how am i smiling? what did you do to me? you've changed the chemicals that were imbalanced in my mind, you're the miracle i couldn't find, to this disease passed on, biological. somehow you've healed me and i'm smiling!
i can picture it now! you and me on a porch swing, or me, the passenger when you're driving with all the windows down. lets do that someday, just go for a drive. and when the sun sets, we'll find a quiet spot and blankets and lower our voices to whispers... whispers soft as fleece and cotton *****... sweet nothings? no. sweet somethings. i'm in love with you and your whispers...
do you ever just wake up and want to keep sleeping? sleep through the day to avoid the pain and the weeping. the blankets are so warm and the world so frozen; frozen from the pain hidden in it, pain left unspoken. no, i don't want to wake up yet, i'll just stay here, curled up against you under the blankets all year.
somehow i find solace in my closet. in the sweaters, shirts, and shoes. its odd, really, how one could love the objects which cover the body and not the people which cover ones soul.
beanies, boots, furs, and scarves, paired with soothing sounds of passing cars. warm mugs of tea on the days dark and dreary- enough to forget the years' scars. cool mountain air isn't really far, but the journey there's bound to make me weary.