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Aisling Labrys Nov 2020
The world tastes bitter in my mouth
So I throw it up
And the regurgitation is just as sour
As my withered, hopeless heart.

Everything is grey
A monotone buzz, a hiss, a ringing
A cloud of distortion
That plagues my every waking moment.

It drives me to the brink of insanity
The haze of existence
The curse of being alive.
I yearn to reject it, cast it away

Out of my body
To detox from my programming
To scoop out my insides and start again
With purer intentions

And when I spit it out
My salvia is as red as blood.
When I scratch my face
Skin slides off of muscle

For the taste of rot
Is oh so bitter
And my body is decaying
As I am trapped in despair.
Aisling Labrys Nov 2020
It's so hard to recover
In a world that says
Less is more
And tragedy is beautiful
But suicide is reserved for the depraved
And selfish

"How could they leave
Their friends,
Their families,
Their loved ones?"

You cry
And pass judgement on the dead
The dearly departed tortured souls
Who were ignored when alive
And berated when passed.

Save your words
Your condemnation
For the system that reduces us to machines
And statistics
And unfeeling robots
With no need to eat or cry or tell you the truth when you ask:

"How are you?"

When no one cares for your honest answer
Because the script says:

"I'm fine."

And fine you are
Safely snuggled in the blanket of earth
The mud filling your ears and muffling their criticism
So they don't have to face
That they didn't do enough.
Aisling Labrys Nov 2020
My dear,
If only you could see your beauty
As I see it.
Your radiance in its true form
Is not something I'm sure
I am able to comprehend,
For I am not worthy to gaze upon it
As a mortal,
I think my eyes would melt out of my skull.

And you, my love
A goddess of love, passion
Your fires burn hot and bright
And that man you chase
Has pulled wool over his eyes, squeezed them close
Turned away
If he does not see how you glow.
An ignorant fool,
He is unworthy
He holds a torch and thinks it is the same
As raw fire
That rages through whole forests
Reducing them to ash within moments.

You reduce me to ash
And I crash down to my knees to worship
The goddess of intrinsic beauty
Whose soul radiates more light
Than an exploding star.
You, my darling,
Are a supernova
An end to your reign leaves a gaping hole in the universe
A hole that cannot be filled
But it continues to try to be
To satisfy the goddess that birthed it.

Are you hungry? I wonder
It must take a lot to sustain such a roaring flame.
Will you ever hunger for more
Than a man with fleeting loyalties
With pitiful gratitude for the gift that is
You?
My eternal,
Will you accept this sacrifice
Of my living flesh, and my mortal soul?
I offer myself to you,
Sunshine
In the hopes to satisfy
Your lust for adventure
And need of embrace.
Aisling Labrys Nov 2020
I did something bad
In the depths of blackness
Not a soul could see
What they'd say was senseless.
Shrouded by nightfall
My sins seem brighter
And there's no one to say, 'Come morn,
It'll be lighter
And you'll see your sins
In their entire unholy sacrilege.
So burn tonight;
Tomorrow brings carnage.’

— The End —