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even though i don't know you yet
and i know we've never met
i feel so much love, straight from the heart
and i can't wait for you to be a part
of this family that's wanted you for so long
can't wait to play you a bedtime song
rock you to sleep in waiting arms
do my best to protect you from harms
teach you of the world i want you to know
watch you learn, see you grow
give you all i have to give
and you'll show me how to live
and make each day an adventure
i'll never feel anything as pure
i'll hold your little hand, touch your face
you make the world a more beautiful place
loving you will never be too late
and it will all be worth the wait
to the child i love so much
whose life i can't wait to touch
i may not have carried you
but this love is so true
because you were chosen
you said you wanted the truth
the ramblings of a misspent youth
as if it'd set us free
there was always more to me
than anyone gave me credit for
how i always wanted more
is it bittersweet?
when two worlds meet
how i longed for a simple life
to be a mother, to be a wife
days pass by and i'm too tired to sleep
and i feel a fire burning way down deep
i close my eyes and try to see
is this really the best of me?
somedays the world seems strange
living a life where things don't change
i know i wouldn't change a thing
little hands in mine, my wedding ring
somedays i know you feel it too
and it never was about you
it's me, this wild and new desire
to light the night, set the world on fire
be the change i want the world to see
all these dreams that make up me
they call her bus stop Betty, don't mind the bags
the matted hair and how her clothes are in rags
she smiles with missing teeth
shows you the shoes on her feet
covered in holes, one missing a heel
"it don't matter, it's how I feel
when the clouds come rolling by
i know i ain't got a reason to cry
because God been good to me
he ain't done, this ain't who i'm gonna be"
whatever she has she's willing to share
as she folds her hands in prayer
gives thanks for a life many would pity
but she sees real beauty, knows what's pretty
she sees past the violence, the crime
there's so much more than dirt and grime
that makes up this woman, she's hiding wings
i feel the faith every time she sings
and when i see her weep
i know it just goes so deep
beyond what i could understand
and how she fits here in this land
i buy her breakfast, we become friends
we talk about beginnings, about ends
how life is one great circle, constantly spinning
i see her watching me, she's grinning
and it's in those dark brown eyes, that toothless smile
that makes me realize it's all worth while
and that there's a life greater than I'm living
the purpose here is loving... and giving
I found you
so lost and helpless
and I tried to call for you
to let you know
my love is forever
that no matter what
I would give my life for you
time and time again
I'd bear that cross
if it meant forgiveness
for your sins
because i know that you
yes, you
are so much greater
than you believe
i walk with you
even when you cannot see
and i try to let you know
i'd never abandon you
because you are part of me
and we're all made of love
when you are blind
i will sing to you
when you go deaf
i will touch your hand
and someday
when we're face to face
you may ask me why
I've wept
and I will say
out of love my child
because no matter how dark
you were led by faith
stars shining against inky skies
and you can't find the truth in my eyes
all the lives i've known before
always seeking something more
than this
steal a kiss
seal it with your word
sweetest thing i ever heard
i always liked pretty things
try to distract you from my wings
that have turned dark as coal
something stirs inside my soul
passion? hope?
where's the rope?
i'll lasso it in
so i can live again
across foreign sands
searching for your hands
to bring me back home
the only place i belong
if you taste the pain
you'll know that tears stain
and you can't outrun the past
sometimes memories last
sometimes my words sound hollow
like a plot i just can't follow
and i wonder if this is me
or am i just trying to be
whatever makes things right
i wanna paint my words across the night
sew up wounds that never heal
just for once be okay to feel
i've locked my demons up inside
all these scars i tried to hide
and now i feel them bleeding through
so many things i want to do
but i've been holding back
in the shadows, in the black
the darkest night i had no calm
holding my dreams in my palm
feeling them slip between each finger
heart beats slowly, thoughts still linger
is this it? all that i have to give?
is this the life i choose to live?
everything here is a choice
i just have to find my voice
and scream
if you have a dream
you should go for it
whether you miss or hit
and there is so much more to me
than you can imagine, than you can see
but i have to believe it first
untitled (poem by me)

lift me up because i can't fly
& i'm only pretty when i cry
when all my dreams turn to dust
i know that there's nothing to trust
you can never really outrun the pain
all these tears are gonna leave a stain
when i feel so lost in the crowd
how this silence sounds so loud
i wonder if i'll fall apart
missing pieces of my heart
have left me feeling dead inside
what's it worth, the tears i've cried
feels like i'm falling, gonna crash
there's no light in the smoke & ash
darkness calling, like a sad song
i wasn't meant to be this strong
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