There’s something funny
about a loved one’s death
it’s like climbing up a flight of stairs
and thinking there’s one more stair than there is
so you put your foot down
and it passes through the air and hits the ground
it’s a shock,
your heart beats really fast
and then nothing.
Absolutely nothing.

I remember your face
your smile
your laugh
I remember the times
When, as a kid,
I giggled in glee
and flew paper aeroplanes around
on your lap
I remember your hand
how it fit into mine
like it was meant to be
how you told me
everything’s gonna be alright

and now I remember
the huge gaping hole in my chest
where my heart used to be.

I remember staring at your face
And thinking,
“this isn’t you”
I remember how they dressed you up
and laid you there
and I struggled with the realization
that someone, something in my life
would never come back

it was like I watched you
walk into the ocean
deeper and deeper
until the waters covered your head
I was screaming, crying
Begging you to come back
For me
But you didn’t hear a word I said

Yeye, Mama, YiDioh,

I sing what I cannot speak
I write what I cannot say
My heart beats for you
I will never give up

Everything you taught me
How to be brave
How to be strong,
When I’m afraid
How to press on
How to hold on
How to keep the light in my eyes alive

I love you,
You had a great ride,
And I will never forget you.

i've never met you before,
never seen your face,
except in those pictures and videos they show on television.
never heard your laugh, never seen you smile in person.

yet somehow i feel that i know you.

and it breaks my heart
to think that you will never
be thirteen,
never go to a new school,
never meet new friends,
never be in a new environment with new people.

you will never feel the joy of becoming a teenager,
never get your PSLE results,
never again pull your favorite shirt out of the closet to wear,
never laugh and smile with new friends.

you were-are, twelve.
too young.
too soon to go.
you were a spark in the dark
that has been extinguished too early;
the night is still young.

and i will miss you,
because you represented childish joy to me,
something the world will miss dearly.

go in peace, and may you find happiness wherever you are.