I missed you. I was gone for long that's true, I've done you wrong. I don't know why, though. My mind's been busy with the highs and lows of life's mystery. I've kept wondering about people and feelings. How they can hurt so much and how they control me. I hate it but that's how it is. You know me enough, you know what I mean. I didn't write my thoughts down because I didn't need to. I don't think it's betrayal. See, I'm writing them now. Better late than never they say. Performing it here is like regaining a strength, really. Like I'm meeting an old friend I haven't been seeing.
And it feels good. I feel tired because of course it's late and I'm in bed but how I'm thrilled for fighting sleep cause once again, I'm inspired by the months I've had to live, away from family and friends I admire, away from the fire of the trouble that used to consume me. And still, not much has changed. I've learned a lot. I've read books and took a plane. I've talked. I've been a fool and unafraid and look. I'm still faithful to a piece of paper and a pen cause after all I've been through, I endlessly trust them.
That's the great thing about you. You don't talk, you listen. You don't judge, you're patient. You don't move, you don't flee. You just stay and stand still and the words are like a wave crushing your skin, brushing your face but you don't care.
I write and you let me. I'm glad I have the chance cause it's the only thing I will never regret.

You will find that they are rules beyond laws and fools in everything love does. It’s more than just passion and it’s stronger than life. It’s like a flow of emotions playing you like toys. If you’re too weak, it’s so painful it makes you bleed from the inside and you don’t understand why such a powerful thing took over you like it did. One can’t imagine the force it’s bringing in a heart once it’s big enough to fill the hole. A hole dug by addiction and loss, made by fear and disappointment, a hole that will always get bigger if no one believes it can close. But some wounds are better left open as long as the right cure has not been found and a scar that can’t be healed is not something that you can hide. It shows every day on your face, in your eyes, in the way you look at people you like, in the way you talk, in the way you think, people can see that you don’t believe. Yet, there’s no need to hurt for something you want so bad. You can have everything you want if you know yourself enough.

No matter hardships, disappointments, bad luck,
as long as you’re breathing and you know it,
don’t even think it’s not worth it.

Your life is a gift and even if it sometimes feels like hell you need to tell yourself that you will survive it.
As I’m watching you laying here, sleeping with tiredness and you told me you hated it and you couldn't bear living like this, I’m hoping you can somehow see the bright side of it cause it’s there.

I’d rather have to go through all this for months than never being able to see you again my friend.
It can take this stuff to happen for you to realize you’re not done with life, you’re gonna keep fighting, you’re gonna win, you always do and as long as I’m here, I will keep reminding you.

Every time, I draw. I draft stupid things I don’t like but it passes the time.
Circles and curves, my pen draws curls and shapes, boys and girls, pets and landscapes, stuff that are nonsense in everybody else’s world.
Starting a line not knowing what it is, that’s fascinating to imagine why everything’s s easy to make, too weird to make real but so fun to create.
You don’t think. You let dreams draw your wish and in the end you feel kind of proud and fulfilled to see you’re not that empty inside.

Letting air out, breathing deeply
Eyes are closed & hands are heavy
Heart’s pounding at maximum speed.
On the edge, facing the wind
Clouds are grey but the Sun is shining.
And your ears ache, your toes are freezing
Because the snow is getting deadly
But you’re not afraid of what could that be.
Your life’s over and you know what it means.
Getting to see those you lost, feeling at last that you have hopes.
Begging to fly to the other side and spending days dying out
See this ship made of white pearls, maybe that’s you, maybe that’s it.
Enjoy this trip of thousand worlds. You won’t come back that easily.