made in heaven,
Pillowed on grass, bedded among flowers.
This annoying strong wind of my troubles,
Messes flowers, and betrays the beauty of springtime.
Ah.
Thus, the view is wasted.

The cold darkness around him does not scare him,
The wafting moonlight does.
As his pen touches the parchment,
Memories rise up, like the blood which spills from his wounds,
Dear dad,
It's been a while.
I don't know what to say,
I don't know what to write.
You were my father, once.
Do you remember the walks we took?
Do you remember that elephant ride?
We were a family once.
You, me, mum and sis.
What happened then?
Who was it who killed my father?
Was it the stress of modern day?
Was it the stereotypical past making its way,
Spilling its hatred into our future,
Poisoning our now?
I remember watching you drink.
I always wanted to swat that glass away.
What was in it that made you so evil?
Was it really the alcohol, or was it you all along?
Who are you?
Are you the man who was my father?
Or are you the man who cracks his belt at me for my own good?
I remember the day you died for me.
The day our brittle family broke under the bludgeoning of your abuse.
Do you remember?
Do you recall how you tried to hurt the ones I loved?
Do you remember how I shoved you aside?
For a moment the boy pauses,
His grief welling inside.
But he does not allow himself the luxury of tears,
He doubts if he can.
Dear dad.
Where the hell is my father?
Why did you have to walk that path?
Did you not remember the days we laid back and talked about everything?
And now as I sweep away the broken shards,
Trying to forget you forever,
Swearing not to be your heir,
This question haunts me.
Who the hell were you?
No matter what happens though,
I know you'll always be there.
The embodiment of human rage,
The capacity to fall as low as I can.
No matter how hard I run away,
You'll always be there.
Striking out with your belt,
Destroying everything I care,
For my own good perhaps.
Why are you always there?

He was pitifully weak, yet he was brutally strong.
She couldn't get out of his grasp.
He ripped off her clothes, took off her dignity.
She was his, but he would never be hers.
She was pressed against his repulsive sweaty skin, yet her blood was freezing, even though her veins were on fire.
She shouts, screams and cries.
The man's humanity is dead, he cannot hear her.
Humanity is dead, mortals turn away their ears,
The Gods live no more, repulsed by the acts of their creation.
No one can hear her but herself.
His eyes are full of lust, pleasure, strength and cruelty.
She might have been caught off guard, but he had carefully planned this.
This was not just a ****** transgression,
It was the brutal bludgeoning of a soul.
She slowly loses even hope,
Only empty cries and flooding eyes exist.
The sun was never meant to shine like this.
Holy blood trickles down and mixes with impure sweat,
Each tear drop, each cry excites him more.
What sort of a man was he?
Naked, bound, gagged and tossed aside.
His brutal thrusts and ***** words have destroyed her soul.
How can such a man exist?
How can the Gods be so unjust?