And at this point,
I don't know what to do with myself.

I find that I can't stop chasing memories.

Whether or not I should stay,
Is unknown.
But the thought of going back,
Following you into the forest every night,
Teases me
As I watch the sun set,
And the moon rise.

Hiding from the stars.
Tempting me
With your sweet eyes
And your long fingers
That with a snap,
Could break my heart once again.

Yet all I can tell myself,
Is that until I see you again
And follow right in your footsteps
I am lost.
And forever will be.

I haven't eaten
in three days
because my own self loathing
has kept me full.

I haven't written my college essays
because I know that it won't change
anything.

I haven't told my friends
that by Christmas,
I won't be here,
because I'm afraid
to see them cry.

So I keep it to my self,
and watch as life goes on
as I silently weep
for what could've been.