I'm constantly doubting
Those that came before and wondering
Was it me that caused all the trifling before?
No not I.
But you.
You caused the doubt.
And made me feel crazed.
About tallying up as if I had something to prove.

Yes I could be better than the rest.

Not anymore.
Now I've realized I havent been fighting for the best.
But only to be second best.

And I've cut myself short.

The things I'd give to have you in my living room
Once again.

A hidden love
Untouched.

I miss you so much.

I'm afraid of airports
Not because of flying
Or security

But because when I enter
There are so many emotions
Sadness happiness fear nostalgia

As soon as I pull in
I can feel all of it.

The heartbreak of a loved one leaving
Never to return.

The happiness of seeing a long lost friend
You'd feared you would never see again.

Some people make a trip
Just to remember
The one time they said good bye
And not hello again.

Dear soulmate,
I met you once
You were standing
So was I

We talked,
Mostly with our eyes
Not then said I realize

I thought maybe
You said no
So again it was just I

I met you twice
This time sitting
I figured this time friends

Friends we were
Time came along
And as it does made me realize

I've loved you along.

Its to bad time skews
And separates
Those that maybe are meant to be

Its a complicated world
But maybe I'll see you
A third time around

And know I've loved you along.

The day you left
you didn't only leave my side
you removed me from your life.

At times I feel a tingle
wash over my lips

When I'm driving
In the shower
after waking up from a nightmare
in front of the television

It come's at no particular time
with no warning

It wash's over me
with intense desire

and I wonder
at that time
is it because you're thinking of me?
or is it because you've replaced your love for me
with a bottomless outlet
to pour your emotions into

and I'm left feeling the heartbreak
all over again.

I loved you
More than the moon and the stars
More than the sunrise in all its glory.

Then I knew you.

I ached
And turned
1200 miles away

Then I knew you.

You spoke of a world ending.
I feared this truth
And wished only to spend the end times with you.

Then I knew you.

Every lie
Every deceit
Every promise un-kept.

Then I knew you.

Now you've returned.
Stating I'm the only love for you.
You'll never leave.

But I know you.

Can you remember when you first seen the sunrise?

It began with the soft whisper of a deer
the gentle howl of an owl
and the fierce roar of a bear

secluded in the tree's
the long winding roads
I'd ride along

I found myself
I found us
I found a friend

One that would always be around
as long as I'd listen for her
she'd always speak

But only when
I was ready
to listen.