Have you seen my head?
I think it fell off my shoulders.
And along with it rolled my thoughts.
They stumble and rattle,
Unable to be resolved.
I don't know what to do,
When just your presence makes me feel this way.
Have I stepped into a dream?
Im unable to beleive that this is real.
Where has that head gone off to,
Bringing my thoughts rolling along?

My heart is flawed, tender, and inexperienced. Love has never fallen easily into it's midst. And yet, here I am, falling more and more for you. Why must I be so unsure? Why must I question my feelings towards you? Under normal circumstances, if my falling in love could even hope to be considered normal, I'd tell my friends in a heart beat. By my heart is wavering and unsure ... or maybe it's my mind. My heart seems set enough and drawn to you, but my mind is questioning and is looking to be logical. When will I know for sure how I feel about you?

            Sincerely an admirer who wants to understand.

Had it been so long,
That I confuse a skipping heart,
To one that beats with fear?
Does nervousness and anxiety run its  quarters?
Or is it beating like a drum,
But I can't tell the two apart,
After he ripped out my heart and ate it so many years ago.
Then what is thumping in that cavity?
What lies restless where my heart used to be?

This weight called gravity,
I cannot defy it.
It's pulling me closer to you.
I don't wanna admit
That I'm questioning it,
That I'm capable of these emotions,
I want to turn an anti gravity switch,
And come back down to Earth.
I need to protect my brain,
Before you **** out all my air.
I need some space to breathe.
To choose if I will fly to the moon,
Or come back home.
Yet it's not my choice.
The gravity pulls me
Despite my commplaints and questions.

Why?
Oh why?
Must I have this sadness
that follows my smile?
In a moment of joy relives a moment of realization.
The realization that I have lost you,
and all that you do.
Before I was even able
To learn of my own intentions.
My interest in what worries you,
in where your smile blooms from,
And what scares you.
Before the race was able to begin,
I have already lost you to another.
I'm not the type to take what is not their own.
You have stolen my heart,
but I will not lay a hand on yours.
If she owns it - I will forget.
I know I am defeated,
and will erase all traces of you that make me happy.
But for this instance,
this gleeful feeling of a moment shared with friends,
let me dwell in this sorrow till morning comes.
Then I will forget about you.

I watch a love blossom from behind this pane.
I see the two figures meet for the first time.
It's only through a couple of typed conversations,
leading the girl to fall in love with his words.
Through my standing point I see her phone number across the screen,
wondering what she got herself into.
He replies,
and everyday it's the same.
She let the people she loves,
the other figures that walk around this house,
fall from her life.
They desperately try to be apart of her life,
so she locks her room door.
They knock,
ceaselessly trying to touch her heart.
She holds her hand over her ears,
texting with the other.
Barely making out the texts from my window view I see things no girl would want to hear nor say.
He hurts her emotionally and threatens her physically,
and she just wishes to disappear.
Finally light enters her room as I lift an arm to readjust myself to it.
She let's them in,
telling them to block him from her life.
Her sister sighs,
her worries quenched,
her bent over mom hugs her to try to fill her with warmth and love.
...
A couple of years pass and still I watch,
not much happening,
but the girl now falls away from her friends and family once more.
She has a new texting friend,
One her mother and sister adore,
rather she's hiding from shadows and shaking in her shoes.
Her sister worries,
but goes untold,
as the girl whispers to her mothers ear, "Do you see them too?"
Time goes on and her sister worries more.
Drawings are scribbled of creatures that would only exist in nightmares,
But they exist for the girl.
Years ago she could see them.
Her family believing it only a brilliant imagination.
But, no.
That's not so.
Her new love worries countess times until he pleads with her to tell her family.
I watch through my glass boundary,
a spectator who has been shown quite a tragedy,
The sister leaves,
off on a school trip,
than the girl is missing for a time,
The sister and mother leave the house once a week,
they're gone for a couple of days at a time.
two weeks pass and finally the girl returns home.
I try to listen through this screen,
hearing "psychiatry Hospital"
At night the girl takes prescribed pills,
they scare away her visions.
She goes to school - but comes back early
shaking and tired,
but at night,
not a single dream will come as she stares at the wall.
She does not smile,
and will not speak to friends she used to enjoy the company of.
But I have little I can do to become a performer in this play.
I am merely a spectator, a friendly everyday window watcher.
Or am I?

Sincerely
                      The sister

Eyes watching the wall,
unable to close.
A tangible knot of loose ends,
awake in the mind.

Recall those times,
when that knot wishes to be undone,
but instead is pulled further,
weighing on the mind.

Time ellipses,
More thinking to be done,
so much stress built up,
in one sleepless night.

These thoughts of mine are long harbored unseen,
Shall never be mine to forever keep,
Opened by poems, shared for others to see,
When they are read, they slither and they creep,
Into the hearts of those who view these words,
These feelings of mine are universal,
Shar’d between all, from heroes to cowards.
And repeated often through rehearsal.
Echoed throughout time, understood by all.
Uncontained, as they dance throughout all hearts,
Finding lingering pieces to enthrall.
Only to pierce straight through, thrown like a dart.
This is how a poet can change your view,
Keeping this to heart, I bid you adieu.