Falling.


Until
I stumble upon
anything
anyone
something
that attaches to me.

Eat away my sanity
innocence,
and mind.

Morph me into what you want,
what I need to be.
I'm fine.
I'm perfect.
The best you ever had,
And then go.

Find a new flower to pluck.
Inhale its enchanting scent,
and rob it of its
unforgiving nectar.

Then leave it to decay,
As you did with me.

Let it rot in its vase
never to escape.
Stuck,
on your
bewitching touch.

The dust packs on heavier each day,
as a new snowfall
on a mountain top.
Let me disappear,
buried
in unspoken states.

Your blood flows like ink
And your words taste like *****.

Each look makes me feel
as if I am stuck in a storm
of knives.

I don't need anyone to tell me I'll be okay.
Or that everything is just
fine.

And I certainly did not order a subscription
for your *******.

The fly in my room reminds me
that all will be forgotten,
eventually.
Especially
you.

The bruises that decorate your pale skin,
greet me with a
"you were never mine",
yet,
I was always yours.

The flowers you picked for me sit
and decay,
much like
my kindness for you.

Another tooth falls out everyday.
Which I no longer care about,
Because no one ever listened in the first place.

Her obsession is eating you away,
you're simply
a cooked vegetable
now.

So this time,

close your eyes

when I go

to

hide.

Silent.

Her face is sore from wiping the tears away,
because she knew that everything
would soon
mean nothing.

And the words
"I don't know why I ever trusted you"
scream at her over and over again,
and all she can see is his face.

As she lays there
she allows each conversation they had
echo through her memories,
refusing
to let them slip away.

Looking in the mirror,
now
all she sees
is a corpse.
Filled with sinful thoughts,
that would make her mother cry.

But she takes it in,
Welcoming this feeling to
consume her.

Until she is nothing.

Until everything is nothing.

And she can be forgotten.

"You makes all the bad choices."
"It's not a surprise that you don't have any friends."
"You're the reason this family is falling apart."
"Hopeless."
"Little selfish good for nothing *****."
"You're a mess."
"Why are you such an idiot?"
"Why would anyone ever trust you."
"A disappointment."

"I wish we could be proud of you for something."

The sweet melody
of my parents voices,
whispering loving words
in my ears
each night.

and
I don't know what to tell you.

I am
nothing
but the
dead flowers
next to my bed.

A candle
that has been lit for
so long
that
it's
simply
a pile of wax.

*******
in knots,
not even I
can untangle
my thoughts.

For I am
a maze,
that no one
seems to figure out,
or
enjoy.

Maybe
I think
that sometimes
you are the same,
and that we could be lost,
together.