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Anshika Jul 2013
My hands ball into fists
I can’t handle this
My face is red
i have to clear out my head

I hate it
I feel like ****
Every day I spiral down
While my friends don’t even frown

I’m so sick of it all.
Why can’t I just fall
To the Floor?
i can’t take it anymore.

You know what? I’m done.
I hope you had your fun.
Since I don’t have a gun,
i guess I’ll just have to run.
Anshika Jun 2013
People rush by
Bumping others harshly
Never stop to apologize
They get on with their lives

The scene keeps changing
No one ever staying
They have places to go
They’re busy, you know?

It’s ironic I think
There’s such a big crowd
Yet I’m on the brink
Of screaming aloud.

There’s something I don’t get
I’m here on my own
If people surround me
Why do I feel so alone?
Anshika May 2013
What is it?
Is it, being stunning, without a single flaw?
having a perfect figure, a well-defined jaw?
Is it shutting in your emotions and keeping composure?
Perhaps being ******* clad, with indecent exposure.

No.
Beauty is none of the above

It is acceptance, and self love
Not listening to others who try to bring you down
Shrugging off the haters without so much as a frown.

Beauty is a smile, a confident walk
Not listening to when the naysayers talk
No one else can define what is true
Beauty is simply being you
Anshika May 2013
I gather up the courage to ask you
What’s been boiling in my mind.
I steel myself and type those words
To click send took a lot of time.
I’m okay.  I’m okay.

I was hoping for confirmation
Some comforting explanation.
Instead, I got a dose of reality
The truth never works out for me.
I’m okay.  I’m okay.

Tuesday morning, I woke up.
I just lay in my bed.
I thought about last night
Played it back through my head
I’m okay.  I’m okay.

I stepped into the shower, my sniffles faint
My resolve crumbles and so do I.
At last, I’m free of restraints.
On the shower floor, where I can cry.
I’m okay.  I’m okay.

At school, I’m slow, unresponsive
Some notice, they ask me if I’m good.
Obviously, I lack my normal grin.
To strangers, I’m just “misunderstood”
I’m okay.  I’m okay.

I get home, log back on.
I’m sorry.
I thought my tears were gone.
I log out.  Close my laptop.
Me too.
I’m still okay.  I’m still okay.

Later, when I come back online
I happen to see a certain post on your wall
I thought I was fine.
But as it turns out
*I’m not okay at all.
Anshika May 2013
Whenever I have a bad day
Or things just don’t go my way
I pop in my earphones
And listen to the soothing notes
They take me away, to the land of my dreams
Where I can lay in peace, and escape reality.
All my burdens just magically disappear.
For a while, nothing in life is queer.
It’s just me, my thoughts, and the music.

When life was hard, when I was hurt
When I had nowhere else to turn
Music was always there, with a welcoming smile
Ready to comfort me, and take me away for a while.
I got lost in the world that fills me with glee
I got lost in the world where notes are plenty.
Where it’s just me, my thoughts, and the music.

Music is the perfect key
To the door between dreams and reality
It ebbs and flows in just the right way
To create a beautiful dancing ballet.
From me, my thoughts, and the music.

My music is my own.
The one place where I have no clone
The one thing that makes me different from all of you.
No one else controls what I listen to.
There is no one that I’ll have to face
When I’m in my safe little place.
The place where it’s just me, my thoughts, and the music.
Anshika May 2013
My eyes dance across the pages
The words take me through the ages
To different worlds, places unknown
Where I wouldn’t dare to enter alone.

To some, reading is a chore
When asked to read, they reply “it’s a bore”
But they don’t know the true joys
Of a story about wizards, or one of little boys

The best books are the ones that pull you in
Make you a part of them, cause you to grin
There are also amazing books make you cry
You sit there, staring at the book as tears flow from your eyes

Books are reliable, always waiting to be read
Never needing to be charged, never going to be “dead”
Behind every cover is a story waiting to be told
Once you open a good book, let the memories unfold!
Anshika May 2013
I’m not important
Not special in any way
Would things be different
If I disappeared today?

Don’t tell me they would be.
My friends would move on.
No one would miss me
for all that long.

My parents call me amazing
They say I’ll change the world.
I know they’re mistaken.
I’m just an average girl.

To people at school,
I’m the girl that’s always happy.
I don’t think they realize
That even my life is ******.

— The End —